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Alien Next Door

By: on November 05, 2015
$12.04
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Here we have the script for the next sequel in the Alien franchise, tentatively titled Alien: Domestication. OK, not quite. It's actually a new satire from artist Joey Spiotto--the kind that's kind of for kids, kind of for adults, and definitely for all Alien fans. The book's loose storyline follows an Alien that comes to Earth and must learn to fit in on a planet full of humans and cats. How does he do it? By becoming the Alien Next Door. The friendly neighbor who keeps his house spic 'n' span, bakes his buddies pies, and never forgets to floss. He's also pretty good with an electric razor.

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Aliens M41A Pulse Rifle - Fully Functional

$1,999 from Bonanza »

You look at the replica M41A Pulse Rifle from Aliens, its fully adjustable metal stock and removable magazine, and wonder, Is it real? It looks real. It's the right shape. It's...huge...definitely the right size. It moves...

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Predator Helmet

$780 - $1,180 from NLO Moto »

When Batman got a helmet it made Predator all jealous so he whined to NLO Moto, "WTF man? First he gets the higher budget movies and legitimate actors and then DC rejects my idea for a The Dark Knight v. Predator crossover...

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Remarkable Books - Beautiful & Historic Works

$27 from Amazon »

In addition to stirring artwork and hand-scribed text, Remarkable Books: The World's Most Beautiful and Historic Works also has Gift for Dad written all over the pages it has extracted from the tomes of history. A permanent...

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World's Smallest Violin

$37.36 from Amazon »

This is the world's smallest violin, and I'm gonna play it just for you...whiners! So many whiners! At work. On the road. At the checkout line. In my inbox. And the biggest one of all: right there in my bathroom mirror....

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DC & Marvel Comics Suits

$169.99 - $349.99 from Fun.com Suits »

Holy Marvel of Washington DC, Batman! They made a suit out of you! As teased in a preview a couple weeks ago, Fun.com is releasing a line of men's (funny / monkey?) business suits in tribute to your favorite superheroes...

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How to Talk to Your Cat About Gun Safety

$10.80 from Amazon »

A must-read for every cat parent! How to Talk to Your Cat About Gun Safety: And Abstinence, Drugs, Satanism, and Other Dangers That Threaten Their Nine Lives consolidates 8 crucial public service pamphlets into a clear...

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Frosty the Eunuch Ugly Christmas Sweater

Sold Out from Amazon »

Ugly Christmas Sweater season is here. The days, they have shortened. The temperatures, they have dropped. And the Tipsy Elves, they have knitted. The tacky, silly, funny, and dirty entries in their 2017 sweater line...

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Anonymously Send Sh*t

Discontinued

If you know a lot of assholes, you know what it's like to deal with their shit. Now, it's time to return the favor. ShitSenders.com enables the shat upon to send steaming piles of Don't get mad, get even to inconsiderate...

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Boob Cube

Sold Out from Amazon »

The Boob Cube is for idiots. And for geniuses. And for idiots who want to convince people they're really geniuses. And for geniuses you want to make feel like idiots. So, yeah, pretty much an ideal gift for any person...

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Alien Mind Control Mask

$109.99 from The Horror Dome »

Oh what I would give to wear this Alien Mind Control mask to work. I'd just ride the lobby elevator up and down all day long, standing there ominously to greet, and soil the pants of, everyone who gets on. I'm almost...

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How to Be a Drug Dealer

$7.99 from Amazon »

If Breaking Bad didn't provide enough of an education, How to Be a Drug Dealer should fill in any gaps left in your study to achieve proficiency and realize success in your pursuit of the street pharmacist profession....

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Cereal Killer Bowl

$26 from Amazon »

Decimate the Froot Loops, eradicate the Frosted Flakes, eliminate all traces of Trix with the Cereal Killer Bowl. Those Charms may be Lucky before the box is opened, but once once they hit your Dexter-approved bowl, it's...