A Geek's Gift Guide of Gadgets, Gear and Novelties    * Updated daily

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Wednesday, January 23, 2013
$24.95 - $55.95 from Society 6 »

Obviously the only one of these celebrities who really sat for his French Republican Guard...or whatever...portrait in the 19th century is Chuck Norris because he's immortal and easily over 200 years old. The rest are fakes...

Wednesday, March 19, 2014
$49.99 from Amazon »

I decided to spotlight the Darth Vader bathrobe because this morning I got an email from someone named Anastasia Kryzinski entitled, "What Does Your Love Python Need?" I thought it was the best email I ever received, and I...

Monday, September 10, 2012
$24.34 from Amazon »

Holy crap, as if I weren't already terrified enough of this beast! Now they have to go and put a raptor costume on it. Well tiny dinosaur dog, now you can keep your beady eyes, your snaggleteeth and your flesh-flaying, sickle-shaped claws to yourself. You think a clever Halloween getup makes you look precious and approachable? Well I see your precious and approachable, and raise you the scars encircling...

Saturday, September 21, 2013
$119.93 - $149.95 from Amazon »

When I was 8 or so my family got one of those tactile floor lamps for the living room. Touch it once to light it, twice to make it brighter, thrice to illuminate all, and four times to return the world to darkness. It was...

Sunday, April 21, 2013
$63.79 from Costume Craze »

Costume Craze has released a whole line of Second Skin Star Wars suits for 2013, but I feel like if a man is going to put a definitive outline of the family jewels on display, the face of a Wookiee would complement them much...

Thursday, September 26, 2013
$9.50 from Amazon »

They call it hot ice because sodium acetate is extremely unstable (probably moody and demanding too) and begins hardening immediately as it drops below its melting point of 58.4 to 58 degrees C (about 136.5 to 137 degrees F). The process is exothermic, and the resultant "ice" hot. When boiled and cooled again, the substance returns to its starting liquid form. Without forming crystals, which is...

Thursday, November 14, 2013
$21.43 from Amazon »

When I was 6 years old my babysitter forced me to sit on a skateboard with her and roll down the ominously steep street on which we lived. About halfway to the bottom my suspicions that her idea was a terrible one and she...

Friday, September 27, 2013
$69.50 from Garrett Wade »

The Yankee Push Drill does not plug into the wall, which means its successful use is dependent entirely upon the well-oiled machine that is its handler's body. I bet my right arm and shoulder would be sore for 3 days if I...

Saturday, August 17, 2013
$14.25 - $20.35 from Amazon »

It's an AT-AT. Costume. For your dog. I know Halloween is still 2 months and 14 days away, but I sense these babies are going to sell out quick come October 1st. And anyway, a lot of dog owners get a charge out of dressing...

Monday, August 15, 2011
$24.95 from DarkfinGloves.com »

Ever wondered what it might be like to have webbed fingers? Wonder no longer. These durable latex rubber gloves will have you flying by other frogs in the water. Perfect for SCUBA diving, swimming, surfing and even jumping...

If bat shit looked like 1000mW of ice-blue lightning, the S3 Spyder III Arctic Laser would be the physical manifestation of bat shit crazy. As it stands, the world's most powerful laser is just fuckin' nuts. Wicked Lasers' (absolutely, 100% legal) handheld bolt of pure spectral power counts amongst its marketable skills the ability to: Sear through ornery plastic, pop bitch-ass balloons, burn continuously, 24/7, without sustaining damage to its laser diode, function in 9 different operating modes, including Strobe, Constant Wave, SOS, Beacon, and Tactical Hibernation, emit 0.25 Lux of light at a distance of 6,856 meters, turn anyone it hits in the eye at a distance of 149 meters or less into Ray Charles, minus the musical talent and soul.

And if that weren't enough to get it laid every day for the duration of its 5,000+-hour serviceable life, Guinness is currently testing the S3 Arctic for the official title of World's Most Powerful Laser.

The S3 Arctic Series Laser resides in an aircraft grade aluminum chassis that's smaller than a standard flashlight.

Saturday, September 8, 2012
$449 from Platinum Stages »

Life is a highway. I wanna grind it. All. Night. Long. Get outta my dreams, and onto my pole. Little red corvette, baby you're much too fast. I need a pickup truck...with a stripper pole hitched out back. I wonder how many...

Saturday, November 9, 2013
Discontinued

Apparently, we're allowed to take aim only at the Dark Side. Sneaky Studios didn't design any of their Star Wars shooting targets with Luke or Han or Yoda behind the bullseye, which in a way cuts out an entire buyer demographic...

Thursday, January 16, 2014
By: PrioVR

As predicted, probably by Nostradamus and Back to the Future II (but not the Mayans because they thought we'd be dead by now), 2014 is shaping up to be the year of virtual reality. As the buzz around the Oculus Rift VR gaming...

