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Ostrich Rider Costume

$89.99 from Amazon »

Last call for the costume haul! Less than 7 days to pull together your bid for Halloween's scariest / funniest / cleverest / elaboratest. And sexyscariest / sexyfunniest / sexy.... What better to help you round it up...

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Fear the Reaper Inflatable Costume

$31.77 from Amazon »

The Ghost of Christmas Future heard you're being a Scrooge about dressing up, so he's coming early this year to spook you into the Halloween spirit. Also, he's tired of getting stuck with crappy homemade iced reindeer...

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Bane Coat

Who needs a $1,000 Halloween costume? Magnoli Clothiers' Bane Coat should get you off to a good start. Slightly less so if you opt for the Goatskin over the Antique Cowhide construction--that one costs $200 less....

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Animatronic Shark Costume


Seabob, an animatronic shark costume visual effects designers VFXLAB recently took for a test swim in the San Bernardino Doubletree Hotel pool, is many things. Funny, a good prank, and a way for my friend Cornelius to...

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Electronic Chewbacca Mask

$37.99 from Amazon »

Chewbacca fans, Star Wars fans, fans of witnessing the good in the world, you gotta watch the video. You gotta. I know the lady in it wastes minutes of your life rambling and cackling on about Kohl's clothing and her...

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They Live Alien Donald Trump Mask

Remember John Carpenter's They Live? If you weren't into aliens and kitschy (yet poignant!) social commentary in 1988, the film suggests that America's "rulers"--the rich, the powerful, the elite, the CEOs and politicians--are...

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Well Endowed Zentai Suit

$44.99 from Amazon »

I see your Little Green Man, and raise it one Huge Green Man. If you prefer Orange, Red, Yellow, Blue,, Purple, or Never-Go-Back Black, I have Zentai suits in all of those extra-tight, extra-long-schlong colors too. So...

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Weed the Marijuana Leaf Mask

Sold Out from Amazon »

Stoner culture meets stoner agriculture. Weed the Marijuana Leaf is a mask for Halloween, a mask for legalization rallies, and most of all, a mask to cover up your face when you're super high and need to hide it for...

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The Dark Knight Joker & Henchmen Masks


I believe whatever doesn't kill you simply makes you...stranger. Looking for the perfect 6-pack of demented criminal masks this Halloween? Ministry of Masks has put together this set of replica masks depicting the Joker...

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Steampunk Frankenstein Costume

$800.95 from Amazon »

First of all, yes, I realize this is not technically a steampunk Dr. Frankenstein costume, but a steampunk Dr. Frankenstein's Creature costume. But I didn't name it, the people who created The Nightmare Collection of...

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Mullet Headbands

$9.99 - $14 from Amazon »

Did you hear that researchers predict 1 in 3 costumes this Halloween will include a mullet? If not it's because I just made that up, but I think with a little teamwork and a lot of these Mullet Headbands, we can make...

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Bad Kitty Catsuit

The first thing I noticed about this Bad Kitty Catsuit is that it looks equally hot, and makes me shift equally uncomfortably in my seat, on both thin, tan blondes and busty, red-lipped redheads. I'm still not able to...

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Tiny Hands

$10.99 from Amazon »

Prosthetic hands are pretty popular. These days, even amongst people who aren't missing their own. And here to complete the irregularly-sized-hand gag triumvirate, previously consisting of Man Hands and Finger Hands...

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Party Shark Costume

$69 from Amazon »

Blood-thirsty and beer-logged, that's the battle cry of any man donning this Party Shark costume. But take note: rule #1 of transforming into a squishy upright Jaws is you have to cap off the vicious predator look with...

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Mirrorman Suit

$2k from Etsy »

Mirror, mirror on my balls, who's the most desperate for attention of them all? Cosplay, Halloween, street performances, sure, they're all valid reasons to wear Etere Shop's Mirrorman Suit. But as the great Michael Jackson...

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Cry Baby Mask

Sold Out from Amazon »

Landon Meier's Baby Head Masks have become our creepiest, and possibly most popular costume post ever. But for those unwilling to pay the $350 piper for one, or those not quite mean enough to make the rest of the Halloween...

