Bacon Makin' Alarm Clock
/bacon-makin-alarm-clock-4497.jpg "Bacon Makin' Alarm Clock")
- Gallon of Rendered Duck Fat - $37.00
- Eat What You Want And Die Like A Man: The World's Unhealthiest Cookbook - $5.06
- Bacon Flavored Popcorn - $7.88
- PowerCrisp Microwave Bacon Cooker - $12.59
- 16 oz. Tub of Lard - $15.18
While I'm not entirely sure how I feel about waking up to the sound of oinking, to the idea of waking up to the smell of sweet, smoky carnivore's candy, I say, "Hell. Yeeeahhh." Instructables savant Nelson Yepez has devised a way to make this happen using an old toaster oven, a pair of googly eyes, and every foodie's favorite form of legal crack: bacon.
Bakon is an appliance-alarm clock tag team with a timer that begins cooking strips of edible gold at your preset time, and then upon completion, fills the room with hoggy snorts to make rising and shining less of a daily trauma, and more of a highly anticipated meaty mouth carnival. Yepez designed his homage to swine with college students in mind--kids who have limited space, late nights, often miserable dining options, and an inevitable 10 to 20 pounds to gain anyway. It's also for people who don't get all worked up about stupid things like refrigeration and food poisoning, as obviously even leaving a slab of frozen bacon in a bacteria-friendly space overnight probably isn't FDA-approved.
While no plans for mass production are currently underway, Yepez does provide step-by-step instructions for creating one's own Bakon alarm clock free of charge on the Instructables Website. Required materials include:
- Old toaster oven
- Timer (like those used for Christmas lights)
- High temperature car engine paint
- Pig keychain
- Spare bottle caps for the nose
- 10 gauge solid wire
- Googly eyes
Sweet dreams, happy oinking, and Bacon Appetit!
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