Saturday, May 19, 2012
$3,999.99 from Etsy »

The practicality of slaying a dragon in 100% leather armor is questionable at best, but one thing's for sure: all the fair maidens who haven't seen this much cowhide since Kiss performed at the dairy farm are gonna dig it....

Tuesday, April 30, 2013
$149.95 - $199.95 from Lunasee »

Lunasee ASL wheel lights for motorcycles increase rider visibility and safety by providing active side lighting over a broad range, even when bikes are outside the direct path of another vehicle's headlight. That the wraparound...

Tuesday, December 10, 2013
$12.35 from Calligraphuck »

Ah. It seems Mr. Garrison has forayed into the business of paper products. Merry Fucking Christmas. Come on, you know you want to sing along as you read it. Maybe tie a little Mr. Hat plush to the ribbon if you're one of the...

Wednesday, December 18, 2013
$1k from Blade HQ »

This dual-bladed evolution of bladesmith Brian Tighe's Nirk Tighe won Most Innovative Custom Design at the 2012 BLADE Show. Now what I wonder is if the Buy Tighe knife is really so outstanding that it's worth a cool grand...

Friday, December 27, 2013
$25 - $45 from RIPT »

Pipes, mushrooms, a Cape Feather or two, and it's even a real, useful map of the New York City subway system. The Super Mario NYC Subway Map salutes Super Mario World in its pixel-by-pixel mass transit trek through 16-bit...

Tuesday, August 20, 2013
$2,499 from Double Robotics »

What if you could be in two places at once? I mean really. I mean more really than just having a view via a live video feed. What if you could walk around, look at, and engage with anyone or thing you wanted, with your face...

Tuesday, February 18, 2014
$41.36 from Amazon »

Fogged mirrors! I can't groom my facial hair or Dep Gel my head for, like, 8-1/2 minutes after emerging from the shower unless I stand there like an a-hole blowing my mama's hairdryer on it. Towels: do not work. Squeegees:...

Tuesday, December 3, 2013
$1.95 - $6.99 from Amazon »

Now drive slow, honey, it's not a race. Ha! Clearly that bit of motherly wisdom is a crock, as indicated by this vehicle manufacturer-issued decal right here on my side view mirror. It is a race, Mama. And all of those VW...

Thursday, August 8, 2013

The 21st century: where dog food is for humans, and human beds are for dogs. Oh, and you can also wear the Internet on your face. Murphy’s Paw Design and Clark | Richardson Architects have developed two Barkitecture-award-winning...

Thursday, March 21, 2013
$13.06 from Amazon »

Here we have a book about one of my favorite topics. Yeah, that's right. Origami. Apologies that the only samples I could find during my Google image search of the sexy paper creation instructions contained in Pornogami: A...

Wednesday, February 29, 2012
$49.99 from Amazon »

iPhone, iTouch, Android, all laser-tag-loving smartphone owners, get ready for the AppTag Laser Blaster! The app-and-apparatus duo that will turn your basement, your backyard, and your 3-mile stumble home from the bar at 3...

Monday, November 11, 2013
$15 - $48 from indiegogo »

Though there are many things I can do to prevent a hangover...yeah, Mama, not over-consuming alcohol is indeed one of them...I find drinking glass after glass of water, or eating Tums at 1-hour intervals, or restricting myself...

Saturday, December 15, 2012

I must spend about $5,000 per year on pizza. Usually between the hours of 1:00 and 3:00 a.m. How cost effective (and fun for my neighbors) it would be if instead of Internet ordering from Dominoes and watching Ollie add toppings...

Tuesday, May 27, 2014
$155.55 from Amazon »

A selfie in the hand is worth two on Instagram. Fujifilm's Instax Share SP-1 printer enables immediate and direct mobile printing. You want your mug on the break room fridge/dangling from your rearview mirror/sent over to...

Saturday, January 21, 2012
$90 from Beta Brand »

Boredom meets the boardroom with these stylish yet comfortable dress pant sweatpants. These chameleons of the fashion world, at first glance, look like fine charcoal wool trousers. But, don't tell your legs that. They're...

Saturday, November 10, 2012
$26.95 from Amazon »

What better way to enjoy giving a gift as much as receiving one than to present it to its recipient in a Puzzle Pod? For this DaVinci Code-style cryptex, which must be solved before the goods inside are accessible, will likely...

Tuesday, March 26, 2013
$129 from BikeSpike »

Maybe if theft hadn't plagued the rough & tumble town I grew up in, I would have learned to ride a bike when I was little. Genetic blessings of coordination and proprioception could have contributed to my cause too. Kids today...

Wednesday, February 22, 2012
FREE from CV Dazzle »

A complex, but increasingly important concept, computer vision (CV) is the collection of algorithms that devices ranging from security cameras to Facebook's PhotoTagger use to automatically detect and recognize human faces....

