Volcanic Basalt Fiber Hanging Chairs

$1,918 - $3,517 from Etsy »

Latvian artist Girts Smelters began his volcanic basalt fiber furniture startup about 4 years ago in his country's capitol city of Riga. Today, his wickeresque hanging chairs have found homes everywhere from Google and...

Outdoor Hanging Sky Swing Chair

$349.97 from Amazon »

Can you tell I'm an avid swinger? First I dreamt of this rustic porch swing bed, and then the outdoor patio arch swing, and now, for those who prefer to sway in the summer's breeze seated upright, I present Outsunny's...

Mushroom Log Kit

$29.95 from Williams Sonoma »

They won't be magically delicious, but the mushrooms that grow out of these spore-injected logs will be tasty as shiitake. Williams Sonoma's homegrown mushroom kit features a hand-cut hardwood log filled will little fertilized...

LiveMap - Bike Helmet with Built-In Navigation

$1,500 - $2k from LiveMap »

Though specifically in development for use on a motorcycle, I'd probably wear the LiveMap helmet while driving and walking as well. Its built-in navigation system and voice-controlled interface allow those rolling 'round...

Liquid Mercury

Sold Out from Amazon »

I think metal is OK, and I think liquid is OK, but for some reason if you put them together, "OK" turns into SO FUCKING RAD. (Huh. I just realized I feel similarly about vodka and this girl Karin I know). And when it...

VaporBLUNT Portable Vaporizer

$219.99 from Got Vape »

Mary, Mary quite contrary, how does your ganja high grow? With eighths and screens and heat-activated steam, I've got a VaporBLUNT in tow! A VaporBLUNT is a portable vaporizer with a ceramic, battery-powered heating element...

Minecraft Creeper Squirrel Feeder

Discontinued

Now might be the first time in my entire life I am tempted to use a certain acronym. I definitely, 100% won't write it, but when I saw this Minecraft Creeper squirrel feeder in Rick Roemer's Etsy shop I legitimately did...

Victorian Star Wars Portraits

$499 from Kult »

The Star Wars boys give a pretty decent representation of Victorian times, huh? Jabba the Hutt almost looks dapper. Or at least less like the massive wart my friend Cornelius grew on the inside of his arm when he went...

Zombie Safe Zone Maps

$19.99 - $24.99 from Design Different »

When they strike, the zombies will go for the masses. So those of us living in major US cities have 2 choices: be afraid; or be prepared. Since Ryan McArthur of Design Different, unlike the evening news, isn't into fear...

Mass Effect N7 Leather Jacket

$475 from BioWare »

You can now have Commander Shepard's N7 leather jacket in 100% Italian lambskin, modeled after the European racing style, and manufactured for BioWare by the same company that makes leather coats for Ferrari. That is...

Backpacking Food Kit

$52.99 from Amazon »

While a backpacker's true culinary dream is probably something along the lines of Padma Lakshmi awaiting at each day's destination with a 4-course gourmet meal of filet mignon, lobster tail, and piles and piles of naan...

Breakfast Sandwich Maestro

$29.95 from Amazon »

5 minutes to a breakfast sandwich. No drive-thru on earth can beat that...mainly because of the whole leaving the house and driving to the drive-thru portion of the equation. Otherwise I guess most of them could. If there...

Four-Barrel Underwater Dart Gun

As we prepare to honor the USA with a day of drinking beer, eating potato salad, dinking around with bottle rockets, and setting fire to the sky, the Four-Barrel Underwater Dart Gun would like to remind us we should also...

Judge Dredd Lawgiver

Discontinued

From the meticulous maestro who brought us the Aliens M41A Pulse Rifle comes a similarly immaculate replica from Judge Dredd. Fabricator The Kingpin touts his custom-made Lawgiver as a precise copy of the one Judge Stallone...

Titanium Alloy Tritium Keychains

Sold Out from Amazon »

OK, this is like the Goldilocks & the Three Bears of tritium keychains. The first set we featured was by far the coolest and most coveted, but also the hardest to acquire. Many readers deemed the task impossible. Then...

Hammock Bathtub

Usually when people describe themselves they inflate the truth or do that reverse psychology trick where they say a bunch of self-deprecating things in an effort to convey the opposite meaning. In both cases they would...

Ninja Blocks Ultimate Tech Warrior System

$199 from NinjaBlocks »

The only thing I know about Hackers is that Angelina Jolie makes a hot one, but according to Ninja Blocks, that's enough to qualify me for the job. Of a hacker, not Angelina Jolie. Though I could probably pull off the...

