56

Exotic Predator Jerky Gift Pack

By: on November 30, 2016
$39.99
Check It Out

Now this is the kind of snake bite I'll take any day: the one where I'm on the delivering end, and the python recipient is covered in teriyaki sauce, kissed with brown sugar, and dried with a touch of liquid smoke. The Exotic Predator Jerky 3-pack follows up its snake appetizer with another reptile for the main course, a bag of Cajun Alligator. And for dessert?

Peppered Mako Shark.

Uhhhh. I'm a pretty big whore for sweets, but F. That. I don't care how jerky-fied they are. There will be no sharks in this house.

The Newport Jerky Company spices, dehydrates, and packages up the meat from over a dozen different animals you'd never find at the 7-Eleven checkout. Their Exotic Predator Jerky Gift Pack includes one bag each* of python, alligator, and mako shark jerky. You can also buy the bags singly, along with other tasty beasts, including alpaca, kangaroo, and snapping turtle.

*Later That Day Update: Thanks to eagle eye Dude reader Cameron S. for pointing out my previous error of stating all 3 bags in the Predator Pack contain 3 ounces of jerky. The shark jerky is indeed a 3-ounce bag, but you'll get 1.75 ounces of gator and 1.5 ounces of python.

Check it out

Beef Jerky Flower Bouquets

Men, say it with diamonds. With chocolate truffles. With roses. Ladies, say it with beef. Jerky. In the shape of flowers for good measure. Because even though nothing will tell your man's belly how you feel more than...

Buy Now

Ziv's Portable Smoker

$119.95 from Amazon »

Ziv likes his fish straight out of the smoker the same night he catches it. Even if he's spending that night in Mother Nature's backyard instead of his own. He created Ziv's Portable Smoker - a cooker box that collapses...

Buy Now

The Shark Buggy

$244.99 from Amazon »

Maclaren's toothy Shark Buggy wins the Best Shark Merch Award for 2017. (The Animatronic Shark Costume took 2016, while 2013, 2014, and 2015 all went to the Sharkini.) Seeing a kid chillin' between the jaws of this delightful...

Check it out

Python Skin Death Trooper Helmet

$3k from ELEMNT »

I think this python skin Death Trooper Helmet solidifies maker ELEMNT's position on Team Dark Side. Their first snaked-out Star Wars replica payed homage to Darth Vader, and was shaped around one of the 1,200 collector's...

Buy Now

Smoke Puck Meat Infusers

$12.12 from Amazon »

They say these smoke pucks pack punch. Right in your meat's kisser! Smaller than a wood or pellet smoker, or even a wood / pellet smoker box that sits under your grill lid, the Steven Raichlen Best of Barbecue Stainless...

Check it out

Sharkini Swimsuit

$120 from Bad Aby Designs »

Sharks are scary. Girls are scary. Gaaahhh! It's the worst hybrid ever! To all Dude Facebook readers who expressed sentiments of peeved off at our posting of a Sharkini photo without information about where to throw wads...

Check it out

Seabreacher Shark X Water Jet

$90k from Seabreacher »

Seabreacher water jets snugly seat two people with exceptional control over their stomachs and bowels for a nautical roller coaster ride of dives, breaches, spins, and respective surface and subsurface speeds of up to...

Check it out

Animatronic Shark Costume

By: VFXLAB »

Seabob, an animatronic shark costume visual effects designers VFXLAB recently took for a test swim in the San Bernardino Doubletree Hotel pool, is many things. Funny, a good prank, and a way for my friend Cornelius to...

Check it out

Country Archer Natural Meat Snacks

$2.75 - $6 from Country Archer »

Country Archer makes meat snacks for those of us who are done with dry, brittle jerky that tastes like nothing but fake smoke and salt, and feels like it's going to puncture our gut when we swallow it. And also for those...

Buy Now

Alligator Beach Towel Anchor Stakes

Sold Out from Amazon »

I don't know if these Beach Towel Anchor Stakes are alligators or crocodiles, but I do know they look ready to take a bite out of some terry cloth, and tell the wind to Blow it! this summer....

Buy Now

Edible Dehydrated Zebra Tarantula

$24.99 from Amazon »

What's that you're eating? Antelope jerky? Pssshh! Amateur. Real men, men with balls as big as their 3 p.m. snack cravings, eat dehydrated zebra tarantulas. Straight from the can....

Buy Now

15-Minute Meat & Vegetable Vacuum Marinator

$89.90 from Amazon »

Not quite as good as tumbling your meat into diamonds, but way better than waiting 12 hours for it to marinate. The Chef's Elite 15-Minute Marinator uses a vacuum system and a (literal) drum roll to (literally) turn your...