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Thursday, October 10, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

I'm not on the best of terms with my smoke alarm. First it fell from the ceiling and went off. Then I left a few pounds of bacon in the skillet for too long and it went off. Then I had this girl over to watch Major League...

Tuesday, July 9, 2013
$75k - $135k from WaterCar »

Uh, can panthers even swim? I thought cats hated water and stuff 'cause it might, like, cleanse their evil spirits. I'm just not clear on the logic of WaterCar's name selection process for what is supposedly the world's fastest...

Friday, March 22, 2013
By: Flickr

Whatever, I could make a Bilbo Baggins Bag End Bonsai. Or I could if I had the meticulous, exacting hands of a surgeon. But then I'd probably just be a surgeon because I bet it pays more than selling miniature Japanese trees. I can't say for sure though because, unfortunately, Hobbiton hobbit-hole creator Chris Guise isn't selling his Lord of the Rings floral masterpiece, just taunting us with...

Sunday, November 11, 2012
$21.66 - $77.10 from Amazon »

A swing and a miss no more. Not with 400 Lumens of LED light pouring from the tip of your baseball bat. Available in compact, but business-takin'-care-of 15-1/2", and say-goodbye-to-the-bones-in-your-face 23-1/2" models*...

Thursday, February 7, 2013
$24.95 - $64.95 from Dan & Dave »

Each of the 54 cards in Dan & Dave's Ultimate Deck brandishes a unique piece of artwork courtesy of design agency Stranger & Stranger. And yes, most of them are macabre and vaguely disturbing like the Unicorn Head Mask and...

Saturday, August 3, 2013
$74.99 from Ilumi Bottle »

The ILUMI Smartbottle, a container that tracks and analyzes water intake, is like your mom: it follows you around telling you what to do, keeping track of whether or not you do it, and offering unsolicited commentary about your progress as you go. All because it loves you and wants to see you succeed in staying hydrated....

Monday, September 10, 2012
$4,500 from Ebay »

Maker International VentureCraft Corp. describes the One-Person SportSub Solo as a "yacht toy." That can't be a good sign of its retail price. Another bad omen: their Website lists no costs for the submarines themselves, but...

Tuesday, August 27, 2013
$55 - $80 from Eighty-Eight Industry »

Aero Ti creators Eighty Eight Industry went aerodynamic with their chopsticks after studying the physiology of holding typical round, square, and octagonal shapes. When the hand's three fingers merge to grip a pair, they create...

Wednesday, August 21, 2013
$19.99 from ThinkGeek »

Do I believe in ghosts? Well, I believe something drank half of those empty Bud Light Lime bottles strewn across my living room floor because I couldn't have possibly blown through three 6-packs on my own. And before you say...

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Swallowable Parfum is a capsule that, when ingested, releases perfumed scents through its host's pores. So instead of spritzing dewy showers of juniper and orange blossom onto your body, you'll be able to sweat aromatic beads...

If bat shit looked like 1000mW of ice-blue lightning, the S3 Spyder III Arctic Laser would be the physical manifestation of bat shit crazy. As it stands, the world's most powerful laser is just fuckin' nuts. Wicked Lasers' (absolutely, 100% legal) handheld bolt of pure spectral power counts amongst its marketable skills the ability to: Sear through ornery plastic, pop bitch-ass balloons, burn continuously, 24/7, without sustaining damage to its laser diode, function in 9 different operating modes, including Strobe, Constant Wave, SOS, Beacon, and Tactical Hibernation, emit 0.25 Lux of light at a distance of 6,856 meters, turn anyone it hits in the eye at a distance of 149 meters or less into Ray Charles, minus the musical talent and soul.

And if that weren't enough to get it laid every day for the duration of its 5,000+-hour serviceable life, Guinness is currently testing the S3 Arctic for the official title of World's Most Powerful Laser.

The S3 Arctic Series Laser resides in an aircraft grade aluminum chassis that's smaller than a standard flashlight.

