The Art of Eating through the Zombie Apocalypse

By: on December 25, 2014
The Art of Eating through the Zombie Apocalypse
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In addition to The Art of Eating through the Zombie Apocalypse can I get one called The Art of Fighting Indigestion through Christmas Day? From my mama's cinnamon rolls and egg casserole at breakfast to the 6-pack of microbrew porters I got from Santy to the beef tenderloin I'm making sure I smoke enough weed now to be hungry for at dinner, I feel like the first Zompoc going down will be one that outbreaks in my stomach.

As for the one that occurs across the world, if the zombies are like my ex-girlfriend Karen they'll strike when our guard is down. When we're chillin', throwing back a few beers, just trying to enjoy a rare day of fun with family and friends without someone yapping in our ears, or worrying about them eating what's between them. In other words, expect the zombies to begin their rampage on New Year's Eve.

At that point we'll be fine for the first week or two, between having gorged consistently during the previous month, and our New Year's resolutions to go on a green juice diet, but by the time the Super Bowl rolls around, even amidst all the hacked limbs and mayhem we're probably going to start getting hungry. And when there's no more takeout, no more 4-course dinners for $10 at Applebee's, and no more aisles jam packed with 18 different kinds of mustard at the grocery store, The Art of Eating through the Zombie Apocalypse will serve as our guide to staying satiated through the era of Z.

This compilation from Lauren Wilson is part cookbook, part culinary filed guide. It combines over 80 recipes with gastronomic survival tips and dozens of diagrams detailing how to scavenger, forage, and improvise your way to nourishment during the bloodiest and most viral of times.

Recipes include Overnight of the Living Dead French Toast, Itís Not Easy Growing Greens Salad, Down & Out Sauerkraut, Honey & Blackberry Mead, Twinkie Trifle, and Apocalypse Nownies.