Novelty

Sriracha Lollipops

$10 from Lollyphile »

Yes, it's the rooster sauce hardened, domed out, and mounted on a stick. Sriracha Lollipops: where cocks become balls. Online 'pop shop Lollyphile has turned everyone's favorite liquid fire into a lickable creation that...

Thanksgiving Popcorn Feast

$34.99 from Amazon »

Well here's one way to appease vegetarians, gluten intolerants, lousy cooks, people with a dish washing aversion, and Orville Redenbacher this Thanksgiving. King of POP has condensed an entire Turkey Day feast into 9...

Get Up and Go Caffeinated Baked Goods

$8.99 - $36 from Get Up and Go »

Get Up and Go baked goods advertise their delivery of caffeine without the coffee. Having consumed several...in the past 11 minutes...I would advertise that, even better, they jack up my motivation and focus without the...

Liquor-Laden Marshmallows

$7.50 from Wondermade »

The marshmallows are termed "Wondermade" because they're purportedly derived from "100% sweet, magic air." Very nice. However, as much as I like things that are sweet and magic, if I am to dole out $7.50 for them, they...

Blast Caffeine Powder

$12.50 from Blast Caffeine »

This stuff is scary. It takes 125 energy drinks to match the caffeine in 1 Blast caffeine. So, if you're finally ready to get off the couch and go outside, this stuff might help. Or, it might kill you. Either way, it's...

Cow Wow Cereal Milk

Sold Out from Amazon »

I never cared much for the milk left at the bottom of the cereal bowl. But I spooned it up anyway because my grandma told me that if I didn't I would get osteoporosis. (I am very happy to report that after years of taking...

Ghost Pepper Jelly

Sold Out from Amazon »

Suzanne says her Ghost Jelly is perfect for your favorite hotty. I think it's perfect for my friend Cornelius' toast, which I will butter and jelly up for him out of kindness, and inform him is smeared with orange marmalade...

Carbonated Sugar

$13.61 from Amazon »

Carbonated sugar. Also known as Popping Sugar. Also known as the shit they use to make Pop Rocks! F stingy, tablespoonful servings for 99 cents, how's about a whole vat of candied mouth explosions? And a mere packet of...

Ketchup Salt

$8.95 from Amazon »

Obviously, I like putting ketchup on burgers and fries. I also kind of like putting ketchup on eggs. And potato chips. Probably I would enjoy it on a Caesar salad as well if it weren't so runny. Oh, why hello Ketchup...

Death Star Lollipops

Sold Out from Etsy »

Death Star Lollipops. An excellent concept. And might I suggest throwing some Pop Rocks in there too during a suck session so they actually explode in your mouth....

Miracle Berry Fruit Tablets

$14.95 from Amazon »

The future is here. These amazing miracle berries are eaten before meals to make the meals taste better. "How?" you ask. By making sour and bitter foods taste sweet. I have tried these and they do work. Don't believe...

Alcohol-Infused Whipped Cream

In the true spirit of the holiday season, here comes a little gift that will make you even more fat and drunk. Whipped Lightning turbocharges ordinary canned whipped cream with 36.5 proof grain alcohol and 12 mostly-tasty-sounding...

Freeze Dried Meat

$38.19 - $288.99 from Amazon »

Japanese earwax magnifiers, freeze dried meat, Today's Special is: weirdness. Now someone take that mannequin's hat off so he'll stop yammering about sharing and being nice to people. Honeyville Rancher's Cut carnivorous...

Caffeinated Baking Sugar

$14.99 from ThinkGeek »

Here is what's going to happen when I give Cornelius pot brownies made with Jacked Up caffeinated baking sugar: first he will say he doesn't feel anything. This will continue for 11 to 17 minutes. Then he will jump out...

Velopresso - Espresso Cart Trike

Put the pedal to the...grinder. The Velopresso, an espresso cart-bicycle (well, tricycle, really) hybrid, takes the concept of generating power through manual labor and removes the practical joke punchline typically associated...

Instant Regret Hot Chili Peanut Butter

$11.29 from Firebox.com »

Hot to the power of hot meets one of the most devastating allergens on the planet. If Instant Regret Peanut Butter doesn't drive you into an immediate convulsive fit, followed by a semi-conscious state of catatonia, Firebox...

