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Fresh Whole Rabbit

By: on January 03, 2012
  • Fresh Whole Rabbit
  • Fresh Whole Rabbit
  • Fresh Whole Rabbit
  • Fresh Whole Rabbit
  • Fresh Whole Rabbit
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Nom, nom, nom. It's Hasenpfeffer meets the next-generation three wolf moon shirt. Your days of gnawing on leathery old rabbit parts that taste like a combination of barnyard and the positive ends of AA batteries are over. These fresh whole rabbits epitomize the concept of communing with nature, making man and beast one, and keeping Montezuma the F out of your GI tract. They're also the perfect gift for the abstaining vampire in your life. Please specify in Comments section of order form whether you would like a cottontail, lop-eared, angora, velveteen, or silly rabbit (infused with authentic Trix essences). Sorry, Jessica breeds are sold out through 2019.

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Cute Ass Animals Underwear

$35 - $56 from Etsy »

Etsy vendor Nichola's Knickerockers, underwear with adorable animal faces strategically sewn across one of my favorite places on earth, are pricey. But to all ladies who often get mistaken for Victoria's Secret models...

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World's Smallest Violin

$12.95 from Amazon »

This is the world's smallest violin, and I'm gonna play it just for you...whiners! So many whiners! At work. On the road. At the checkout line. In my inbox. And the biggest one of all: right there in my bathroom mirror....

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How to Talk to Your Cat About Gun Safety

$10.80 from Amazon »

A must-read for every cat parent! How to Talk to Your Cat About Gun Safety: And Abstinence, Drugs, Satanism, and Other Dangers That Threaten Their Nine Lives consolidates 8 crucial public service pamphlets into a clear...

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Anonymously Send Sh*t

Discontinued

If you know a lot of assholes, you know what it's like to deal with their shit. Now, it's time to return the favor. ShitSenders.com enables the shat upon to send steaming piles of Don't get mad, get even to inconsiderate...

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Frosty the Eunuch Ugly Christmas Sweater

$59.95 from Amazon »

Ugly Christmas Sweater season is here. The days, they have shortened. The temperatures, they have dropped. And the Tipsy Elves, they have knitted. The tacky, silly, funny, and dirty entries in their 2017 sweater line...

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Boob Cube

$9.99 from Amazon »

The Boob Cube is for idiots. And for geniuses. And for idiots who want to convince people they're really geniuses. And for geniuses you want to make feel like idiots. So, yeah, pretty much an ideal gift for any person...

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How to Be a Drug Dealer

$7.99 from Amazon »

If Breaking Bad didn't provide enough of an education, How to Be a Drug Dealer should fill in any gaps left in your study to achieve proficiency and realize success in your pursuit of the street pharmacist profession....

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Playboy: The Complete Centerfolds, 1953-2016

$50.97 from Amazon »

Did you know Marilyn Monroe was the first ever Playboy centerfold? It happened in 1953, and launched what would become Hugh Hefner's iconic Playmate of the Month title and spread. And I didn't know of this before. Clearly...

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Cereal Killer Bowl

Sold Out from Amazon »

Decimate the Froot Loops, eradicate the Frosted Flakes, eliminate all traces of Trix with the Cereal Killer Bowl. Those Charms may be Lucky before the box is opened, but once once they hit your Dexter-approved bowl, it's...

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School of Hard Blocks - Alphabet Blocks for Adults

The School of Hard Blocks is a set of 12 alphabet blocks modeled after the traditional wood children's blocks, but made of concrete. And made for adults who need to learn, ponder, or build up their own ABCs. Adultery....

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Faking It: How to Seem Like a Better Person

$11.46 from Amazon »

...Without Actually Improving Yourself. As a self-help book, Faking It adds a delightful twist: you don't have to journal or meditate or talk about your feelings or change at all to help yourself. You just have to perfect...

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Whiskey River Sarcastic Soaps

$8.95 from Whiskey River »

Whiskey River Soaps are like modern-day Shakespearean comedies. Insightful in reading people. Precise in their social commentary. Charming and funny. And, to complement our 21st century needs, not tl;dr, and serving more...