The Snacking Dead: A Parody in a Cookbook
I'm not sure whose poor planning skills decided The Snacking Dead: A Parody in a Cookbook should be released after the October 13th Season 4 opener of The Walking Dead, thus eliminating all of its potential profits from themed premiere parties, but whatever. I don't get a cut regardless of when the guide to meal zombification comes out, so I guess the only reason I mention it at all is that I like to bitch and point out others' stupidity and be a general curmudgeon. Just like everyone else on the Internet.
The Snacking Dead stitches together recipes, tips for turning out a terrific meal even when Zompoc is imminent, and "a love story that will send ripples down your spine." Yeah, a big WTF? from me on that last bit too. Some of the recipes apply the cookbook's stated parody to their dishes' names, such as Sweetish Fleshballs, Crawldaddy Etouffe Toasts, and Gratuitous Violence Jello Mold (awesome!), while others attack the dishes' execution. Like that photograph of a calzone oozing blue cheese in a way reminiscent enough of pus and bile that it makes me never want to eat a calzone again. Damn you, zombies and zombie pop culture fanatics! Sniff. Cheese-and-meat-stuffed bread used to be my favorite method of carbo-loading!
The largely snack-themed cookbook includes 50 recipes. Hopefully one of them will be a bean dip that makes humans smell and taste undesirable to zombies in the same way bean dip makes humans smell and taste undesirable to other humans.