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Mitten Flask

By: on September 21, 2014
$17.99
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It's only natural that a company called Perpetual Kid would be selling a Mitten Flask. Ahhh, mittens. I lost so many of them sledding during Christmas vacation as a precocious 7-year-old. And ahhh, flasks. I always had my favorite 8 oz. copper standby to hold the Wild Turkey I'd down behind a massive oak tree to warm myself up afterwards.

This winter, Mitten Flasks will make the perfect accompaniments to ski slopes, football games, and long waits at bitter cold bus stops. Have a favorite liquor you want to keep...wait for it...close at hand? Pour a few ounces into the mitten's bladder flask, slip it into the zippered pocket at the palm, and just like that, it's thumbs up, bottoms up.

The flasked mitten in the 2-piece set includes a spill-proof bite valve for booze access without the need to unscrew a cap with yarn-ensconced hands.

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Freedom Flask Liquor Bladder

$24.95 from Amazon »

Ahhh, summertime. 'Tis the season. To be sneaky. The Freedom Flask, in the same spirit of duplicity and cunning as the Nano Hummingbird Spy Camera and the iStash, aids users in their quests to do things they aren't supposed...

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The iFlask

$24.95 from iFlask »

Smokers, you've got your iStash. Drinkers, it's time to get your vice's piece of incognito Apple paraphernalia. In its ubiquitous and thereby discreet glory, the iPhone serves as the facade of subterfuge once again with...

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Fake Tampon Flasks

$19.98 from Amazon »

Mmmm, boy. Who wants an illicit Bloody Mary? I don't care how thirsty I might be at a dry college football game, show, or church service, I don't think I could take a swig of anything out of a tampon. Even a fake tampon...

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Han Solo DL-44 Blaster Flask Prototype

Han shot first. Then Luke threw back 16. Soon you'll be able to do the same. Maybe. if Industries has developed this prototype for a DL-44 Blaster Flask, which might turn into a full-on BlasTech Industries-scale production...

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Smuggle Your Booze Sunscreen Flask

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Summer music festivals, baseball games, and days in the park with the kids are about to get a whole lot jollier. Instead of SPF 30, this innocuous bottle of responsible adult sunscreen contains room for 8 fl. oz. of ABV...

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Kraken Flasks

$85 - $450 from Etsy »

Rejoice ye liquor-sipping non-smokers who thought the Octopus Pipes we featured last month would be cool, if only you inhaled. Kraken Flasks are here to evoke equal reverence from those who enjoy a fine swig of Scotch...

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Stanley Classic Flask

$16 - $39.98 from Amazon »

If Paul Bunyan and Don Draper were sharing some hooch around the campfire, I bet the Stanley Classic Flask in Hammertone Crimson is what they'd use to tip it back. And so would I....

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Bracelet Flask

$18.99 from Amazon »

Fancy fashion designer Cynthia Rowley made a Flask Bracelet that sold for around $225. You can see it on the lady's wrist in image gallery above. But Braced has made a Bracelet Bangle Flask that's waaaay better than Rowley's...

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1 Gallon Stainless Steel Flask

$28.65 from Amazon »

I was doing some soul searching for ways in which I might class up my life, and not 5 minutes in, as if poised to instantly answer my prayers, I locked eyes with this gallon-sized flask. Isn't it beautiful? Brushed finish....

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Portable Travel Bars

$64.95 - $89.95 from Amazon »

It's not quite as nice as opening a briefcase filled with unmarked hundos, but unlocking one of these portable travel bars will still give you pretty good returns. A great gift for men, groomsmen, or the stripper who's...

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VSSL Flask Light

$72.45 from Amazon »

VSSL and its utility tube babies welcome a new bundle of joy to the family. One that will not only hold your booze, but also light your way out of the dive you take into the bushes behind the IHOP after gulping down too...

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Swig & Puff Flask

Sold Out from Amazon »

A swig here, a puff there, a puff here, a Chug! Chug! Chug! there. And none of those big globe or skull ice cubes to get in your way of downing the whiskey when it's flowing freely from this 2-in-1 flask and cigar holder...