Wolverine Style Hand Claw Dagger

What the WTF Amazon? You're in the weapons trade now? These costume-y looking hand claws have real blades of razor-sharp, 8.75-inch, 440C stainless steel, which make them exponentially and disturbingly more portentous than actual claws. The best--meaning the worst--part is that the claw secures quickly and easily to the hand with a simple Velcro wristband. Even a child could use it! So, perfect for your next cage fight with a tiger, but entirely inappropriate for pretty much any other use.

Except maybe piercing and flipping meat. Hmmm, like at my summer BBQs. Where these daggers of steel could split a dozen brats down their midlines in 10 seconds flat. Or sling a triumvirate of burgers dripping with charcoal-infused perfection onto perfectly toasted buns. Or possibly impale any uninvited werewolves attracted to the scent of steaks I'll sear to a succulently juicy, blood-red rare. Aw man, Hand Claw = my ticket to undisputed title of Grill Master.

OK, I guess I kind of see the appeal.

Wolverine Style Hand Claw Dagger Gifts

• Officially Licensed Wolverine Prop Replica Jacket - $258.31
• Wolverine Costume Wig - $12.76
• Wolverine Classic Dogtag Set - $5.95
• Wolverine X Claw Dagger With Plaque - $29.99
• Wolverine Electronic Battle Claw - $32.99