Bob Ross Finger Puppet
Imagine the joy of owning a finger puppet of the man who taught us the joy of painting. That's a serious amount of joy. I got that joy, joy, joy, joy, down in my heart. Where? God, I'm in such a great mood thanks to this finger pup.
Furry Friend Bucket Hat
If the Cookie Monster had a baby with Barkley...or just, like, became a piece of hybrid merch at the hands of a Sesame Street fanatic...this Furry Friend Bucket Hat could easily be the result. Made with an abundance of...
You Is Fine Bears
Do you love her? Eh. Is she cute? Heh. She is way beyond cute, dude. Hot? HOT. Like... Hotter than Olivia Munn all tatted up and devouring a chili dog in a Xena costume? Uh... Basically every time I see her all I can...
Beer Puppeteer - Human Puppet Drinking Game
The Beer Puppeteer is a Dutch drinking game. Yes, that's right. The same people who think it's a good idea to ride bicycles everywhere and eat herring also think it's a good idea to turn yourself into a human puppet...
Undead Teds - Your Bear, Zombified
Whoa. I thought the scariest thing I'd ever seen was a real live British boy who looks like Chucky, but Undead Teds have staged a coup and now reign supreme. Even if they don't have the same bone-chilling, soprano accent...
Feisty Pets
These Feisty Pets are the perfect way to teach your kids about the true nature of animals. All cuddly puppy and squishy bear and magical unicorn at first sight, but get too close and...Rrrrrawwwrrr! Back the F off, son...
Randimals Stuffed Animals
Hark! It's a Hork! Randimals Stuffed Animals are huggable mashups of our finest furry, feathered, scaled, and cartilaginous friends. Above you see the Randimals Hork, one possible outcome of a horse mated with a shark...
Life-Size Minecraft Creeper
Personally, I'd be opposed to cuddling with one of these Creeper SOBs, but maybe Minecraft fans who have better reconciled the differences between pixelated computer screen graphics and real life will appreciate the whimsy...
Blobfish Plush
Snuggle up with God's ugliest creature. It's true. The blobfish wins all the Most Horrific Beast on the Planet contests, and as I've previously mentioned here, I think it might be my curse to be reincarnated as one. Legend...
Things That Make You Go Awww
While cute 'n' cuddly 'n' precious isn't normally my jam around here, over the years I have found some products that are more awww-inspiring than awe-inspiring. I figured, for your guilty pleasure of the evening, I'd...
Alfred the Giant Crochet Octopus
I can't tell exactly how giant Alfred the Giant Crochet Octopus is, but if the evidence in the image gallery above is any indication, he appears to be the equivalent of 1 x standard lady who has not yet mastered the art...
Cute but Cantankerous: Animal Gifts with a Bite
None of the animals that made my cute but cantankerous animal gift list are dogs, but I think we can still talk in terms of bark versus bite when discussing just how ill-tempered and aggressive these selections are...
Unneutered Cat Stuffed Animal
According to Unneutered Cat Stuffed Animal seller, the Japanese brand OOPSHANA, the "application" of this testicled feline plushie is "everywhere you like, suitable for bedroom, living room, home, office, etc." Hmmm...