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The Emojibator

By: on October 26, 2016
  • The Emojibator
  • The Emojibator
  • The Emojibator
  • The Emojibator
  • The Emojibator
  • The Emojibator
$29
Check It Out

Sure it's a staple in Baba Ghanoush, and a common meat substitute for vegetarians, but nothing has done more for the eggplant than the digital world's decision to turn it into an emoji. Except, perhaps, an enterprising young lady from Philly's decision to turn it into an Emojibator. Yep. The formerly unremarkable aubergine has gone from funky lookin' purple fruit to funny purple symbol for the male genitalia to festive toy and bearer of great big purple aubergasms. Long (and strong) live the eggplant!

Whether you live on social media, live for pop culture, or live in a situation that requires your sex toys to pass for cat toys on occasion, the Emojibator will fill your life with some good vibrations. Lots of them. At 10 different power and sequence settings, and even in water if you like to vibe in the shower, bathtub, or vegetable garden on a rainy day. At 4.8" long and 1.2" in diameter, the buzzing silicone eggplant is also small enough for travel, and to use in decorating the bride's hotel room during bachelorette weekends.

Ready to Emojibate? Click here to order an Emojibator of your own.

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Wobbling Willy - Your Face on a Dildo (NSFW)

Dudes, check out the Wobbling Willy's practical application for all those selfies you've been taking. Your face on a dildo. A way, way sexier (and more functional!) gift for your girlfriend than that framed dick pic you...

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Breaking Bad RV Incense Burner

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Ah, the Breaking Bad RV Incense Burner. [Cue nostalgia.] Reminds me just how much I miss the Krystal Ship. I can't believe it's been 4 years since Heisenberg & Pinkman cooked their last batch. I hope things turn out better...

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Whiskey River Sarcastic Soaps

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Whiskey River Soaps are like modern-day Shakespearean comedies. Insightful in reading people. Precise in their social commentary. Charming and funny. And, to complement our 21st century needs, not tl;dr, and serving more...

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Japanese Electric Piston Masturbator (NSFW)

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Note: The Japanese electric piston masturbator's NSFW designation serves not so much as a reminder that this device is not suitable to view at work as it does a reminder that it is not suitable to use at work. I found...

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LaunchPAD - Fleshlight iPad Case (NSFW)

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Though it's not electric or piston-powered...or Japanese...like this friendly sex toy, the LaunchPAD does employ advanced technology in a valiant effort to enhance Man's alone time. The makers of male masturbatory aid...

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Selfie Vibrator with HD Camera (NSFW)

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It doesn't have to be a holiday or special occasion to surprise your lady with a thoughtful gift. The Svakom Gaga Sex Selfie Stick even has a foolproof, built-in mechanism for gauging how much she likes it. Come on, sugar...

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A Die Hard Christmas

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Yippee Ki Yay! A Die Hard Christmas: The Illustrated Holiday Classic is going to be on every kid's man's gift list this year. (Kids probably won't want it. They'll think the John McClane brand of killing and violence...

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The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist. And like that...he's gone....

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Images You Should Not Masturbate To

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If you're wondering if its title is true, feed your curiosities with the photo of the dog that looks like George Costanza's mom in this book of Images You Should Not Masturbate To. And I thought the salt shaker was bad....

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Time: Man of the Year Mirror

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Are you a Lebowski achiever? This Time: Man of the Year Mirror is a Dude-approved addition to your bar, bedroom, or office wall. It will give you a little boost when you're down, and a little motivation before your big...

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Paco's Taco Stroker

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At first I was like, Who the h-e-double-boner named this kitchen tool "Paco's Taco Stroker?" I'm going to make so many masturbation jokes when I write about it. And then I looked closer and was like, Holy hard-on! They...

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Little Rooster Alarm Clock Vibrator

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Oh (face) no, the rooster's crowing (buzzing) already?! Come (yes, please) on! Do I really have to get up (off)? I hear you, ladies. It's a brutal world of mornings, alarms, and orgasms we live in. I'll keep my fingers...