Bacon Band Aids
It's a well known fact that placing a cold slab of meat over the source of your boo boos helps with the healing process. Get these, keep them in the freezer, and slab them over your paper cuts, scrapes, burns and bullet wounds you weenies.
These babies come in over a dozen variations of craziness. Sushi, pirate, monster, pickle, jesus. Check out the pics!
I would call Belcampo's Bacons of the World quarterly sampler pork crack, but in this case, I think it would allude to an entirely different--yet still likely very tasty--part of the pig, rather than the addictive, euphoria-inducing...