Pickle & Bacon Candy Canes

$6.95 - $11.94 from Amazon »

Pickle and bacon candy canes. A good start, indeed, but now we need flavors hamburger, ketchup, and cheddar. And maybe bun, though if the former requests were met, I would be willing to break my Christmas sticks into...

Sugar Cube Skulls

$16 from Etsy »

Behold The Biggest Loser's latest ploy to equate sugar with poison. Big fat fatties of the world, you must face your saccharine skeletons in the closet, your demonic empty calories, and defy them in favor of healthier...

Edible Cocktail Cups

$150 from Loliware »

Pop Quiz, hot shot: What makes the nearly flawless Manhattan even better? A: An edible cup made of bitters. And drinking it without letting the bus drop below 50 mph, of course. Loliware's edible cocktail glasses up the...

Bacon Frosting

$6.12 from Amazon »

It's been two weeks since we last spotlighted a historically unlikely, but--given the current state of global madness--now entirely predictable food staple flavored with bacon. Bust out the red velvet sponge and cream...

Chocolate Covered Jalapenos

Chocolate Covered Jalapenos: for that delectable combination of sweet, and hotter than balls. Fresh, straight-up jalapenos, or a rainbow assortment of sweet peppers, are dipped in taste buds' choice of dark chocolate...

Bad Jew BBQ Sauce

$5.98 from Bad Jew BBQ »

If there's one thing that Jews know, it's not barbecue sauce. Nonetheless, we've been given their best effort. Hey, at least it's kosher right? No word on whether or not the sauce bottle "tips" well for easy pouring....

Homemade Chewing Gum Kit

$10.75 from Amazon »

When I was little, my dad forbade me from chewing watermelon Bubblicious because he said it smelled like vomit. At the time, I was devastated. Watermelon was my favorite flavor of gum, and I had finally achieved the milestone...

Edible Chocolate Scrabble Letters

Sold Out from Etsy »

Now when, at the height of an intense Scrabble match, you get stuck with both of the GD Zs, instead of driving yourself insane trying to remember if "ze" and "oz" are approved words, you can simply eat the offending letters...

Wino Popcorn

$8 - $48 from Populence »

Popcorn and wine. They go together like peanut butter and, uh...french fries? Like something I'd probably try it because I dig both of those things individually and they don't have entirely antagonistic flavors, but I'd...

Eat-A-Bug Cookbook

$14.39 from Amazon »

What are you going to do with all those insects and arthropods and segmented slimers you kill with your Bug-A-Salt shotgun? How about whipping up a batch of Wax Worm Cookies? Mmmmmm, smell those self-regenerative body...

Tower of Sour Candy Urine Samples

We're ampin' up for the Summer 2012 Olympics. Which means the Olympic athletes are ampin' up for their drug tests. So in the spirit of US dominance, and the hope that none of our dominating athletes get busted for doping...

Worm Tequila Salt

$14.59 from Firebox.com »

This salt is not suitable for vegetarians. Because it contains worrrrrmsss. Real (used to be) live worms. Sal de Gusano, or Worm Salt sees your claims of authenticity in margarita and tequila shooting endeavors, and raises...

Solar System Suckers

$17.50 from Etsy »

The scientific community may have dogged Pluto, but these Solar System Suckers are paying the little outcast the homage he deserves. My Very Educated Mother Just Served Us Nine Pizzas, plus the Sun, all hold a place in...

LED Lightsaber Ice Pop Maker

$34.99 from ThinkGeek »

I don't like the accusatory look on Princess Leia's face as she stands there, one hand on her hip, thrusting a Darth Vader LED-lit Lightsaber ice pop towards me and seemingly saying, "I thought it would be bigger." But...

Delicious Bacon Candy

$6.82 from Amazon »

Nothing burps like bacon... candy. I think this might not be as good for popping into your mouth one after another as sneak attacking an unsuspecting friend by giving him piece casually and seeing what genuine surprise...

Effervescent Bacon Drink Tabs

$0.99 from Amazon »

If you're somehow unable to get enough bacon through the 100s of bacon related food products out there, I've got a solution for you. Bacon flavored drink tabs. Now you can wash down that bacon and bacon sandwich with...