The Big Bad Pizza Wheel
And when not using it to slash through pepperoni and mozzerella, you can also carry the Big Bad Pizza Wheel as a self-defense weapon, or dangle it from the ceiling to practice your most excellently dangerous one-handed rings routine. Suck it, Chinese gymnasts!
The slick silver pizza cutter has a massive free-running roller blade that's sharpened on both sides for effortless splicing of everything from flat bread to pastry dough to America's most favorite Italian creation (tied with Ferraris and Monica Bellucci, or course). The open circular design allows for an ergonomic handle that renders the wheel easier to wield, and distributes blade pressure evenly for simpler and more effective slicing forays.
The Big Bad Pizza Wheel is made by savvy kitchen gadgeteer Rösle. It measures 13.8" in length and 5.5" in width, and disassembles for easy cleaning.