My fellow adults! Sledding might be our only solace in the predicted brutal and snowy winter ahead. The toil of lugging a sled up a snow-drenched hill, and the payoff of hopping on it to fly back down once we reach the top is exhilarating! It never gets old, even after we start to.
But a sled passes no judgment on the age of its rider. Some sleds even call out to adults, begging them to take a break from adulting, and come outside for a slide. Here are a few of them, my picks for the best snow sleds for adults.
Note: Sled prices are listed as they were at printing. Prices are subject to change.
Bradley Snow Tube Sleds $89 to $149. I like the Deluxe Edition of Bradley's Snow Tube. It's a sledding twofer! One inflatable 48" truck inner tube with RapidGlide bottom for She-Ra: Princess of Power to lounge down the hills in, and one little Snow Saucer for me to kneel on to fly face-first past her. Weeeee!
Both the Bradley donut cover and its donut hole are made of 600 denier polyester canvas on top, and 1000 denier slick coated RapidGlide bottoms. The cover has 2 sewn-in handles, plus a tow strap for schlepping it back up the hill after You(r)Tube-worthy descent.
GoFloats Winter Snow Tubes $30. Santa's got his herd of reindeer to fly him through the sky, you've got a herd of unicorn...and polar bears, penguins, and pink flamingoes to fly you through the snow. GoFloats Winter Snow Tubes look like your average pool floats, but the inflatable sleighs have been built and cold weather treated to stand up to the friction, speed, bumps, and fluffy white stuff covering the hills you'll use them on.
Sled Legs $46. Sled Legs are made in Canada. And that's your news for the day that contains no shock value, no potential for angering the masses, and nothing that makes you question how the hell we got here. In fact, it might be the most comforting news you hear all year, because of course. Of course Sled Legs are made in Canada. Where else would 100% wholesome, G-rated strap-ons come from?
Stiga Snowracer King Size GT Sled $255. Stiga calls this sled in their Snowracer series "King Size" because it's big enough for you to hop onto with your kid. Or, you know, by yourself while he waits at the top of the hill and cheers you on. Come on, how many times have you been on the receiving end of, "Watch me! Watch me!" I think it's time for Junior to take a turn telling you how you're so amazing and the absolute best sledder ever, as he hands you a custom-made Awesome Trophy.
Yukon Charlie's Hammerhead Pro XLD Sled $150. Yukon Charlie says, "Bottoms up, dudes!" This powder-coated 6063 aluminum frame over polycarbonate front and HDPE rear skis was made for sledders to slide belly down and head first into their descents.
Shappell Jet Sled $62. Shappell makes the best snow sleds for adults...to haul their kids' crap around in! Nah, the Jet Sled isn't a total buzzkill. Sure, it's better suited for your gear than your ass, but that gear could be for ice fishing or a secluded cabin getaway that requires snowshoeing in with food, fuel, and plenty of sexy time mood-making candles.
Yooner Seated Ski $179. Sort of a butt ski, sort of a sled, sort of a snow kart. The Yooner is sort of a lot of things by physical definition, but by use, maker TSL Outdoor would say it is only a thrilling, effortless, and, most importantly, learning curve-less downhill ride.
The compact Yooner rises a hair under 8" above the ground, resting atop a stainless steel, shock-resistant ski that attempts to replicate the gliding sensation of its foot-centric predecessors. No, wait, never mind the "attempt" hedge in that statement. According to TSL Outdoor, Yooner arrives with "Gliding sensations guaranteed!"
Alpine Classic Snow Sled $425. Molson Runner Sleds says it's "heirloom quality." Perfect for all the "heirloom" sledders out there. The Alpine Classic is a metal runner snow sled that brings a rugged design to a nostalgic aesthetic. The sled is built to handle gentle slopes and extreme runs with equal elegance and grace. Note: it makes no promises about how the rider on top will fare.
Roll 'N' Go Sledding Mat $10. A Slip 'N' Slide for the snow, this portable sledding mat rolls up yoga-style for easy transport, and then unravels to a 50" length of 1000 denier plastic-coated polyester canvas treated with RapidGlide anti-friction technology.
Timbersled Dirt Bike Snow Kits $2,000 to $6,200. Timbersled does for dirt bikes what Track N Go does for trucks. Except I think Timbersled's intent is less to enable safe passage, work, and rescue operations during inclement weather than to enable sick motocross races and Darwin Award-approved shenanigans in the snow. Their dirt bike conversion kits come in 4 different models and arrive fully assembled for simple (probably a relative term) installation on dirt bikes powered as low as 250cc.