A Book of Beards
/a-book-of-beards-6154.jpg "A Book of Beards")
- Glossy Mustached & Beard Wax - $22.40
- Another Book of Beards - $10.17
- The Facial Hair Handbook - $14.95
- Bluebeards Original Beard Wash - $14.00
- Beard & Mustache Coloring Book - $11.95
Author Justin James Muir deems the 86 follicular face thatches crawling through the pages of his A Book of Beards "stunning." Though I may have chosen a more manly descriptor, such as bomb, boss, or Zangief, I would have to agree with the sentiment. The compilation may be the slickest, most aesthetically captivating F You to razors ever created. And the bulk of its proceeds are going to the man on the cover, Mike, a good friend of Muir's who has been (successfully) battling testicular cancer and its repercussions since 2011. Remaining profits will benefit the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society, a nod to the disease Muir's twin brother ultimately conquered after a diagnosis in 1997.
Along with the gallery of awe-inspiring wooly growths, Muir includes 18 anecdotes and musings on beards, including the comparison of a man's facial hair to a tree's trunk rings. "Long or short, thick or thin, unkempt or cropped," he notes, "the hair on a man's chin can say a lot about the time he has spent on this planet."
/tooletries-beard-scrubber-62230.jpg?mode=crop "Tooletries Beard Scrubber")
Tooletries Beard Scrubber
New year, new beard? Or maybe, new year, old beard you've promised your wife you'll put some effort into cleaning up? (Because she's tired of you "walking around looking like Bluto from Popeye after he's eaten a dozen...
/The-357-Magnum-Gun-Hair-Dryer-874.jpg?mode=crop "The 357 Magnum Gun Hair Dryer")
The 357 Magnum Gun Hair Dryer
A real "blast" from the past. In a clever display of grooming irony, users shoot this vintage 357 Magnum Hair Dryer at their heads to avoid committing style suicide. We can see it now, the biggest public service campaign...
/the-beard-bro-beard-shaping-20644.jpg?mode=crop "The Beard Bro Beard-Shaping Tool")
The Beard Bro Beard-Shaping Tool
Men, are you tired of spending precious minutes in the morning grooming and edging your perfect specimen of manliness (well, the one on your face anyway) only to end up looking like your 6-year-old shaved you after you...
Brazilian Back Male Hair Removal System
Men, removing unwanted back hair is now as easy as putting on a coat! And if you don't believe me, just ask Wilmer Valderrama, who appears to be as big of a Brazilian Back male hair eradicating system fan as he does to...
Hairy Chest Sweater
What sucks is that you're either blessed with a dense thatch of chest hair or you're not. There's no cultivating it, no sprinkling of fertilizer that will encourage it to grow. The only legitimate option for those bereft...
/the-original-pussycat-patch-33407.jpg?mode=crop "The Original Pussycat Patch Crotch Wigs (NSFW)")
The Original Pussycat Patch Crotch Wigs (NSFW)
Did you know crotch wigs have an official name besides "crotch wigs?" According to crotch wig maker The Original Pussycat Patch, they're called "merkins." Merkins! It sounds like a new breed of little creatures created...
/morninghead-mans-5second-hairstylist-2490.jpg?mode=crop "Morninghead: Man's 5-Second Hairstylist")
Morninghead: Man's 5-Second Hairstylist
Sometimes, the last thing you want to wake up to is morning head. It's unruly and it's hard to handle, yet it must be calmed before leaving the house. It especially must be calmed before facing your ball buster of a boss...
/whisker-dam-mustache-protector-58610.jpg?mode=crop "Whisker Dam Mustache Protector")
Whisker Dam Mustache Protector
They say it's like an umbrella for your face. And also that it's the best dam invention for keeping your whiskers dry. The Whisker Dam sits over a pint of beer (or milk, or triple mocha with extra whipped cream) and prevents...
/the-weirdest-mens-grooming-33061.jpg?mode=crop "The Weirdest Men's Grooming Products That Actually Work")
The Weirdest Men's Grooming Products That Actually Work
Let's be clear: these so-called "weirdest men's grooming products" wouldn't make a single lady flinch. They could never touch the bizarre and freakish tinctures and tools women use to groom and beautify themselves (see:...
The Single Handed Barber
It's cuttin' it close, but order now and your Single Handed Barber, a DIY electric hair trimmer for short cuts, may arrive just in time for Father's Day. Cuttin' it close. Ha! Hahaha! Pun. Intended. Puns and I share the...
/Kids-Ultimate-Bearded-Beanie-983.jpg?mode=crop "Kids Ultimate Bearded Beanie")
Kids Ultimate Bearded Beanie
The bearded beanie is a perfect way to keep your kid warm and make him look like he has a beard. I have a feeling that it is also a great way to torment your kid, give him an itchy face, and possibly have lasting effects...
/beard-grow-xl-facial-hair-20369.jpg "Beard Grow XL Facial Hair Supplement")
Beard Grow XL Facial Hair Supplement
Snake oil? No Way! Beard Grow XL isn't oil at all. It's pills! Ninety little capsules whose daily dose claims to carry the coveted effect of a full and glorious facial bush that's sure to rival the one on Santa himself...