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Size Matters Cake Plate

By: on April 19, 2015
$32.99
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Now you can have your cake and...measure it with a protractor too. This Size Matters plate is perfect for parents looking both to stick it to siblings warring over whose piece of devil's food is bigger, and make the kids learn some valuable math skills prior to partaking in dessert. And no more than a 10-degree slice for you tonight, Little Betsy. I think you're gonna have your mom's hips.

The Size Matters Cake Plate measures a full 360-degrees of spongy iced deliciousness, plus breaks down circular baked goods into 90-degree quarters for easier slice size calculations when the cake cutter is stoned. The platter measures 12" in diameter to accommodate most standard layer, bundt, and round cakes. It is made of ceramic.

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The Whisk Wiper

Sold Out from Amazon »

What is this whiskcraft I see before me? You mean worming my tongue between the wire loops and getting chocolate cake batter all over my face isn't the best way to clean off the whisk when my girlfriend is baking? Nah....

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Dragon Cake Pan

$24.99 from ThinkGeek »

What's going to be harder: getting the cake eggs away from the dragon guarding them, or getting the cake eggs out of the Dragon Cake Pan without destroying them? Those with the ambition and determination of Dany Targaryen...

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Zombie Wedding Cake Topper

$75 from Etsy »

Every groom-to-be gets cold feet at some point, and this zombie wedding cake topper brilliantly summarizes both the worst and best case scenarios that could play out when that happens. Worst Case Scenario: Your feet are...

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Peanut Butter Cup Cake

Discontinued

A gargantuan mail-order Peanut Butter Cup Cake, stacked with double layers of rich chocolate devil's food hugging real peanut butter filling, and then drowned in a dark chocolate shell, is the reason acronyms like OMFG...

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Edible Chocolate Candles

$9.99 from Vat 19 »

Edible Chocolate Candles are for when some little guy...or some little guy's Auntie She-Ra's boyfriend...gets a little too zealous about diving into the double chocolate with chocolate fudge and chocolate cookie crumbles...

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Magisso Perfect Slice Cake Server

$14.99 - $41.23 from Amazon »

Magisso says its curvy Cake Server will "Banish dessert-course anxiety!" Better than Xanax, I wonder? Because it would be really great if I didn't have to give my girlfriend one of mine every time she has to cut up a...

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Eat, Drink & Be Standing Plates

$21.99 from Amazon »

Great Plate gives a hand to anyone with a pile of beef brisket and a freshly cracked beer. A burger and a red cup. A bratwurst and a can of sodie. This nifty champion of standing up while chowing down has a high-rimmed...

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Knorks

$17.99 from Amazon »

Knork: it's the camping-ready Spork's urban, cutting edge cousin. Here to help you slice and pierce your filet mignon with a single hand and a simple rocking motion. Perfect for the knife-renouncing avant-garde, plus...

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Homemade Twinkie Maker

$26.95 from Amazon »

Now that Twinkies have returned to market, a homemade Twinkie maker might not classify as the same magnitude of necessity that it did for about 8 months there. But, still, it's kind of a necessity. You never know when...

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Cookie Monster Pipe

Discontinued

Holy crap, can you imagine how many cookies the Cookie Monster would eat if he were high? Possibly all the cookies in the world. Which in a way would be interesting to witness, but in a bigger way very sad, because then...

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Video Game Junkie Wedding Cake Topper

Discontinued

Is it funny 'cause it's true? The witty, yet unfortunate Video Game Junkie Wedding Cake Topper is a Cynthia Niles custom design, made to order with a jumbo flat screen, and whatever gaming image, console & hand controller...

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KoMo Fidibus 21 Grain Mill

$399.99 from Amazon »

Kamut and spelt and millet, oh my! A little bit of quinoa in my life, a little bit of amaranth by my side. A little bit of barley's all I need, a little bit of sorghum is what I see. Wheat and oats, rice brown and white...