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Kitchen

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Friday, September 2, 2011
Sold Out from Amazon »

Some damn genius figured out how to bring s'mores away from the campfire and into the kitchen. And there's no pre-heating? I hate pre-heating. Pre-heating is for suckers and proactivists (just made up a word!). In a related...

Sunday, October 9, 2011
Discontinued

I like my poison with coffee and cream. But, a pint of Guinness will do as well. And I think it's incredibly polite to notify me that I've been poisoned after, so I really appreciate the frankness the bottom of this pint glass...

Tuesday, May 28, 2013
$51.09 from Amazon »

Percolator is just an elitist way of saying thing that forces liquid into one end of a solid, such as coffee or tea, and out the other as a way of steeping it. But Bialetti probably felt it sounded more sophisticated and legit to call this duo of espresso shot makers a stovetop percolator than, like, a stovetop caffeine enema....

Thursday, December 6, 2012
$6.98 from Amazon »

Rum & Coke on the rocks? Yawn. You gotta HP-Lovecraft-mythical-sea-creature-things up every once in a while. Make it The Kraken Black Spiced Caribbean Rum & Coke on...more Kraken! Fred & Friends' Coolamari octopus ice cube...

Saturday, February 22, 2014
$8.99 from Amazon »

It would be better if it were in the shape of the toast I'm going to pile it on, and I also doubt my ability to flip an egg within such tight confines without losing part of it to my burner, but I still appreciate the sentiment...

Saturday, January 7, 2012
$30 from Amazon »

Do you eat, sleep, and breathe your favorite pro football team? Now you can graduate from the proverbial to the literal NFL fanatic with the Protoast Toaster. Its heating coils are fitted with your favorite team's emblem, searing your beloved Packers / Patriots / Cowboys / 49ers onto every jam-smeared, wheaten piece of goodness that crosses your lips. Note: The Denver model occasionally brands...

Friday, August 9, 2013
$89.99 from Amazon »

Anyone who names all of their kids "George" obviously has one-track sensibilities and a one-note personality. He might be able to push Foreman Grills as a convenient tabletop producer of tasty sandwiches, but he could never...

Saturday, May 12, 2012
$9.73 from Amazon »

Darth Vader ice cubes make the season's light saber red hues of Kool-Aid and Jones Soda all kinds of cool. Even better, the helmet molds are also approved for melted chocolate, hard candy, and gelatin, so a veritable fleet...

Wednesday, August 14, 2013
$99 from Baking Steel »

The Modernist Cuisine Baking Steel, a heat-sucking slab of metal for home ovens, stovetops, and grills, deems itself virtually indestructible and swears it will never shatter or crack. Funny, because I guarantee the exact...

Tuesday, April 16, 2013
$18.99 from Amazon »

It's not that quesadillas are hard to make on the stovetop or in the oven, it's that one typically craves a quesadilla when one is not fit to operate the stovetop or the oven. With minimal risk of administering second degree...

Thursday, January 12, 2012
Sold Out from Amazon »

Part mercenary weapon, part magnetic field holder for your grocery list, these high quality magnets will hold up to a sheets of paper firmly against your refrigerator or any other metallic surface. Most crappy fridge magnets...

Tuesday, August 13, 2013
$35.99 from Amazon »

Get ready for ZERO!...GRAVITY!...SPICES! The cinnamon that used to consume 1 square inch in your cupboard? Now it hangs mightily in mid-air. The oregano? The thyme? The herbes de Provence? All haul out their death grip and...

Saturday, April 27, 2013
$8.36 from Amazon »

Chef'n decided one banana slicer more popular for its witty Amazon reviews than the function it serves wasn't enough for the world. Or maybe they were worried Hutzler's model was on the verge of becoming a monopoly. Or maybe...

Friday, June 1, 2012

The Cliff Hanger Mug replaces traditional coffee mug handles with the synthetic boulders rock climbers use for indoor honing of finger strength. Not to state the obvious, but, that's funny. And apropos. Because coffee drinking...

Wednesday, September 25, 2013
$10.99 from Amazon »

I don't know if the Perfect Pancake Pan really cooks perfect pancakes as advertised, but if it does I would like to eat 8 of its delectably fluffy jack-flappers right now. Sumbitches look gooood....

Friday, October 4, 2013
$28.80 from Amazon »

Waffle egg sandwich with bacon and cheddar. Waffle ice cream sandwich with Brownie Heath Bar Crunch and Mint Chocolate Chip. Waffle projectile with wells full of mustard and Sriracha. So many possibilities now possible with...

