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Squatty Potty Unicorn Gold Toilet Spray

By: on January 18, 2017
$9.99 - $14.99
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For all the ladies out there who want a unicorn. And the ones who want pure gold. And especially those who claim their shit don't stink. Now you can have it all. From proper posture poop stool maker Squatty Potty comes the ultimate gift for Valentine's Day: Unicorn Gold Toilet Spray.

Even cooler than the science of matches, fans, and Febreze for dousing out the stench of your doodies is the science of real gold and essential oil barriers blocking it from entering the room in the first place. Squatty Potty says Unicorn Gold's 100% colloidal gold nano-particles attract and kill odors on contact, both inside the bowl and above the water's surface. And since oil and water don't mix, when you spritz your Tropical Dropsicle into the bowl before you go, the natural, non-toxic oils in the spray will linger at the surface, creating a shield between what plops below and what sniffs and gags and asks why your ass can't be fake news when they come into the bathroom after you.

Unicorn Gold comes in 2- or 4-ounce bottles and 5 subversive scents: Citrus Squeeze; Mystic Forest; Tropical Dropsicle; Fruity Booty; and Pinch of Vanilla. The 2-ouncers are good for 200 trips to the throne, and the 4-ouncers 400.

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Dude. When I saw the name "Spray the Bitch Away" for this bottle of aromatherapy perfume I thought it was for men with mean wives and girlfriends, or crazy exes. I thought it would be the perfect Anti-Valentine's Day...

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