98

Bizarro Fiction

By: on September 21, 2013
$6.95 - $15.95
Check It Out

Bizarro fiction author Cameron Pierce has won awards for his fantastical, trippy, borderline psychotic tales of what life could be like if we all made better use of our imaginations, and consumed many, many tabs of acid. His bizarro genre encompasses the absurd, the satirical, and especially the grotesque, and Pierce's collection of novels, stories, and poems comprise both an epic journey of disturbing creativity, and one helluva an entertaining freak show. For example:

Ass Goblins of Auschwitz is beautifully described as "Monty Python meets Nazi exploitation in a surreal nightmare." The book's blurb instructs readers to prepare themselves to get "Shit Slaughtered" in a land of black snow run by a group of fascist and gassy aliens called Ass Goblins. The Goblins descend upon their neighboring Kidland, abducting children to subject to sadistic torture, such as eating other kids' skin and making bicycles and sex dolls out of their dead bodies. A pair of conjoined twin brothers plot their escape and endeavor to save the rest of the prisoners from mutation into goblin-child hybrids.

In Die You Doughnut Bastards, Pierce pits amputees, lonely young people, and talking animals against that bitch Mother Nature. An expecting couple must grapple with their typewriter made of fetuses, while a demonic loner goes to a birthday party in Hell. Vegetarian narwhals find themselves for sale at the supermarket and the zombie doughnuts, they are rising up.

Additional Pierce titles include Lost in Cat Brain Land, Gargoyle Girls of Spider Island, and Abortion Arcade.

Other writers also hold court in the bizarro fiction sphere, such as Carlton Mellick III, author of Christmas on Crack, The Haunted Vagina, and The Baby Jesus Butt Plug, and Mykle Hansen, author of Rampaging Fuckers of Everything on the Crazy Shitting Planet of the Vomit Atmosphere. Wow. Finally some writes who speak my language. Where were these guys during AP English?

Thanks to Leeford W. for the Dude Product Tip.

Buy Now

Cereal Killer Bowl

$24 from Amazon »

Decimate the Froot Loops, eradicate the Frosted Flakes, eliminate all traces of Trix with the Cereal Killer Bowl. Those Charms may be Lucky before the box is opened, but once once they hit your Dexter-approved bowl, it's...

Buy Now

How to Talk to Your Cat About Gun Safety

$10.15 from Amazon »

A must-read for every cat parent! How to Talk to Your Cat About Gun Safety: And Abstinence, Drugs, Satanism, and Other Dangers That Threaten Their Nine Lives consolidates 8 crucial public service pamphlets into a clear...

Check it out

School of Hard Blocks - Alphabet Blocks for Adults

The School of Hard Blocks is a set of 12 alphabet blocks modeled after the traditional wood children's blocks, but made of concrete. And made for adults who need to learn, ponder, or build up their own ABCs. Adultery....

Buy Now

Faking It: How to Seem Like a Better Person

$11.66 from Amazon »

...Without Actually Improving Yourself. As a self-help book, Faking It adds a delightful twist: you don't have to journal or meditate or talk about your feelings or change at all to help yourself. You just have to perfect...

Check it out

Whiskey River Sarcastic Soaps

$8.95 from Whiskey River »

Whiskey River Soaps are like modern-day Shakespearean comedies. Insightful in reading people. Precise in their social commentary. Charming and funny. And, to complement our 21st century needs, not tl;dr, and serving more...

Buy Now

Boob Cube

$9.50 from Amazon »

The Boob Cube is for idiots. And for geniuses. And for idiots who want to convince people they're really geniuses. And for geniuses you want to make feel like idiots. So, yeah, pretty much an ideal gift for any person...

Check it out

Anonymously Send Sh*t

Discontinued

If you know a lot of assholes, you know what it's like to deal with their shit. Now, it's time to return the favor. ShitSenders.com enables the shat upon to send steaming piles of Don't get mad, get even to inconsiderate...

Buy Now

The Complaint Department Grenade Sign

$9.99 from Amazon »

When I saw this "Complaint Department" sign with a "Please take a number" directive pointing right at the pin of a grenade, I first assumed it was meant for the office. I know my boss would sure like to have one....

Buy Now

Do Your Park Magnets

$12 from Amazon »

We've seen the mostly innocuous You Suck at Parking business cards. And also the more permanent, and thereby more controversial, I Park Like an Idiot bumper stickers. Here we have a midpoint between the two: a-hole parking...

Check it out

What Do You Meme? Game

Elliot Tebele, overlord of the famed Instagram account Fuckjerry, has made a pretty natural transition with What Do You Meme? His images and commentary translate seamlessly from work day slacking reading material on the...

Buy Now

A is for Anus: The Alphabet (For Adults)

$9.99 from Amazon »

This alphabet isn't adult just because A is for Anus, but also because of the accompanying anatomical representation author Max Willy has selected to make sure everyone knows what an anus is. Stick out your pointer finger...

Check it out

You Suck At Parking Business Cards

$18.95 from Zazzle »

Personally, I think people should be thrown in jail for bad parking. Bad parkers fall into 2 groups... The first, just aren't mentally capable of parking well. And the second just don't give a shit. If jail isn't an option...