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Sunday, February 5, 2012
$16 from Etsy »

Behold The Biggest Loser's latest ploy to equate sugar with poison. Big fat fatties of the world, you must face your saccharine skeletons in the closet, your demonic empty calories, and defy them in favor of healthier, whole...

Tuesday, September 13, 2011
$5.98 from Bad Jew BBQ »

If there's one thing that Jews know, it's not barbecue sauce. Nonetheless, we've been given their best effort. Hey, at least it's kosher right? No word on weather the sauce bottle "tips" well for easy pouring....

Monday, September 17, 2012
$14.59 from Firebox.com »

This salt is not suitable for vegetarians. Because it contains worrrrrmsss. Real (used to be) live worms. Sal de Gusano, or Worm Salt sees your claims of authenticity in margarita and tequila shooting endeavors, and raises you a fat wad of ground up agave worms. In addition to the squiggly invertebrates and rock salt, Worm Salt also has a dousing of chili to elevate its intensity and add a mouth-filling...

Thursday, July 19, 2012

We're ampin' up for the Summer 2012 Olympics. Which means the Olympic athletes are ampin' up for their drug tests. So in the spirit of US dominance, and the hope that none of our dominating athletes get busted for doping we...

Saturday, February 18, 2012
$325 from Etsy »

Now when, at the height of an intense Scrabble match, you get stuck with both of the GD Zs, instead of driving yourself insane trying to remember if "ze" and "oz" are approved words, you can simply eat the offending letters...

Thursday, September 6, 2012
$17.50 from Etsy »

The scientific community may have dogged Pluto, but these Solar System Suckers are paying the little outcast the homage he deserves. My Very Educated Mother Just Served Us Nine Pizzas, plus the Sun, all hold a place in the 10-strong collection of lollipop planets with black backs flecked in edible glitter to simulate stars. I know you're all wondering what Uranus tastes like, and though my immediate...

Saturday, August 25, 2012
$34.99 from ThinkGeek »

I don't like the accusatory look on Princess Leia's face as she stands there, one hand on her hip, thrusting a Darth Vader LED-lit Lightsaber ice pop towards me and seemingly saying, "I thought it would be bigger." But the...

Saturday, September 3, 2011
$7.28 from Amazon »

If you're somehow unable to get enough bacon through the 100s of bacon related food products out there, I've got a solution for you. Bacon flavored drink tabs. Now you can wash down that bacon and bacon sandwich with a nice...

Tuesday, September 13, 2011
$6.81 from Amazon »

Nothing burps like bacon... candy. I think this might not be as good for popping into your mouth one after another as sneak attacking an unsuspecting friend by giving him piece casually and seeing what genuine surprise looks...