Cards Against Humanity - A Vicious Party Game

$25 from Amazon »

Cards Against Humanity is basically a more blatantly raunchy and politically incorrect version of the game Apples to Apples. And Apples to Apples is basically an evolution of Mad Libs that better lends itself to large...

Wireless Handheld Feather Mouse

$24.99 from DudeIWantThat.com »

When my fingers and hand get all tense and worn out gripping a mouse they're often too weak to use for...other activities. So this wireless pointer-pen-looking mouse appeals to me and my desire to keep my right hand fresh...

Denali 115-Piece Home Repair Tool Kit

$44.25 from Amazon »

I feel like giving men tool kits as gifts is sort of like giving women exercise equipment: it's the ultimate passive aggressive way to take a dig. In this case, "Hey, do some chores," instead of, "Hey, lose some weight."...

Shock & Awe Zombie Killer Knife

$17.46 from Amazon »

If you missed out on the Chain Link Zombie Slayer Axe, console...and arm...and shock & awe yourself with this sick little zombie killing knife. Combining the functionality of a kitchen cleaver and the intimidating aesthetics...

Trident Iceni Magna Diesel Sports Car

$162k from Trident »

Regular diesel, kerosene, paraffin, or biodiesel can now take you from 0 to 60 in 3.7 seconds. Meet the Trident Iceni Magna diesel sports car. It can also top out at speeds of over 190 mph. And its 6.6-liter turbo diesel...

Indoor & Portable Brazilian Grill

$69.99 from Amazon »

Mmmm, Brazilian steak houses. Forget Chinese and Old Country Buffets, these rodizios are the true definitions of gustatory decadence and gluttony. All-you-can-eat grilled meat from the rotisserie, served table side--you...

Smuggle Your Booze Sunscreen Flask

$6.50 from Amazon »

Summer music festivals, baseball games, and days in the park with the kids are about to get a whole lot jollier. Instead of SPF 30, this innocuous bottle of responsible adult sunscreen contains room for 8 fl. oz. of ABV...

Military Prismatic Sighting Compass

$7.70 from Amazon »

I don't think it will do much for blindness, but this Military Prismatic Sighting Compass could be your Amazing Grace for being lost. Features of the camo-printed conquerer of directions include:...

King of the Ring Fitness Arcade Game

Nexersys calls their King of the Ring arcade game a "virtual fighting ring" but one look at all those full-contact pads and the surrounding cage and I am 95% sure that I would sustain non-virtual injuries while using...

Ultrasonic Levitation Machine - Hoverboard Tech

No stranger to manipulating sound, and no stranger to successful Kickstarter projects (we previously covered the Soundlazer), Richard Haberkern believes he has created some legitimate Hoverboard technology. Without magnets....

Dragon Stapler

$15.90 from Amazon »

No fire or dagger tail, but this dragon's got teeth that will bind your paper together forever! Muahahaha! He'll also staple your finger if you're not careful. Speaking of which, in junior high my friend Cornelius used...

SILIC Self-Cleaning Shirt

$48 from SILIC »

Hydrophobic. Seems like it would mean afraid of water, doesn't it? Well it does. But in this case, the hydrophobia is a good thing, not a buzzkill like it is when someone invites me and my friend Cornelius to go windsurfing...

Door Jammer Portable Security Device

$23.99 from Amazon »

I've always liked the simplicity and practicality of that Add-a-Lock portable door lock, but this Door Jammer device looks even easier to use. Just wedge it under any inward opening door and give it a kick. It also appears...

Superfight! Card Game

$35 from Amazon »

Superfight! instructs us to imagine Cards Against Humanity meets Apples to Apples. For the sake of what comes next, I would add to imagine this meeting takes place in either a dark alley, an octagon, or on opposite ends...

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Black Zirconium & Copper Ring

Giveaway: Black Zirconium & Copper Ring

Why should the ladies get all the jewelry from Father Christmas and Daddy Sugar this year? Dudes, here's your chance to walk away from the tree with your own glistening finger gem, this one forged from slick black zirconium...

Ego Boost Beauty Chocolate with Collagen

$13.39 from Firebox.com »

I have bad news and I have good news. The bad news: stuffing your face with chocolate will plump up your ass with unsightly cottage cheese-looking lumps of fat. The good news: stuffing your face with Ego Boost chocolate...