Thursday, February 27, 2014

Leave it to Japan Trend Shop to extol the virtues of these Humanoid Fleeces--a "secret" second run of the onesies that sold out during their initial release, your ticket to looking like a superhero in a cult sci-fi movie--while...

Wednesday, April 30, 2014
$369.99 from Amazon »

While I generally approve of anything that makes manual labor less laborious for me, I am not too stoked to hear about GreenWorks' battery operated lawn mower's 70-minute runtime. 70 minutes?! Great. That means my mama's going...

Sunday, May 20, 2012

Alien prequel Prometheus doesn't hit theaters until June 1, 2012. So in the interim, let's take a trip down memory lane to the series' Alien vs. Predator installment. Are you there? OK, now throw in a motorcycle, a grip of...

Friday, January 13, 2012
$75 from Etsy »

Every groom-to-be gets cold feet at some point, and this zombie wedding cake topper brilliantly summarizes both the worst and best case scenarios that could play out when that happens. Worst Case Scenario: Your feet are so...

Tuesday, October 29, 2013
$85 from Hammerhead »

Shark Week loyalists already know that the hammerhead group boasts enhanced sensory receptors and maneuvering skills. Plus, its butt ugly face, which looks to have been on the receiving end of a Bugs Bunny self-defense effort...

Wednesday, December 19, 2012
$119 - $599 from TechJect »

If it looks like an insect and flies like an insect and is virtually indecipherable from an insect to the human eye while in motion, it must be a palm-sized robot dragonfly with spying, advanced gaming, R&D, and security capabilities....

Saturday, April 20, 2013
$39.95 from Amazon »

Can you imagine the anxiety, frustration, and ultimate sheer madness a one-way-mirror birdfeeder is going to cause in cats? As a passionate cat hater, I'm buying six. You think it's funny when you jump on my lap, nudging and...

Friday, April 11, 2014
$23.99 from Amazon »

The only redeeming qualities of being on an airplane are that I can guiltlessly spend 3 to 9 hours doing nothing but eating, getting drunk, and watching full seasons of Battlestar Galactica. However, this is also problematic...

Sunday, March 16, 2014
$30 from Sosu Sauces »

I told them this is what would happen if they let the roosters near the tomatoes. The cocks just can't keep it to themselves. And now we have this bastard child. This atrocious, humiliating...awesome-sounding, mouthwatering...

Tuesday, February 7, 2012
$10.99 from Amazon »

Sometimes, the last thing you want to wake up to is morning head. It's unruly and it's hard to handle, yet it must be calmed before leaving the house. It especially must be calmed before facing your ball buster of a boss and...

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

The Doxie One could have solved a problem I encountered a few weeks ago when I hauled out the 15-pound hp scanner I bought in 2003 to transfer some hard documents to my laptop. Everyone in the room started laughing at me and...

Tuesday, September 24, 2013
$50 from indiegogo »

The more I think about the Triposo Travel Belt, a belt that connects to smartphones' Triposo navigation apps and vibrates on the left, right, front, or back of the body to indicate the direction the wearer is meant to go...

Sunday, March 30, 2014
$7.73 from Amazon »

Well, Star Wars: Jedi Academy doesn't come in a sweet mechanical vault or reveal ancient secrets of the Jedi discipline like The Jedi Path, but I bet it will be an easier purchase to share with your kids. I mean that in the...

Wednesday, December 7, 2011
$17.95 from Amazon »

Ah perfect. Pets are great... until they impose on us in any manner. Cuddling on the couch and receiving unconditional love? I'm in. Taking them out, walking them, playing with them... that's kind of a nuisance. It really...

Monday, March 24, 2014
$176.23 from Amazon »

Compatible with Android and iOS, the Netatmo Urban Weather Station will track and provide comprehensive feedback on your immediate environment. It's an entirely personal weather device with one tracking module for interior...

Tuesday, August 27, 2013
$30.94 from Amazon »

I was doing some soul searching for ways in which I might class up my life, and not 5 minutes in, as if poised to instantly answer my prayers, I locked eyes with this gallon-sized flask. Isn't it beautiful? Brushed finish....

Monday, April 1, 2013
$579 from Matterform »

Matterform's Photon caters to people who want to get in on the 3D printing action, but have no existing computer modeling skills, and no desire to acquire any. A desktop-sized 3D scanner, the Photon will convert any physical...

Thursday, January 9, 2014

It's like a cordless drill, except desirable for use on a tire. That is, when applied the automatic inflator will shoot air into the tire instead of puncturing it and letting air out. Though using a cordless drill for the...

Bar
Thursday, May 22, 2014
$9.76 from Amazon »

A manual contraption for slicing lemons and limes into perfect wedges that isn't my two hands may not be a groundbreaking addition to the world, but as a bar tool I'd pretty sure I'd use it at least as much as my shaker, and...

