86

Tetris Cushions

By: on June 20, 2012
$248
from
Check It Out

Sometimes when I zone out at my computer or when a boring person is talking to me I see tetrominoes falling and sliding into perfect, explosion-of-Tetris-bonus-points rows of 4. And sometimes when I'm feeling jolly I open-mouth hum one of my 3 choices of Tetris digital theme music. I also do this, along with my famed "Jiggly Jell-O Foot" walk, when a character exhibiting questionable behaviors begins to approach me on the street, and I want him to believe I am at least as disturbed as he is. But perhaps buying a set of Tetris Cushions is too much?

A handcrafted set of Tetris Cushions begins as raw textured cotton livin' the life in a smoke- and pet-free environment. Once snipped and sewn into 7 tetronimoes of varying colors, pillow casings are stuffed with polyester and stacked on chairs and gamer's lounges, or aligned on couches and benches in a perfect, 10-block row. Or not. Whywhywhy didn't Etsy vendor Star Gallery make a Tetris with her arrangement in the photo? Every time I catch sight of that gaping hole four in from the right I have to grit my teeth and look away.

Cushion sizes vary, with the longest (light blue "I") measuring 23.5". All are 6" thick.

Would you like to know some more things about Tetris without taking the time to visit Wikipedia?

  • Tetris was invented by Russian Alexey Pajitnov, and is a mashup of "tetra", a Russian numerical term, and "tennis", the dude's favorite sport.
  • Tetris Music A is a permutation of a Russian folk song called "Korobeiniki", and has been covered by at least 5 American and European bands, as well as arranged for the pipe organ.
  • Playing Tetris only 30 minutes a day for 3 months has been shown to boost brain functions, such as critical thinking, reasoning, language, and processing.
  • The Russian State retained the rights to--and virtually all profits from--Tetris from the game's debut in 1984 until 1996. At that point, the rights finally reverted to Pajitnov, he founded The Tetris Company, and got to work becoming a well-deserved millionaire.
  • Tetris Swimsuits are hot.

Buy Now

The Purple Bed

$699 - $1,299 from Amazon »

I hope this Purple Bed isn't a People Eater disguised as a mattress. Because it sounds too good to be true. Both soft and firm in all the right spots. Temperature neutral, so it won't absorb heat and make you cold, or...

Buy Now

Punchable USB-Connected Enter Key Pillow

$10.20 from Amazon »

Need to blow off some stress? Just hit Enter. Hard. This USB-connected Enter Key Pillow redefines what it means to punch a QWERTY key. In the best, best possible way. Hook the oversized, tetromino-style pillow into a...

Check it out

iNyx - Self-Contained-Bedroom Bed

$9,999 from iNyx »

January 2017 Update: iNyx has now developed its own website. At printing, the online ordering system linked to an iNyx IndieGoGo crowdfunding page here....

Check it out

Smartduvet Breeze Heat & Cool Self-Making Bed

$199 from Smartduvet »

The Smartduvet self-making bed - no, really. The bed makes itself. Just watch. And that's old news. Smartduvet is now launching a next generation of their smart bedding, the Breeze, that adds dual-zone climate control...

Check it out

Arcade Sofa

By: Harow »

1991 brought Street Fighter II. 2017 brings the Street Fighter II Arcade Sofa. Relive your 90s glory playing the game...and then maybe get a different type of game on...on it....

Check it out

Cloud Levitating Sofa

Though only a concept product--and one that debuted a few years ago--the Cloud Levitating Sofa remains maybe the coolest idea for and aesthetic execution of a couch ever. So I was thinking maybe one of you entrepreneurial...

Buy Now

Sex Positions You Never Thought Possible (NSFW)

$39.98 from Amazon »

Remember that one time you let some chick drag you to hot yoga because she too was hot and you wanted to see her do bendy things in spandex pants, but then you ended up spending the whole class lying on your back trying...

Check it out

The Harambed

It's called The Harambed. Lucid Mattress says it's the bed of your memes. And I know if you've been meming at all over the past year, you've been meming about Harambe, haven't you? Well put on your PJs and snuggle in...

Check it out

Zerobody Anti-Gravity Bed

The Zerobody is a sensory deprivation float tank that removes the one major P in the A side effect of floating: getting wet. (True, drowning is kind of a pain too, but most of these tanks have only about a foot of water...

Check it out

The Bird's Nest Bed

The Bird's Nest Bed can accommodate up to 16 people at once. Take note swingers, Mormons, women undergoing IVF treatments, and the Duggar family! The giant basin of comfort was brainstormed and brought to life by O*GE...

Check it out

HiCan - The Never Leave Your Bed Bed

$55k from hi can »

Italian in both slick aesthetics and siesta-time concept, I exaggerate not when I say the HiCan high fidelity canopy bed will persuade its occupants never to leave its ultra-modern, four-poster confines. HiCan designer...

Buy Now

Acid Trip Pillow

$28.80 from Amazon »

The actual name of this product is Moonlight Pillow. Really? Has the moon been eating Skittles? Did it swallow a gay pride parade? Because the moon I look at has certainly never gleamed the entire Roy G Biv rainbow. Except...