Thursday, March 27, 2014
$11.99 from Perpetual Kid »

Why do I need a cookie cutter with a bite taken out of it? I can do this myself. In fact, when I have cookies taking bites out of them is pretty much all I do. I like the shark though. Kids might dig this whole Snack Attack...

Wednesday, September 4, 2013
$16.39 from Amazon »

A set of Gandalf vs. Saruman salt & pepper shakers solidifies it: salt is evil, pepper is good. Makes sense. Salt can curse us with high blood pressure resulting in an increased risk of heart disease and stroke. The worst...

Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Discontinued

I don't know shit about baking, but I know plenty about eating. And these are gonna taste better than your average cupcake or brownie. And if they don't you can smash them into each other and see which one is the toughest....

Thursday, May 30, 2013
$25 from GNR 8 »

Although my refrigerator is only one in a long and distinguished list of areas around my house that reek, tackling the remnant scents of curdled milk and decomposed lettuce with a Kuro Cube is probably a decent place to begin...

Saturday, September 14, 2013
$7.99 - $14.95 from Bit@h Cooks »

I could never match skills, and for once am not even going to try to match wits, with Jason Bailin. Bailin is a man who endeavors to transplant other men from Chinese takeout vestibules to the kitchen by way of tough love...

Tuesday, May 29, 2012
$575 from Supermarket »

In the grand tradition of the Boob Scarf and Boobs Ice Luge, we present: boobs. And following in the footsteps of the Female Form Guitar and Peanut Butter & Jelly Wallet: butts. The 6-piece Tea & A Set redefines the concept...

Thursday, September 22, 2011
$15 from Amazon »

Shoot up your hamburger in style with this condiment filled side-arm. I have a feeling if a family owns two of these, the mom (or dad if the family is really weird) is going to have a lot of cleanup to do after lunch....

Tuesday, February 21, 2012
$49.95 from Amazon »

Food snobs, stoners, children never lucky enough to have parents who took them to the Olive Garden, meet the Perfect Pieces Lasagna Pan. From the Baker's Edge folks' noodles, to the Barilla boxes of yours, comes a quadra-channeled...

Thursday, July 5, 2012
$7.04 from Amazon »

The universal sign for poison, now in a handy mold for making things that presumably are not! Well, maybe teaching children to associate pancakes and eggs in the shape of skulls with poison will help combat the growing problem...

Wednesday, August 17, 2011
$19.95 from Williams Sonoma »

Luke (inhale, exhale) I am a cookie. Simple way to turn your stupid, boring, crappy cookies into something out of this galaxy. God I love cookies. If you don't like cookies, try the pancakes....

Wednesday, June 5, 2013
$181.59 from Amazon »

One time I went to Chile and while others gaped at the glaciers of Patagonia and marveled at the volcanos of the Lake District, I ate empanadas. While they trekked the rolling green hills of fourth-generation farms and strolled...

Wednesday, May 1, 2013
$14.95 from Williams Sonoma »

Nevermind the meat shredders in the photos, I think I'd pay $14.95 just for a bite of that meat. What is it, pulled pork? Yeah, it's gotta be pork. Nothing but a pig could look so succulent in shredded form. Excuse me for...

Thursday, May 9, 2013
$149.95 from Williams Sonoma »

Williams Sonoma predicts Breville's compact countertop crispy crust pizza maker will change my life. Now, far be it from me to argue with the world's #1 kitchen store magnate about life-altering experiences, but given that...

Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Sold Out from Amazon »

Admittedly, the Five Finger Fillet Knife Set will consume a chunk of kitchen countertop space. 10.4" x 11" x 10.4" to be exact. But I think its radness in appearance more than compensates for its shortcomings in spatial functionality....

Friday, November 16, 2012

Monkey see, monkey do--if you drink like a fish, your kids will too! So put away that bottle of Tanqueray, stow the Whisky Advent Calendar 'til after hours, and grab a couple of these Handblown Fish Straws to sip, suck, and...

Friday, July 6, 2012

One biting comment I could make about Tigere Chiriga's Floating Mug is...hmmm...donut hole. I got nothin'. It's just a simple, yet truly novel design, whose purpose is as terrifically useful as its look is incredibly cool....

Monday, April 9, 2012

A gun loaded with carbs, cheese, and marinara. Are you brave enough to slice it and pull it? The loser of Pizza Plate Russian Roulette is designated dish bitch. Or gets sent on a beer run. Or has to buy the Santa Claus sack...

