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Dog Overalls

By: on April 09, 2013
$39.95 - $79.99
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The list of items people inexplicably buy for their pets just keeps getting longer. I can't imagine any dog--even a neutered dog--forcibly suited up in a pair of Hurtta's canine overalls not spending every second thereafter trying desperately to gnaw them off his being. Even if it means taking a leg off in the process.

Fittingly made of waterproof but breathable Houndtex material, Hurtta outdoor overalls for they of four legs and fur endeavor to keep pets clear of rain and dirt. Made specifically with long-haired dogs in mind, the resilient top coat protects au naturel coats during walks, hikes, and possibly roll-arounds in mud and other animals' shit so that owners don't have to decide between bathing their dogs more often than is healthy or accepting cohabitation with the smell of must, muck, mud, and other animals' shit.

Overalls have adjustable waists, necklines, and sleeves so that dogs don't feel constricted wearing them, though I think I speak for all men when I say All clothes are constricting. I don't care how comfortable or soft or breathable or light they claim to be, when given the choice between clothes and no clothes, we're going to pick no clothes. It's one of the 25 things we envy most about dogs, right after being able to lick women without reprimand, pee at will in public, and catch a frisbee between their teeth.

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Shed Defender Dog Onesie

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Will zipping your dog into a Shed Defender make him look like a canine fool? Sure. But no more so than putting him in pet samurai armor or an AT-AT costume for your personal viewing pleasure. And while the latter have...

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Method Raincoat Sweatshirt

$99 - $109 from MINIM Gear »

What's the Method? Add 1 part sweatshirt, 1 part raincoat, and 3 parts 21st century textile hocus pocus to a pot, and simmer until soft, cozy, and hydrophobic. MINIM Gear is crowdfunding their Method pullovers and zip-ups...

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$65 - $400 from No More Woof »

From the Nordic Society of Invention and Discovery--yes, that's a real society, not one made up by Wes Anderson--comes No More Woof, a device that lifts up the latest technology in micro computing and EEG, and plops it...

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The Dude Dog Sweater

$49 - $59 from Pendleton »

If The Dude were a dog, there's no question this Pendleton sweater is what he'd wear. But. What kind dog would he be while wearing it? St. Bernard? Shar-Pei? Scruffy hound dog?...

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Your Pet's Nose Ring

$284.99 from Etsy »

I'm all for loving your pet...and your pet's nose. But your pet's nose as a ring? Even if the sweet pup or kitty has moved on to taller trees and bigger litter boxes, I'm not sure wearing a sterling silver cast of their...

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Samurai Pet Armor for Cats & Dogs

Don't let that samurai-armored Shiba Inu's smile fool you. The dog is ready for feudal Japan levels of combat. See his samurai sword? Hiding there in his mouth? If I were you I'd armor up, find a weapon, and brace yourself....

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King Bed with Doggie Insert

Discontinued

Jason Barton made a king bed with enough room for the King of the Bed. Which means you'll be sleeping on a cut piece of memory foam stuck in the 23" insert tacked onto its side....

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Wooly Snuffle Foraging & Feeding Mat for Dogs

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No, it's not a scalped Fraggle, it's the Wooly Snuffle Mat. Here to facilitate one and restrain another of your dog's instilled canine instincts with its shag-rug-on-acid pile....

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iFetch Automatic Ball Launcher

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DrySteppers - Raincoats for Your Sneakers

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DrySteppers slip over your sneakers like a cozy shoe raincoat when the only thing worse than when you ask your mama for Adidas and she buys you Zips happens: you buy your own damn Adidas Zebra V2s, and then an angry summer...

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Vollebak Solar Charged Jacket

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Vollebak's Solar Charged Jacket does for Slimer Green what the clothing startup's Baker Miller Naptime Hoodie did for Unicorn Pink: it takes a crazy cut from Roy G Biv, and gives it a highly functional application. Naptime's...

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Wiener Dog Earplugs

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I don't know who let the dogs out, and thanks to these Mimi Pet Nagai Dachshund earplugs I'll never hear anyone else wonder, Who, who, who, who?! again....