Epic Frog Escape

This 2 minute video clip is the equal of any movie I've seen this year. Suspense, intrigue, a classic soundtrack. I won't ruin the ending for you... but the good guy wins. This is the gutsiest damn frog I've ever known...

Wipebook - Whiteboard Notebook

$14 - $28 from Wipebook »

Wipebook poses the question, "You know how creative people use whiteboards to generate cool amazing ideas?" And I ask the question, "You know how creative people with cool amazing ideas who can't draw, or even really...

Cobra iRadar Smart Detector

$54.99 from Amazon »

Well. It will never achieve the legendary status of the Fuzzbuster, but Cobra's iRadar 200 does bring a few tricks of its own to the table. Paired with an iPhone or Android smartphone, this smart radar detector provides...

Refold Portable Cardboard Desk

$127 from Refold »

Made in New Zealand from 100% recyclable cardboard, Refold's Red Dot Award-winning portable desk unfolds from a lightweight portfolio case into either a sitting or standing work station. Is it strong enough to hold your...

Teeth Whitening Accelerator

$125 from Amazon »

I don't know if it was the Gemini or some other LED teeth whitening accelerator, but I definitely saw one of these raver's mouth contraptions at CES this week. The company had about 10 recliners set up for eager guinea...

Your Face Mask

$299 from That's My Face »

Your face. Your buddy's face. Your mom's face. Angelina Jolie's face. ThatsMyFace.com can make any of them for your creeptastic wearing pleasure. They can also make them for your creeptastic wall-mounting or refrigerator-magneting...

Cardok Underground Parking

$61k from Cardok »

Boy do I hate having to park both the Porsche and the Lambo on the front circle drive. It really detracts from the visual splendor of my gilded front door and Batman topiary. What, a retractable underground parking space...

Kneeling Dragon Table

$378.08 from Amazon »

Not only is this dragon holding my beer and taquitos for me, he's kneeling in supplication while doing it! How pathetic. Come on, Puff, Jackie Paper's not coming back. It's time to start rebuilding your manhood. See if...

Vecto Bluetooth Speaker & Charging Station

$119.99 from DudeIWantThat.com »

Veho's Vecto is a speaker multi-tool. It pairs via Bluetooth and has an integrated microphone like most portable speakers these days, and is sheathed in a water-resistant housing like some, but continues bringing the...

Blade Driver Crossbow

Ornery watermelons, prepare to meet your fate. Tactical tinkerer, and Laser Glove creator, Patrick Priebe's Blade Driver crossbow launches whirling buzz saws at all deserving targets, but especially those that are mealy...

Unzipped Flesh Kit

$9.30 from Amazon »

One way to make others jump out of their skin is to jump out of yours. This Unzipped Flesh look requires some legwork and talent to pull off, but look at the striking levels of gruesomeness and morbidity one can achieve...

Cross-Body Packs

$33.97 - $35.99 from Amazon »

Is it acceptable for a straight male to wear a cross-body pack? Not on his chest like he's Alan-satcheling it for the day or Mr. Mom schlepping around his kid, but across his back? Because I have a lot of weed and Pringles...

The Tentanic 1,000-Person Tent

$11,882 from Firebox.com »

Ahhh, the Tentanic is cruising towards shore just in time for both camping season, and the 3D re-release of Leonardo DiCaprio's most humiliating 3 hours on the big screen. A 1:2 scale replica of the luxurious Titanic...

Zero Day Bed

"Simplicity is resolved complexity." So says architect, designer, sculptor, and creator of the Zero Day Bed, Jorge Goval. The indoor-outdoor lounger and sleeper subscribes to nature's tropism phenomenon--the adaptive...

Fridge Skins

$70 from Kudu Magnets »

Dressing up kids and pets is so passe. The new canvases of self-expression are appliances. And the most decadent of appliance haute couture is Kudu's magnetic fridge skins--panels that adhere to refrigerators' full facades...

GPS & HUD Snow Goggles

Sold Out from Amazon »

As much as I miss these simpler days on the ski slopes, I think I'd rather move forward with Oakley's Airwave HUD & GPS goggles than don my pink & purple snowsuit and man perm to travel back in time. Though you'll pay...

Fifty Farts Playing Cards

$7.99 from Perpetual Kid »

Smells like a fun night of Texas Hold 'Em! The Fifty Farts deck of cards "serves as a taxonomy of the rectal expulsion of gas byproducts of the mammalian digestive process." Just like my own body after a 3-course dinner...