Tuesday, October 16, 2012
$700k from RaptorGTR »

The Mosler RaptorGTR compares itself to the Bugatti Veyron SuperSport and Lamborghini Aventador. But only to point out that, in terms of power-to-weight ratio, it is better than both of them. (Though in terms of marketing...

Thursday, May 23, 2013
$500 from Etsy »

Ways to maintain popularity and credibility over the course of 20 years in the music industry: 1) Keep making good music; 2) Wear badass LED costumes from the future. Mauricio Santoro pays homage to the Thomas half of the...

Saturday, October 13, 2012
Sold Out from Etsy »

I guess I can kind of see now why some people are turned on by goats. Oonacat's Demon Hooves, a pair of spiked, knee-high boots with cloven foot pads in place of typical toes and heels are pretty sick. I mean in the good way...

Thursday, July 25, 2013
$89 from Amazon »

Reviewers of ABEO's HDVR-150, a hi-def video/still camera built into an attachable rearview mirror, have predominantly words of praise to lay upon the device, but I'm not fully sold on its application. Certainly in this age...

Monday, March 4, 2013
$4.99 from ThinkGeek »

The little bit of good news I have for you today is that we are only 16 days away from spring and 27 days away from Easter*, which means Peep eating season is upon us! Even better tidings for Minecraft die-hards: Marshmallow...

Thursday, September 26, 2013
$25.99 from Amazon »

It's obvious what the Mangroomer is, so let's just cut to to the chase: what can this DIY back shaver do for you?...

Thursday, September 8, 2011
$6,500 from Opulent Items »

Fish are smart. Everyone knows this. A fake ceramic treasure chest and plastic plants get old after a few minutes. Enter the labyrinth. A veritable swimmer's amusement park for aquatic life, this will keep your smelly morsel...

Tuesday, December 27, 2011
$16.22 from Amazon »

Although Agent BloodRayne used a similar arm blade to exterminate vampires, this non-digitized replica is made of stainless steel, not silver, so it will be of little assistance in your mission to annihilate Edward Cullen...

Thursday, June 20, 2013
$58 from Bethesda »

Mmm, I smell a Cake Bake-Off coming on. Residents of Vault 101 take note: I will accept submissions of the sponge variety only this year. A fleece zip-up nod to the Fallout series, Bethesda's Vault 101 hoodie is passable video...

Saturday, December 1, 2012
$199.99 from Watchismo »

While seemingly morbid and in poor taste at first glance, The Accurate--a Mr. Jones Watch--intends to serve as a reminder of our fleeting seconds, minutes, and hours on earth. Its dial and rim are even mirrored so that when...

Wednesday, January 30, 2013
$650 from Etsy »

I like the idea of the Force being with me, but I also like the idea of stuff. With one of these Star Wars rings I will still be able to envision and harness the power of an intangible Force, but, more importantly, I'll be...

Thursday, August 1, 2013
$224.95 from Amazon »

I have to say, it's a little disappointing to see LEGO, a pastime that has supported content diversity for decades, join the ranks of Keds, toilet paper, and P. Diddy's annual summer party, and go all white. However, I understand...

Thursday, September 13, 2012
$3,500 from Peter Lynn Kites »

I see your flying squirrel, Flying Dutchman, and flying f@*k, and raise you a flying blue whale! No, make that a life-size flying blue whale. Wind master Peter Lynn's superbly massive kite measures in at over 60 feet long...

Wednesday, August 28, 2013
$59.49 from Amazon »

I just had a childhood flashback. My grandma totally owned and operated one of these hydro-flosser things. But it didn't connect to the shower head like Waterpik's handy Showerpik, it had a reservoir you had to fill, and I...

Thursday, January 17, 2013
$34.99 from ThinkGeek »

My 12-year-old nephew plays Minecraft all day long. I'm not exaggerating. I got him a lime green Minecraft Creeper Beanie for Christmas. So that if he ever decides to stop playing Minecraft and go outside his ears won't be...

