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Breaking Bad Terrarium

By: on March 17, 2013
Discontinued

Way to go, Walter White and meth heads, Breaking Bad has reached terrarium levels of popularity. Terrarium. I find that word difficult both to spell and to say aloud. Try it. Rough on the tongue, 'ey? Not very pleasant on the ears either when I really think about it, which I am because I have nothing better to do. Aquarium. Now that's a generally congenial word. But clutter it up with a couple more Rs and it becomes a guttural disaster. Would you like to know what I think about some other words? As in, the best and worst words in the English language? Sure you would.

BEST WORDS IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE

  • Galoshes. Inarguably the greatest word ever to join phonemes.
  • Monkey. Inarguably the second greatest word to join phonemes.
  • Carabiner. I think girls should be named Carabiner.
  • Shazam. Explanation unnecessary.

WORST WORDS IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE

  • Panties. Courtesy of my friend Cornelius. I don't love this word, but Cornelius F'ing hates it. Anyone who says it in his presence has to buy him a shot of Jager or accept an atomic wedgie.
  • Wart. Mostly because I cannot hear or see this word without thinking of that scene from Uncle Buck where John Candy throws a quarter at his niece's principal and tells her to take it, go downtown, and have a rat chew that thing off her face. RIP, John Candy.
  • Angina. I don't particularly like the word "vagina" either, but at least it represents something I do like. Angina is both hideous-sounding, and means you have coronary heart disease.

Breaking Bad flora fabricator extraordinaire Rachel, also responsible for this piece of Beetlejuice amazement, uses real moss and lichen in her terrariums--in this case varietals that, much like Heisenberg's haircut, require little water and care. The plants also sit in succulent and cactus-friendly soil for people who want to add some vegetation to the wreckage. The open globe is 11" tall and includes a hand-sculpted and painted miniature re-enactment of the series' famed first season opening sequence. Walter stands 1/4" tall and his RV 1/2" long. A shout out to Breaking Bad's breakout star, meth, comes in the form of blue sea glass lining the bottom of the terrarium.

Specific set inclusions: reindeer moss; lichen; a petrified mushroom; a small tree; stones; sand; sculptures; and instructions for assembly.

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Mini Marimo Aquarium

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Walter White Hyperflesh Mask

$22,100 from Ebay »

Worn, signed, and sweated upon by Bryan Cranston himself. Also mingled in: the DNA of Jimmy Fallon and Common, whom the Breaking Bad star let take a turn in this Landon Meier Hyperflesh Walter White mask at Comic-Con...

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Breaking Bad Methopoly

Discontinued

Joanne Silverman loves meth. Just kidding. She loves Breaking Bad. I mean, I guess she might love meth too, but probably not because if she did it is unlikely she would have the wherewithal to conceive and create this...

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Biopod Smart Microhabitat

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Breaking Bad Meth Lab

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Would LEGO ever produce and release a Breaking Bad Meth Lab? Probably not even if its CEO and Board of Directors were all required to inadvertently step on an errant brick once an hour, every hour of the day, every day...

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Grow Your Own Escargot Kit

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Note: Converting them from snails to escargot is optional. You are welcome just to grow them and name them and keep them as snuggly (with a side of slime) pets. Otherwise: Attention kitchen magicians! If your bag of culinary...

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Let's Cook Heisenberg Cutting Boards

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I won't tell you what you should and shouldn't use these fine Breaking Bad cutting boards for, but...you might want to stick to "Let's Cook"-ing actual food. Like, how about cleaving some birds for a nice Los Pollos Hermanos...

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Breaking Bad Blue Glass Meth Candy

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Let's preface this pimp of Danilo Buendia's Breaking Bad Blue Glass Meth Rock Candy with the obvious: rock candy is pretty easy to make oneself. Even Blue Glass rock candy. Certainly easier than Blue Glass meth, and probably...

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Cult TV Show Chuck Taylors

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Dexter, Walter White, Jesse Pinkman, Rick Grimes, Ron F**king Swanson, they already hold a place close to our hearts. Thanks to the design maestros at Tauntr.com, so too can they hold a place close to our corns, callouses...