Twister Bed Sheets

$64.90 - $79.90 from Twistex Bed Sheets »

A natural pairing given that naked is both the best way to sleep and the best way to play Twister. Aussie company Twistex Bed Sheets ships this set of Twister bedding worldwide in Double, Queen, and King sizes. Included...

The Daddle Dad Saddle

Sold Out from Amazon »

Pardon my language, but you have got to be Fraggle Rockin' me. A Daddle? Have we really entered an age in which grown ass men are relegated to their hands and knees, serving as equestrian play toys for their entitled...

The Beast Duffel Bag

$907 from Amazon »

What makes a duffel bag a beast? Bigness. Ruggedness. Resilience. What makes a duffel bag The Beast? According to Saddleback Leather, all of the above, plus a 100-year warranty (yes, that's one hundred), a mere 3 seams...

Johammer J1 Electric Motorcycle

$32k - $35k from Johammer »

Why does being eco-friendly and emission-free always seem to translate to pastels and girly colors? I don't think the Austrian Johammer J1 electric motorcycle looks that bad in design structure or general aesthetics--no...

AtmosRX Dry Herb & Oil Vaporizer

$59.99 from AtmosRx »

It seems like vaporizers are heading towards fitness tracker levels of popularity. And just as the former have encouraged tons of people to work out and get in shape, here's hoping the latter convince them to smoke weed...

Big Boss Oil-Less Fryer

$89.99 from Amazon »

We all know there are 2 failsafe ways to make any food taste good: 1) Add bacon; 2) Batter and deep fry. Too bad both make you tub out and smell bad. However, for those intent on eating their nightly helping of fried...

P'INCH Instant Ruler Pin

$7 from WKRMN »

P'INCH doesn't serve a thousand different functions. Or even a multi-tool standard 8 to 12. And really, it doesn't even do what it does do at great length. Literally, since P'INCH is a pin that's exactly 1 inch long....

Wheelman 50cc Gas-Powered Skateboard

Sold Out from Amazon »

Wheelman on the street. Wheelman on the grass. Wheelman on the beach. Wheelman past the Pee-wee Herman-clad cyclists at a whopping 26 mph. Oh what's that, padded spandex ass? Yeah, my speed is generated by a 50cc 2-stroke...

Klymit Inertia Camping Mattress

$71.99 from Amazon »

I can't decide which I'd use my genie wish for: Klymit's Inertia XL superlight ergonomic camping mattress, which almost looks like it could double as part of an intricately carved mummy tomb, or the beard of the dude...

Bushnell BackTrack Personal GPS Tracker

$48.03 from Amazon »

Not that I ever get lost, but...oh, put a sock in it, Mama, I wouldn't get lost even if I ever went somewhere either!...were I a directionally and locationally challenged person, I might like to have Bushnell's little...

Mega Man Mega Buster Gun Replica

$79.99 from ThinkGeek »

Sorry dudes, the Mega Man Mega Buster gun replica is still in ThinkGeek's scheming stages. Full production of this beta version is not expected to hit shelves...and the arm-cannon-hungry hands of holiday shoppers...until...

WTF? Icon Prints

$15 - $40 from Etsy »

Santa, you better man up because your sleigh is about to be filled to the gates of heaven with prints of "Batman Puking His Friggin Guts Out" and "Bazooka Whale." I don't know what's more enamoring here: Jann Van Zant's...

Buzzy Pain Blocker

$41.99 from Amazon »

Buzzy helps relieve the pain of shots, lab draws, bee stings, burns, burning medicines, Band-Aid rip-offs, and tattoos. Tattoos? Really? I mean, I can get behind a vibrating ice pack fashioned in the likeness of a bumblebee...

Soak 'N' Wet Dunk Tank

$199.99 from Amazon »

It's like an inverted Polar Bear Plunge. And the Soak 'N' Wet Dunk Tank would be the perfect way to sober up after New Year's Eve. Also ideal for making your friend Cornelius regret having passed out in your front entry...

Autonomous Drone Filming System

$949 - $1,149 from HEXO+ »

The battle cry of Next Level Aerial Filming's forthcoming autonomous drone system: Get stupidly good-looking aerial shots. Stupidly good-looking. Can't go wrong with that. The system pairs with most drones, action cameras...

Life-Size Furniture Erector Set

Now that you've mastered the crane erector set, how about using these life-size assembly parts, plus whatever imagination and elbow grease you can muster up, to craft yourself a table to display it on? French company...