Saturday, December 1, 2012
$6.88 from Amazon »

The holidays. They encourage us to appreciate and reminisce about those we love. Yet somehow, they also provoke us to fixate on those we hate. Fred & Friends examined this 'tis the season, yin-yang dynamic...and saw dollar...

Tuesday, July 30, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

Citizens first met the Wheel of Death when the spinning, human-laced target debuted in 1938, and 75 years later, it still represents an exhilarating feat of precision and certainty whose use is likely to get at least one person...

Friday, October 28, 2011
$13.97 from Amazon »

Long before Generation Z began itching to replicate 120-ounce 7-Eleven Slurpees in flavors like Razzzmatazzz and Electrocuted Tree Frog at home, Generation X itched to replicate carnie and peewee sport concession stand ICEEs...

Tuesday, December 11, 2012
$16 from Amazon »

Foodies, space conservationists, and those who don't have rad to the max mamas to cook all of your meals for you and deliver them weekly in Tupperware containers with clear content labels and smiley faces and notes about how...

Sunday, October 13, 2013
$129 from Amazon »

This gift from the heavens cooks a Belgian waffle and an omelet simultaneously. Concurrently. At the same fucking time. Do I even need to say triple-decker waffle omelet sandwich? Do I need to say anything else at all?...

Tuesday, December 27, 2011
$20.95 from Amazon »

Those nights of binge eating and the haunting lure of a fridge filled with simple carbs and trans fats? Send them to their metaphorical death. Die leftover deep dish pizza! See how you like it in your gut, cookie dough ice...

Friday, August 19, 2011
$12.95 from Amazon »

I like to keep my beer almost slushy it's so cold. And I never disrespect wood. These double wall glasses are the perfect solution. They help insulate your drink from your fat, hot, grubby little hands while keeping your table...

Thursday, July 4, 2013
$47.37 from Amazon »

We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union...okay, enough preamble. It's America's DOB. The big...what's 2013 minus 1776? The big 237. That age when countries really start to notice their genitals...

Saturday, August 10, 2013
$49 - $100 from Amazon »

Oh holy arachnid! I'm not going to need a set of Samurai sword kitchen knives to exact retribution on that SOB onion, I'm going to need them to save myself from the Alessi Juicy Salif citrus-squeezing alien! And by "citrus-squeezing"...

Tuesday, August 30, 2011
$20.36 from Amazon »

There are a few items from my childhood I've been trying to hunt down for a while. A slush puppy machine (not slurpee, slurpees suck), an armitron, Debbie Does Dallas VHS tape and this. I'm gonna get a brain freeze....

Sunday, September 4, 2011
$8.20 from Amazon »

The Gingerbread Man always acted like such a wuss. Enter The Ninjabread Man. I think he could slide right into all of our favorite Christmas stories and nobody would bat an eyelash. Please use black icing. Stars sold separately....

Monday, September 30, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

This digital spoon scale enables measurement by weight as well as measurement by volume. That means in addition to knowing from a caloric standpoint how many pounds I'll gain over time when I transport tablespoonfuls of Nutella...

Friday, March 23, 2012
$7.11 from Amazon »

Ahhh, here's one for the kids, the kids at heart, and the practicing hipsters. The Crustache Cutter performs a little snip-snip on bread that's boringly shaped like bread to produce hilarious/clever/ironic (depending on which...

Tuesday, July 10, 2012
$11.58 from Amazon »

Yo, TARDIS, I need to run a quick errand in 2343 today. Let me just pour a cup of coffee and...TARDIS? TARDIS, dude, where you at? [The TARDIS, having been exposed to a hot beverage, has disappeared from its current location...

Thursday, September 1, 2011
$4.99 from Amazon »

I tried to stick a magnet to my fridge the other day and it just slid down the face of the fridge door and fell limply to the ground. I wonder what my fridge is made out of. I'm also confused as to what metals are actually...

Monday, September 12, 2011
$9.59 from Amazon »

The first few sips from this innocent looking porcelain mug are pretty tame, but as you continue drinking things get a lot more exciting. What's that lurking in the murky depths of your morning coffee? It's a damn shark....

Friday, February 8, 2013
Sold Out from Etsy »

I would describe this Storm Trooper mug as geeky with a side of class. Meaning that I probably wouldn't purchase it for someone who isn't into Star Wars, but I wouldn't feel bad about purchasing it for someone who is into...

Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Sold Out from Amazon »

I'll skirt the obvious meat pounder jokes here. I do see a pretty nifty dual purpose tool though. I've never tenderized meat before cooking it, but this looks like it might make the job sort of fun. And, if someone breaks...

Saturday, February 25, 2012
$6.95 from Amazon »

How many kids are going to ram the Lickety Spoon down their throats trying to mock-tongue something with it? Even if we're playing by Price Is Right rules, I think you can safely bet "All of them," and still be the closest...

Friday, June 14, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

This electric grill sits on the tabletop. Which means it is going to reduce the amount of time it takes for babyback ribs brushed with KC Masterpiece and teriyaki shrimp kebabs to transfer from its cooking surface to my mouth....

Wednesday, December 7, 2011
$9 from Amazon »

Previously reserved for the likes of your dog, your cat, your children and you after 10 shots of whatever the cool person shot currently is, now, you can enjoy your favorite wake-me-up drink from the rims of your own toilet...

Monday, August 29, 2011
$18.59 from Amazon »

The perfect gift for the coffee drinking puzzle solver. In 2nd grade, I used to physically take apart rubik's cubes and put them back together all perfect looking. My teacher thought I was a genius. And really, isn't that...

Wednesday, August 24, 2011
$6.03 from Amazon »

Slicing a banana has just become 20x easier. What? Slicing a banana wasn't difficult in the first place? Neither is folding my clothes, but I haven't done that in 3 months. Mankind is in constant search of ways to improve...

Saturday, March 3, 2012
$14.66 from Amazon »

Sweet! Somewhere to hide all the crap you wish you hadn't taken a bite out of and need to spit out! The Double Dish, a bowl within a bowl, is the perfect receptacle for gristly beef, bivalves gone bad, and entire servings...

Thursday, December 8, 2011

I can't think of anything bad to say about this product. It's not particularly inspired (it's just a plate with an extra level for syrup to pool into) but it does exactly what it is supposed to do. And it's certainly something...

Friday, June 29, 2012
$3.62 from Amazon »

For the first time ever, if someone offered me a shot of ice or a shot of Jager, I might actually choose the former. This set of 6 handgun-shaped molds packs a cache of ice cold heat that screams, "Freeze, bitches!"before...

Friday, December 9, 2011
By: Quirky

This ingenious concept product is getting ready to go into production. The juice is so much tastier when it comes directly from the tap. Stick the "stem" right into your favorite sprayable citrus fruit (lemons, limes... that's...

Saturday, August 20, 2011
$59.99 from Amazon »

This is some Willy Wonka shit right here. You take normal everyday water, and this machine turns it into soda, or sody as my grandma would have called it. It's almost like a machine that takes regular old paper and turns it...

Tuesday, August 9, 2011
$13.07 from Amazon »

This is pretty cool. Looks like it might provide a little better leverage than your average pizza cutter. The cutter has a removable shield for easy clean up and a stainless steal blade. Dishwasher safe (only way I know how...

Thursday, August 23, 2012
Discontinued

Many of us find great comfort and normalcy in our morning cups of coffee or tea. Artist Lily S would like to add some uneasiness to that equation. A mouthful, to be exact. Her Teeth Cup, molded from a full set of human pearly...

Tuesday, October 18, 2011
$25.99 from Drawer Decor »

No more cluttered kitchen drawers, no more utensils that rattle and roll around, no more organizing your spatulas and banana slicers only to have them fall right back into disarray....

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Father's Day 2012 is hitting families nationwide on June 17th. Which begs the question: Do you have that very special kind of Renaissance father who can schmooze with James Bond, thrown down with the wranglers on River Monsters...

Thursday, October 18, 2012
$9.73 from Amazon »

Cataclysmic events, such as earthquakes and alien attacks, always seem to go down when I'm relaxing with the morning paper, drinking a cup of coffee. So being the industrial, perpetually prepared fellow that I am, I have combined...

Friday, December 30, 2011
$22.28 from Amazon »

Our current Secretary of State and former First Lady certainly has her hands full these days. Fortunately her legs are free. And what better way to set them to purpose than busting nuts. Er... cracking balls. Wait... cracking...

Friday, February 10, 2012
Sold Out from Amazon »

Caffeine injections and enemas are great on the go and all, but sometimes it's that fresh-roasted aroma, and hot liquid nuttiness that really give us the stamina to keep the hamster wheel spinning. The mypressi TWIST is a...