Grooming

Haeyo Mayo Hair Nutrition Mask

$16 from Amazon »

Haeyo Mayo, 'eh? Now that looks like an April Fool's joke waiting to happen. It might not even be on purpose. A haircare product packaged in a squeeze bottle that looks exactly like the craft batch stuff my wife buys...

Osana All Natural Mosquito Repellent Soap

$24.99 from Amazon »

I see your lighting of a citronella candle to keep the mosquitos away, and raise you bathing in the essential oil, rubbing it in soap form all over my body as a skeeter beater for all 2000 of my bug-averse body parts...

Kula Cloth Antimicrobial Pee Cloth

$20 - $22 from Kula Cloth »

This one's for the ladies! The Kula Cloth looks like a potholder, and indeed has highly absorptive powers, but in this case the camping and hiking companion isn't sucking up heat, it's sucking up pee. The Kula Cloth is...

Convenience Kits Men's Toiletry Travel Kits

$11.61 - $26.35 from Amazon »

I'm not helpful enough to have priced out for you Convenience Kits' line of Men's Toiletry Travel Kits to determine if their consolidated dopp bags of mini bottles and packs of grooming products are a much better deal...

Black Cotton Swabs

$7.15 from Amazon »

What's the syllable count for a haiku again? Because I think that's what Daiso Japan was going for in their Black Cotton Swab description:...

Nose Wax Kit

$11.79 from Amazon »

"Do you know anyone struggling with nostril hair?" No joke that's the Nose Wax Kit's opener for suggesting an at-home schnoz overgrowth weeder is an ideal gift idea. I'd love to see the look on She-Ra: Princess of Power's...

Remedy Antifungal Soap

$14.95 from Amazon »

Struggling to find the perfect Valentine's Day gift that works for both him and her? I think I've got the Remedy (Soap) for your problem...

Quick-Dry Hair Bonnet

$19.61 - $28.43 from Amazon »

Who wants reduced hair frizz, increased natural shine, pumped-up volume, and a headpiece that makes you look like a cross between a Conehead and a syphilis microbe? Sounds like this Quick-Dry Hair Bonnet has gift for...

Sphynx On-the-Go Razor for Women

$17.99 from Amazon »

A Sphynx portable razor might not seem like a homerun gift for a woman this holiday season - and, unless she has a fur allergy, I'd go with a non-bald breed of cat if you plan to get her a kitten - but the crafty Sphynx...

No Batteries Nose & Ear Hair Trimmer

$9.99 - $10.99 from Amazon »

I guess some aliens prefer nasal probes. Self-administered via mind control from the looks of it. Hey dude, I know it says "Chooling Nose & Ear Hair Trimmer" on the box, but are you sure you want to put that thing where...

Handmade Custom Straight Razor Kit

$350 - $550 from Etsy »

I know no one wants to hear about Christmas yet, but if you want to give ShaveSmith's handmade custom straight razor kits as gifts for men this holiday season, better start putting your orders in now. The "handmade" and...

Zwilling J.A. Henckels 5-Piece Complete Grooming Set

$179 from Amazon »

If Zwilling J.A. Henckels' grooming set contains tips and blades as sharp as the company's kitchen knives, any dude who gets this luxury collection of tweezers and scissors and clippers is going to look clean and dashing...

Bite Toothpaste Bits

$12 from Bite »

Bite, brush, smile, repeat. Adios, toothpaste tubes! Bite Toothpaste Bits are solid tablets of condensed toothpaste that, once they co-mingle with your mouth and its spit supply, become the whitening, teeth-cleansing...

Comfy Boys Intimate Deodorant for Men

$14.98 from Amazon »

You've got your Asswipes to keep your backside in check, but if the front is still a little...swampy...Comfy Boys says it can turn your swamp crotch into a fresh open field of grass. On a sunny, 65-degree day with low...

Tame the Beast Nutt Butter Lotion

$19 from Amazon »

Tame the Beast's Nutt Butter isn't for no spreadin' on sammiches! ... Unless you're making a MAN SAMMICH! Nutt Butter is a multipurpose lotion whose primary purpose is to spruce up your nuts. It's a salve for your sack...

Hello Oral Care Activated Charcoal Mouthwash

$6.99 from Amazon »

Nothing about Hello's Activated Charcoal Extra Freshening Mouthwash looks like it would freshen your teeth and mouth. In fact, it looks like something an evil villain dad would threaten to wash his kids' mouths out with...

Suction Cup Travel Bottles

$3.99 - $19.99 from Amazon »

Suction cup travel bottles stick right to the shower surround! So even if there's no dish or ledge I'll never drop my soap - and never have to bend over and pick up my soap - again. Ahhh, maybe that bad childhood memory...

Warrior Axe Straight Razor

$125 from Amazon »

Ah, a straight razor for a straight-up warrior...who's also pretty dexterous with a razor. And an axe, for that matter. Magic Ethnics' Warrior Axe Straight Razor is a sight for sore Viking / Celtic / Nordic / gamer /...

CHIIZ Hands-Free Sonic-Powered Toothbrush

The CHIIZ hands-free sonic-powered toothbrush, just like your mama, wants to know if you really brush your teeth for the requisite 2 minutes, twice a day? According to the recommended "Bass Brushing" technique of tiny...

Duke Cannon Cold Ass Beer Shower Sack Gift Set

$75.95 from Amazon »

Duke Cannon has put together a fine gift for Dad - or any man who's into beer and hygiene - with their Cold Ass Beer Shower Sack. A limited edition compilation, the 6-strong set of grooming goods kicks off its rugged...

Handmade Skull Shaving Brush

$130 from Etsy »

One Skull Shaving Brush here to help you wipe that stubble...and that smile...and that skin and tissue right off your face. Handmade in Italy by Goth Chic Accessories, this wicked brush foams shaving cream and paints...

Asswipes Flushable Hygiene Wipes

$7.95 from Amazon »

Asswipes look like some real sophisticated wet naps. They must be flushable wipes from the French. Probably pronounced Ass-wee-pays...

CrossFloss Hands-Free Flossing Tool

I am definitely CrossFloss' target audience. The person who doesn't floss because it's tedious and time-consuming. And also because it makes me drool everywhere and I have a few teeth that are pressed so tight together...

Honest Amish Beard Balm

$12.87 from Amazon »

"Honest Amish?" Isn't that redundant? And clearly, the Amish grow some of the finest beards in the world and across time. So stamping a tin "Honest Amish Beard Balm" is marketing genius. The name sells itself...