Monday, June 3, 2013

1, 2, Freddy's comin' for you. 3, 4 better lock the door. 5, 6 get a crucifix.... My sister let me watch A Nightmare on Elm Street when I was 5 and I think it made me wet the bed in fear every night for like 3 months, and...

Wednesday, October 30, 2013
$8.86 - $15.42 from Amazon »

Some acid trip mood lighting to complement your acid trip pillow? Together, they're guaranteed to satiate seekers of a psychedelic, yet drug-free lifestyle. And since HitLights' color-changing LED bulbs come with a remote...

Tuesday, September 3, 2013
$520 - $565 from Trail Insight »

I didn't realize there were people out there into running or hiking a trail, and then doing more grunt work grooming or reconfiguring it as their reward for finishing without passing out. Is this a new extreme sport? I also...

Wednesday, January 23, 2013
$9.95 from Amazon »

The Cool Blue Light Experiment Kit teaches inquisitive minds about chemiluminescence and the rest of us how to make our arms glow without killing and dismembering a firefly. Weee! Using copper sulfate, perborate, and luminol...

Thursday, August 29, 2013
$100 from Wish.co.uk »

Simulate ZDay. Fight zombies. Know how Marty McFly felt when he walked down the streets of 1955. But you'll be even further back in time. You'll be in 1940, in the midst of WWII. Instead of fighting off your teenage mom's...

Friday, November 1, 2013
$42.95 - $169.95 from Onnit »

First it was the apes that got the swing and pood treatment. It was only natural, really. Now, fitness...dare I say maverick?...Onnit has designed another limited edition set of freakish kettlebells, this time giving a nod...

Tuesday, February 5, 2013
$29.95 from Etsy »

This Handbook for the Recently Deceased contains 220 blank pages. I don't know if that's better or worse than Adam and Barbara Maitland's gibberish-filled version. Perhaps better, as at least buyers can fill this one with...

Thursday, November 7, 2013
$160 from 80stees.com »

By the power of Greyskull! No, wait, that's not it. It's Morphin time! Uh...getting closer, but...no. Hold on...ah, here we go. These robotic lion fangs were impeding the movement of my cerebral neurons. Activate interlock!...

Monday, September 3, 2012
$27.99 from Amazon »

The Ole Smoky Moonshine family has honed the art of whiskey makin' since the early days of Smoky Mountain settlement. Distilling was a way to survive during hard times, both in terms of economics and, we presume, morale. After...

Sunday, December 23, 2012
$25k - $35k from ideum »

Ideum's 55" Platform and Pro Touch Tables, carnivals of interactive media suitable for simultaneous use by up to 4 computing people, have just been walloped by the Hammer of Thor in the form of the company's newest advancement...

Sunday, July 7, 2013
$21.71 from Amazon »

What time is it? Let me check my Secret Agent projection gun alarm clock. Shoot! It's time to get up....

Friday, January 6, 2012
$5 from Ravelry »

Too stoic to wear your heart on your sleeve? Then wear your frontal lobe on your Bieber side-swept bangs! The "brainchild" of a self-proclaimed starving medical student, this clever, kitschy knitting pattern will earn you...

Friday, October 26, 2012
$17,500 - $19,500 from Tourneau »

Devon Timepieces has harnessed the raw, industrial, I-Love-Lucy technology of conveyor belts in their Time Belt series of watches. Each wicked, steampunky wrist ornament has a five-piece belt assembly mounted on a central...

Monday, January 9, 2012
$16.95 from InstaMorph »

The next time you throw your hands to the sky and lament, "Argh! If only I had a doohickey with a flat lip on that end and a kind of hook-claw on the other that's small enough to fit in this slot here, and strong enough to...

