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Dexter Blood Spattered Coasters

By: on December 20, 2011
  • Dexter Blood Spattered Coasters
  • Dexter Blood Spattered Coasters
  • Dexter Blood Spattered Coasters
  • Dexter Blood Spattered Coasters
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I have to admit, I don't watch Dexter. But, I know he's a serial killer by day and a funeral home director by night. Wait... maybe I have that reversed and confused. It's Michael Anthony Hall at least right? Wait... Uh, maybe someone else should write this one.

One thing is certain, mixing fake blood with your drink is always a good idea. It makes you glad you're not drinking the blood every time you take a sip. What better way to make your drink taste better than to be able to stare at what you don't have to drink? And glass coasters seem like a great idea. Setting glass on glass is always a great thing. You can just set your glass down as hard as you please and not worry.

I guess these are mainly for fans of Dexter.

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Flayed Flesh Garters

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Take peek-a-boo garters to the next level: peek-a-boo blood vessels and layers of muscle tissue, courtesy of open-wound prostheses and stocking accoutrements from Etsy's Meaghan O'Keefe. A pair of unpainted latex prostheses...

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Stranger Things Eleven Bleeding Nose Candle

$39.69 from Firebox.com »

This is an Eleven Bleeding Nose Candle. If you've seen stranger things - say, Taxidermy Animal Drones or Edible Anus Chocolates - it probably won't bother you. And if you've seen Stranger Things, you'll probably love it....

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Melting Bloody Hand Candle

$35 from Etsy »

Now here's a bloody handy gift for Halloween. Bryan Lawrence makes these terrifically creepy candles, you guessed it, by hand, using flesh-colored wax for the outer layers of their fingers and palms, and blood-red on...

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Cereal Killer Bowl

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Decimate the Froot Loops, eradicate the Frosted Flakes, eliminate all traces of Trix with the Cereal Killer Bowl. Those Charms may be Lucky before the box is opened, but once once they hit your Dexter-approved bowl, it's...

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Face Mask Drink Coasters

$17 from Amazon »

Paladone's Face Mask Drink Coasters are a party multi-tool. Use them old school, to hold your sweaty drink so you don't f*ck up the table. Use them new school, as a frisbee projectile to pelt your friend Cornelius, or...

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Mistaken Lyrics Coasters

$25 - $30 from Amazon »

We've all done it. We've all badgered someone else for doing it. And really, song lyrics misheard, mistaken, and butchered are almost always more fun than what the artists are actually singing anyway....

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NFL Football Teams' Greatest Plays Slate Coasters

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These football plays will go down in history as their NFL teams' greatest, and the slate coasters they're printed on will go down on your table as a barrier between your fine oak and your sweaty can of Bud. The 4-deep...

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Tactical Bleeding Zombie Target

$89.95 from Zombie Industries »

Target practice with human targets seems so cruel (although practical since most of the time it's other people that are getting shot). Why not practice drilling holes in things that are already dead and will probably...

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Unzipped Flesh Kit

$4.35 from Amazon »

One way to make others jump out of their skin is to jump out of yours. This Unzipped Flesh look requires some legwork and talent to pull off, but look at the striking levels of gruesomeness and morbidity one can achieve...

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The CouchCoaster

$19.95 from CouchCoaster »

The CouchCoaster: Because you could throw your back out reaching all the way to the coffee table to get your beer....

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Carbon Fiber Race Track Drink Coaster Set

$59.99 from Amazon »

These Carbon Fiber Race Track Drink Coasters are light, fast, and slick. Which is exactly what I myself am going to be long about the 6th beer I set on one of them this 4th of July weekend....

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Don't F*ck Up the Table Coasters

$24.99 from Amazon »

No reason to mince words when it comes to protecting the 300-pound cherry wood table you just bought off Craigslist. Don't fuck up the table, Cornelius! It's a fine piece of furniture that deserves better than a surface...