FOODsniffer Food Freshness Tester

By: on October 17, 2016
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You don't need a trained bloodhound or a night of explosive diarrhea and vomiting out the nose to figure out if your food's gone bad anymore. FOODsniffer is a portable "eNose" that will test your meat, poultry, and fish for freshness for you.

Hold the FOODsniffer to a piece of raw animal flesh you either: A) want to consume raw; B) aren't sure how long has sat in your fridge; or C) think smells kinda funny, and Click "Get" on the device's accompanying app. This launches a bio-organic test to measure raw meat gas levels and analyze the results (it takes just a few seconds.) Results are sent via Bluetooth to iPhone or Android phones or tablets, reading as follows:

  • Green. Good to gorge! You can even eat it raw!
  • Yellow. OK to eat, but needs some heat. Follow standard cooking instructions.
  • Red. Spoiled. Throw it out. Demand a refund. Or eat it and lose 8 pounds in 24 hours, plus pay back your girlfriend for letting that friend of hers who smells like patchouli and sweaty TOMS shoes into your living room. That stuff is like the Seinfeld B.O. car! It's never coming out of the couch!

I'm not sure even I would have thought to link rotten, off-gassing raw meat and sex, so cheers to the FOODsniffer promo video for not only making it happen, but coming on to me with a solid 2 minutes of warnings about spreading spoilt legs and FOODsniffing out your fish to make sure it's fresh enough to touch your lips. Check it out.

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