Monday, December 24, 2012
$349.99 from Cat Wheel Company »

In a way I hate the idea of the Toy-Go-Round cat hamster wheel because really the only kinds of cats I like are the lazy fat ones that look as if they might go into cardiac arrest if they even stood up. But in another way...

Wednesday, September 11, 2013
$1.03 million from Porsche »

Porsche has entered the hybrid market with its 918 Spyder: progressive or a bunch of pomp and circumstance? I mean, sure, it's time for all car makers to contribute to the trek towards alternative vehicle fueling, but the...

Thursday, December 12, 2013
$124.99 from Jacob Bromwell »

Jacob Bromwell's set of Old West shot glasses are pure copper, handmade by up to 5 American workers, and in very limited supply. So get 'em while they're smokin' hot, and you just might have the perfect beginnings for staying...

Sunday, March 4, 2012
$885 from Uggi Lights »

Talk about lighting that makes a statement, sets a mood, and shows up all your friends with bass, elk, and golden retriever taxidermy. Skinned cod fish, or Uggi, lights are the fantastical creations of Icelandic artists Dgg...

Wednesday, March 13, 2013
$189 - $339 from Christie Street »

Last week I recounted my triumphant tale of Scrabble domination over a girl I once dated. At that time, I literally had not seen...or even really thought about...this girl for at least 3 years. But then I wrote about her competitiveness...

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Weebles wobble but they don't fall down, and Bodice Rockers fall down but they get right back up and stand just as tall as they did before. So I guess they're more similar to Rocky Balboa than Weebles. But they're not fighters...

Wednesday, November 14, 2012
$45 - $250 from Morlock Enterprises »

Even if your kitchen crusades consist of little more than scrambling eggs or, like my dad, changing other men's lives by showing them how to use a skillet to reheat day-old pizza to its just-delivered splendor, the Fighting...

Saturday, February 16, 2013
$5,500 from Opulent Items »

Check out the Optimus Prime of seating designs. Though slightly less cool than the balls lounger, Francesca Donati's chameleon lounger still looks way more comfortable and relaxing than my hangover. Whoa, non sequitur. Why...

Tuesday, December 13, 2011
$1,196 from UD Replicas »

From the brilliant mind of Lucius Fox and "the copycats" at UD Replicas comes this faithful rendition of the bat suit as worn by Bruce Wayne in Batman Begins. Painstaking work with the original screen suits has gone into capturing...

Tuesday, June 25, 2013
Discontinued

The 3D Converter system extracts pertinent data from any video game and translates it into 3D format viewable on any 2D or 3D TV. Yep, Frogger in 3D on my 18" Sony from 2005. Now I know what all those elderly people at the...

Thursday, August 30, 2012
$30 from Amazon »

It's Dungeons & Dragons for the boozin' 21+ crowd. DrunkQuest combines fast-paced card game mechanics with shades of the D&D fantasy world with a few 6-packs and a liter or two of Captain Morgan for a party game of competitive...

Thursday, August 25, 2011
$10.01 from Amazon »

"I was under the impression it would hold molten carbonite as it states clearly in the title this is a carbonite MOLD and it's very poorly constructed for this purpose. Secondly, it's SMALL. No, you can't put people in it...

Monday, October 28, 2013

Gizmo on a swimsuit? What fool thought that was a good idea? It's the one article of clothing whose expressed purpose in life is to bask in the sunlight and get wet. Mogwais can't be exposed to bright light. And MOGWAIS CAN'T...

Monday, January 7, 2013
$235 - $260 from GoSt Barefoots »

I suppose calling theses shoes PaleoBarefoots appeals to a wider market, given the current eat-and-function-like-a-caveman craze popularized by the likes of CrossFit and Mark Sisson, but Chainmail Shoes sounds so much cooler....

Monday, April 8, 2013
$119 - $199.95 from Amazon »

Look at that dude standin' on his umbrella! Aw snap, he just wailed on an 80-pound heavy bag with it. Holy crap, now he used it to hack up a watermelon! That's sufficient enough evidence for me to believe the Unbreakable Umbrella...