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Movie Quality Zombie Costume

$299.99 from The Horror Dome »

True, this walking dead costume doesn't look precisely like the Walking Dead costumes set to lumber across your TV screen tonight, but The Horror Dome's version is still pretty convincing with its movie quality gore and...

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Arkham City Harley Quinn Costume

$23.97 from Amazon »

I wouldn't be a red-blooded American male if I didn't direct your attention to at least one sexy costume this Halloween. (Note to Ladies: My other qualities include strapping, sensitive, and available.) And since one...

Survival Cards: EDC Multi-Tools in a Thin Credit Card Size
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Caged Animal Gorilla Costume

$154 from Amazon »

Its vendors describe this gorilla toting a human around in a cage as "the most incredible adult costume you've ever seen." And while the only way that statement could be even remotely true is if Kate Upton were wearing...

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Venom Mask

$694.95 from Composite Effects »

At first I just thought this Venom mask was realistic-looking in a cool way. Then I watched the video of the guy silently barking and growling with it on, and I still think it's realistic-looking. In a way that indicates...

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Alien Mind Control Mask

$97.99 from The Horror Dome »

Oh what I would give to wear this Alien Mind Control mask to work. I'd just ride the lobby elevator up and down all day long, standing there ominously to greet, and soil the pants of, everyone who gets on. I'm almost...

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Inflatable Chub Suits

$29.99 from Amazon »

WARNING: Keep Chub Suits away from fire. Ha! All I can think of after seeing these tub-o costumes and reading that line is the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man. Kids, take note: if you wear an inflatable Chub Suit this Halloween...

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Ghostbusters Slimer Mask

$19.99 from Amazon »

Where is he? Where's Slimer? Cornelius, do you see him? ... What, he's on my, what? He's...awww, sick, dude. Note to all: getting slimed with ectoplasm secretions from the world's most gluttonous ghost is way worse than...

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Muscle Suits

$735 - $3,499 from Flex Design Costumes »

The body builders at Flex Design Costumes might be the only body builders on earth who can guarantee they'll jack up, carve out, and rip your muscles to shreds with absolutely no effort on your part beyond telling them...

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Lady Deadpool Cosplay Costume

$200 from Etsy »

Well this is a nice outfit. Even if it didn't reference the delightful Lady Deadpool, I think I would like to see my favorite barista wear it to make my morning masterpiece quadruple grande mocha with extra whipped cream...

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LED Pasties

$29.99 from Amazon »

LED pasties glow so bright you can even see them through a T-shirt! So ladies can don a pair without exposing the Breasterson twins! And...wait, that's a selling point? Wamp, wamp. These pasties suck. Unless you wear...

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Man Hands

$24.37 from Amazon »

As Jerry taught us nearly 20 years ago, ain't nothing like a lady with feminine wiles from the neck up and Goliath-sized monstrosities from the wrist down to kill all desire we have to get her into bed. One look at ol'...

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Technomancer Digital Wizard Hoodie

$119.99 from ThinkGeek »

Sometimes for April Fool's Day merchants make up fake products and list them as real products that no one can actually buy and it's hilarious. And sometimes for April Fool's Day merchants make up fake products and list...

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Second Skin Santa Bodysuit

Sold Out from Amazon »

If your kids are afraid of Santa the jolly bearded fat man, just dress up as Santa the faceless creeper in the second skin bodysuit and show them what real terror is. Ho, ho, ho, an ocelot ate my face! Now I spread Christmas...

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Pug Mask

Sold Out from Amazon »

Maker Archie McPhee says, "No one can be angry at you while you're wearing this latex Pug Mask." I don't know whether to scoff at and rebuttal that or just swallow the couple tablespoons of vomit the statement made me...

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Inflatable Dinosaur Costume

$59.99 from Big Kid Costumes »

Giddyup, T-Rex! While I'm not so sure about the proportions of this inflatable dinosaur costume, what it lacks in mathematical accuracy it definitely makes up for in costume originality. Now riding into your Halloween...

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Panda Coat

$199 from Griz Coat »

Griz Coat, fast becoming the Mercedes of mammalian outerwear, is prepping to release their fourth installment, the Panda Coat. Bulbous bear head, luxurious full-length faux fur body, you know what sartorial delicacy you're...