Wednesday, January 18, 2012
$6.48 from Amazon »

The lowest frequency noise a human ear can detect: a mouse. The highest: Mariah Carey. At least according to one points-for-creativity-deserving test taker included in F in Exams: The Very Best Totally Wrong Test Answers....

Monday, November 4, 2013
$59.99 from ThinkGeek »

They may be only moderately reminiscent of the uniforms Picard & Co. wore in Star Trek: The Next Generation, but definitely these hoodies will be more comfortable, breathable, and sported acceptably by all shapes and sizes...

Tuesday, January 7, 2014
$14 - $19 from Food Huggers »

Haha, so long Ziploc bag press 'n' seal tracks that don't frikkin' press 'n' seal! I've got rubbers to keep my leftover produce safe now! OK, technically 100% BPA-free, FDA grade silicone, but the point is Food Huggers have...

Monday, April 21, 2014
Sold Out from Amazon »

Yeah, MP3 speaker pillows are all fun and games until someone drowns their connected smartphone in a pool of drool and shorts it beyond repair. It's about time we got a Bluetooth upgrade to this otherwise swell advancement...

Saturday, November 17, 2012
Discontinued

Dudes, I think the Flip n'Grip Wallet is cool to the power of Paul Revere riding a Tron Light Cycle, and I'm willing to bet that you too are cool to the power of Paul Revere riding a Tron Light Cycle, so don't just rely on...

Friday, October 11, 2013
$46.43 from Amazon »

Hot Wheels aren't exactly cost-prohibitive so I'll still probably just buy a few when I get a hankering to dick around with toy cars at work, but for the kiddos and handy Daddy-Os out there who dig doing things themselves...

Tuesday, August 6, 2013
By: OMsignal

Here's a neat product for people who like to nettle and bore friends and strangers to the edge of death with news of their ailments, injuries, stress levels, and overall health. You want to converse about your state of being?...

Monday, May 7, 2012

I hope anyone who has one of these nifty Interactive LED Tables also has a few gallons of disinfectant on hand, because the two primary modes of interaction I foresee with their pressure-sensitive, illuminative surfaces are...

Friday, September 20, 2013
$11.11 from Amazon »

How do you declare a thumb war in Wookieespeak? Yeah, that's right, 1, 2, 3, Raaawwwrrr! Time to suit up, buckle down, and probably tie one on, Cornelius, because I challenge you to a lightsaber duel. From the knuckles down....

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Yes, $62 for six AAs is steep, but they hold their charge for up to 10 years, and, let's face it, you're never going to have trouble finding a couple mils of pee when they need a reboot. NoPoPos (No Pollution Power) are eco-friendly...

Tuesday, March 5, 2013
$203 from Etsy »

Although this grizzly bear won't tote you around on his back and serve as your mystical forest companion, chances are he also won't eat you when you plop down on or dive bomb him while he slumbers. Because this is a Big Sleeping...

Monday, January 14, 2013
Discontinued

Some would say the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are making a comeback. LL Cool J would probably say don't call it a comeback, they've been here for years. Teri Hatcher and John Travolta would warn Leonardo, Michelanglo, Donatello...

Thursday, April 3, 2014
$7.95 from Amazon »

I question this Zipstrip's ability to zippily strip cilantro stalks, which is pretty much the only (culinary) herb I'm aware of that doesn't make me want to sneeze and vomit simultaneously, but if you like rosemary, thyme...

Monday, May 12, 2014
$19.99 from Amazon »

You're still on your own for keeping yourself from falling off the ladder, but at least with LadderLimb your buckets, bags, and drills will be safe from gravity's pull. A tool for every handyman and Daddy-O, the LadderLimb...

Thursday, December 19, 2013

Mmm, mmm that baby looks good enough to dunk in guacamole and drizzle with Cholula. I'm a little confused about the tortilla swaddling blanket's accompanying hat though. Why does it have a knot in it? Aren't tamales the Mexican...

Saturday, March 9, 2013
$30 from Sober Up »

I sure hope my balance, mental clarity, and liver are enjoying themselves right now because my rippin' headache has yet to feel the benefits of Sober Up, the detoxification enhancer I just chugged like Kool-Aid. I know of...

Sunday, February 16, 2014
$80 from Snurk »

Not much of a lake snoozer? How about sleeping in a swimming pool? Snurk's pool bedsheets add a second option to spending the night enveloped in a large body of water without drowning. Fun! Trippy! Still horrendously scary...

Thursday, April 4, 2013
$899 from Montague »

Montague collaborated with DARPA to develop its Paratrooper, a high-speed, all-terrain tactical mountain bike that folds at the turn of a lever into a 3' x 3' pack in less than 30 seconds. Obviously, it was specked for military...