Monday, September 5, 2011
$1,108.53 from Amazon »

Hey man... like wanna come hang out in my bus? I wonder what goes on in a tent like this? I doubt there would be any drugs that's for sure. And probably nobody with a guitar or patchouli smell. Definitely no rastafarian hats...

Friday, February 1, 2013
$67,500 from Carbon Fiber Gear »

If they were going put the effort into creating a bathtub out of airplane and race car materials, couldn't they have made it look like an airplane or race car? Not that I wouldn't still clamor to spend some QT in Corcel's...

Wednesday, January 1, 2014
$112.63 from Amazon »

Happy New Year! Here's something to make you feel fat, ugly, and depressed motivate and inspire you to reach your 2014 fitness goals! The Fitbit Aria Wi-Fi Smart Scale measures weight, body fat percentage, and body mass index...

Monday, April 29, 2013
$58.95 from Lovelysally »

Laser Cats has finally made the leap from SNL short to Italian women's fashion. Sans copyright infringement given that these leggings' cats shoot lasers from their eyes instead of their mouths, and appear to be permanently...

Tuesday, March 5, 2013
$99 - $119 from Amiigo »

What if you had a tiny device to track your reps, sets, duration, speed, and intensity? Would you work out more? Would you work out harder? Yeah, me neither, but I'd use it to barter with a strong, fit person who actually...

Thursday, January 17, 2013
$50 from Etsy »

Art for people who like to read the words and for those who like to just look at the pictures. Pete Ware pours his graphic design talents into this series of swell prints depicting iconic movie characters shaped from the typography...

Thursday, February 2, 2012
$270 from Valyrian Steel »

Though it ultimately couldn't keep Ned Stark's head affixed to his body, the Valyrian steel sword Ice did serve his majesty of Winterfell well. And, should you be one of the lucky keepers of the North to grasp the formidable...

Tuesday, January 29, 2013
$11 from Etsy »

While my ideal Bat Key would start the ignition to a Batmobile, I guess one that makes an X on my computer screen will suffice until I raise $620,000 and learn how to drive a stick. Etsy artist Anya's Batman Keyboard Stickers...

Monday, October 28, 2013
$139 from Ledge Pants »

While my immediate concern upon spilling an entire cup of coffee on my crotch is searing the hair off my balls and neutralizing my baby-making potential, once I stop screaming and have received a pudding pop to console me...

Monday, October 14, 2013
$73 - $128 from Etsy »

Sterling silver, copper, and the aura of someone up to no good. Maybe a psycho chef. A sociopathic sadist. Your mom. (Zing! It's like Patrick Stewart. It never gets old.) Those are the primary components of jewelry shop Arrok's...

Sunday, September 2, 2012
Discontinued

Antagonist. Necromancer. Lord of the Rings. SRG Armoury brings the darkness and malevolence of Tokien's Sauron to life in this custom-made Full Plate Armor Set. Constructed from 16 - 18 gauge mild steel, all suits are forged...

Friday, March 8, 2013
$10 - $25 from Machine of Death »

Just when I think games have been completely overshadowed by Breaking Bad viewing parties and orgies as the most popular indoor group activities, Kickstarter projects like Machine of Death: The Game of Creative Assassination...

Tuesday, October 2, 2012
$12.41 from Amazon »

Shots. In addition to proving (or destroying) your manhood, they are also the best way to clear out random bottles of crme de cacao, orange bitters, and Lillet Blanc from the back of your liquor cabinet. Seattle mixologist...

Friday, December 6, 2013
$50 from Amazon »

If your kids are afraid of Santa the jolly bearded fat man, just dress up as Santa the faceless creeper in the second skin bodysuit and show them what real terror is. Ho, ho, ho, an ocelot ate my face! Now I spread Christmas...