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A Christmas Story Leg Lamp Dress

Although this leg lamp looks slightly less frageelay than the iconic Christmas Story bulbed version, I bet if I don a beige cardigan and rub it the wrong way it will drop me like a sack of potatoes and cost a chunk of...

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Your Face Mask

$299 from That's My Face »

Your face. Your buddy's face. Your mom's face. Angelina Jolie's face. can make any of them for your creeptastic wearing pleasure. They can also make them for your creeptastic wall-mounting or refrigerator-magneting...

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Digital Dudz Animated Smartphone Costumes

$29.95 - $64.95 from Morph Costume Co. »

Digital Dudz are back for Round 2 of their wildly popular animated, smartphone-enhanced Halloween costumes. 2013 designs are housed in infrastructures with lower profiles than the 1.0 versions', making them simpler to...

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No Face Mask

$9.96 from Amazon »

Sweeeeeet! I was wondering how I could pull off being a spoon for Halloween. Like mirrored sunglasses, the No Face Mask's outer film has a chrome effect that renders your mug invisible to onlookers, but keeps theirs in...

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Biomechanical Spinal Armor

$750 from Etsy »

JP Rishea of Bionic Concepts has created a bit of a name for himself in the cyber/steampunk gadgetry world. From his exo-gauntlet to his gas-powered LED wings, Rishea's designs always emerge as strangely tasty meals for...

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Halloween Contact Lenses

$29.50 - $239.99 from »

Minions will cower and tremble in fear when they meet the all-powerful GnarledJaggedPlaqueLaden Teeth Eyes! Hey, I get the appeal of colored and themed contact lenses, particularly for Halloween, cosplay, and other costumed...

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Walter White Hyperflesh Mask

$22,100 from Ebay »

Worn, signed, and sweated upon by Bryan Cranston himself. Also mingled in: the DNA of Jimmy Fallon and Common, whom the Breaking Bad star let take a turn in this Landon Meier Hyperflesh Walter White mask at Comic-Con...

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Life-Size Baby T-Rex Costume


Sometimes babies are born with disproportionately large body parts, which they subsequently grow into. Like dog paws and human eyes. No such luck for the baby T-Rex. Looks as if those little guys are stuck with midget...

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White Walker Mask

$994.95 from Composite Effects »

White Walkers are creepy, dude. Creepy enough that I think I'd rather look like one than at one. But I'd most rather look like Khal Drogo because then all men would still be scared of me, and all ladies would quiver in...

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Freddy Krueger Animated Chest of Souls Sweater

1, 2, Freddy's comin' for you. 3, 4 better lock the door. 5, 6 get a crucifix.... My sister let me watch A Nightmare on Elm Street when I was 5 and I think it made me wet the bed in fear every night for like 3 months...

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Wolf Coat

$249 from Griz Coat »

Just in time for summer! A full-length, faux fur coat with a mother fucking wolf head. On the one hand, the creators of Griz Coats have dissed the brand's icon in favor of this lupine addition to their line of crafty...

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Daft Punk Thomas Helmet

$500 from Etsy »

Ways to maintain popularity and credibility over the course of 20 years in the music industry: 1) Keep making good music; 2) Wear badass LED costumes from the future. Mauricio Santoro pays homage to the Thomas half of...

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Second Skin Star Wars Suits

$63.79 from Costume Craze »

Costume Craze has released a whole line of Second Skin Star Wars suits for 2013, but I feel like if a man is going to put a definitive outline of the family jewels on display, the face of a Wookiee would complement them...

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Baby Head Masks

$450 - $500 from Hyperflesh »

People who think babies are angelic and precious, I see your Gerber models, and raise you these three baby head masks. No, make that these three enormous, bulbous, horrifying, spawn-of-Chucky baby head masks. Landon Meier...

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Horse Head Mask

$21.84 from Amazon »

I know this horse head mask is meant to be grossly unsettling to the viewer, but when I look at it all I can think of is Kramer Tourette's-ing out "Gggiiiddy up" and I feel more amused than disturbed. I imagine the expression...

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Bubble Wrap Suit

$14.99 from ThinkGeek »

I wonder if they ship it packed in porcelain. Though an official nod to Dude, Where's My Car? UFO cultists and their leader, Zoltan, the Bubble Wrap Suit really transcends circa 2000 stoner flick pigeon holes in its practicality...