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Tongue Chair

By: on June 09, 2012
  • Tongue Chair
  • Tongue Chair

If it's possible to feel sorry for a chair, I feel sorry for the Tongue Chair. Sure, he's living the life when empty. People see him and grin, chuckle, momentarily forget they have three quarterly reports due in 10 minutes and their wife is probably cheating on them with the stay-at-home dad two blocks over. But what about when someone sits down? That poor SOB. I mean, when I eat something that makes me want to projectile vomit, I say it tastes like hot buttered ass. Thankfully though, I don't actually know how accurate this statement is. Can't say the same for the Tongue Chair. Even the heavy duty marine-grade vinyl his taste buds are made out of can't possibly diminish the ick and tang of gluteal cheeks and crack. As much as my job sucks, and as much as I'm dreading the legal repercussions of body slamming Mr. Mom when I see him at the playground on Sunday, I can at least be thankful I'm not living my life as a glorified ass cushion. Huh. Thanks Tongue Chair. That's the second time today you've made me smile.

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Wearable Chairless Chair

By: Noonee »

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Emperor 1510 Workstation

$5,950 from MWE Lab »

The pinnacle of functionality and comfort and it looks like a scorpion? At nearly $6,000, the Emperor 1510 workstation may require a CEO-sized wallet for purchase, but given that owning one may actually make me want...

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$368.93 from Amazon »

They call it the Chill Sack only to avoid the lawyers' C&D letter or profit-sharing demands from a major corporation. But you can go ahead and call this giant 8-foot bean bag chair built for two (or three!) like it is:...

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$81.99 from Amazon »

This folding beach chair and roller cart has it all: room for your gear and room for your rear. Fishermen, beachgoers, and festival regulars can haul their blankets, coolers, and other outing necessities (i.e., fiber...

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The Elysium Chair is the result of an equation defining posture and gravitational force. I think that's the math geek way of saying it's reeeeeeeal comfortable. So comfortable, it will simulate weightlessness when you...

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Skull Armchair

By: Harow »

Another supervillain yahtzee! This black skull armchair was the one prop missing from my master plan to raise an army of babies and eliminate all cats and bike lanes from my township! The only downside is that it does...

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Lamzac Hangout

$79 from Fatboy »

The Lamzac Hangout is a DIY cloud. Except made of solid nylon ripstop so you won't go crashing thousands of feet to the earth when you lie down on one. And also minus the ice crystals. Unless you decide to unfurl a Lamzac...

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Muista Fidget Chair

$180 - $340 from Muista Chair »

Muista isn't a desk chair just for fidgeters, but the antsy and unfocused will probably be the first to appreciate its backless, rocking design, bouncy, bouncy rungs, and curved, saddle-esque seat. Deemed an "evolved...

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Darth Vader Chair

$64.61 from Amazon »

Awww, man. The Darth Vader chair is exactly what I've been looking for to replace my busted Xbox lounger (note: some chairs are not meant to be used as trampolines when you get excited during CS. RIP my faux leather friend.)...

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MANET French Fry Easy Chair

$1,756 from MANET »

MANET says, "Sitting can be playful," which is all the reason I need to buy one of their order-o'-fries-looking Easy Chairs. To prove to my girlfriend that I'm not just lounging around on my ass, I'm being playful....

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$19,500 from Blackman Cruz »

The Urchin Bean Bag Chair. Just in case your BDSM bordello is missing a touch of magic from the sea. Designed by Ursula Blackman Cruz, this leather-upholstered lounger is certainly a standout in home decor. Some might...

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Someone please tell me this is the new proposed design for airplane seats. The Cocon is an armchair with an integrated sleeping bag. Designed by Celine Merhand and Anais Morel of Les M, the piece endeavors initiate "maximum...