Gear

Knuckle Lights

$44.99 Amazon »

Who wants a coupla shiners? From your fists to their eyes, these strap-on Knuckle Lights shine 150-lumen beams into the face of any who cross your path while running, walking, or making your way to a good wee-wee spot...

Amazon Smart Sticky Note Printer

Sold Out Amazon »

The Smart Sticky Note Printer is one of Amazon's first Day 1 Editions concept products, Alexa-compatible gadgets the company is testing out LEGO Ideas-style*. That is, the Smart Sticky Note Printer is available as a pre-order...

LELO F1s Developer's Kit - SDK-Available Sextech

$164 - $219 LELO »

Geeks have the best sex. Or if they didn't before, LELO's F1s Developer's Kit, a male masturbator with an SDK-available sextech console, is here to make sure they do now. Even if it's all by themselves...

EyeJust Blue Light Blocking Screen Protectors

$34.99 - $56 Amazon »

According to EyeJust, who says it's according to facts, we Americans spend around 11 hours a day staring at screens. And those screens emit a blue light that sears into our retinas, causing eye strain and vision damage...

Keyboards for Photoshop

$195.30 - $275 Etsy »

These mini Photoshop keyboards are plug-and-play collections of shortcuts for some of the most common tools and actions Photoshop users click-click-click their mouse to call up. Anyone who deals with the application regularly...

The Delightful Dunker for Cookies & Milk

$8.50 Etsy »

The Delightful Dunker is delightful for dunking your Oreos, or other sandwich cookies, in milk. Right up until the bite when your teeth hit the Dunker's teeth and you end up with a 3D-printed plastic toothache...

Real Time Cryptocurrency Price Ticker

$163.93 Etsy »

Not only does this bad boy track the price of your choice of cryptocurrency - Bitcoin, Ethereum, Dogecoin, etc. - in real time, but this bad boy is also a lady. Her name is Pauline. Pauline the Crypto Price Ticker...

Jack Offerman Wind-Up Toy (NSFW)

Sold Out Amazon »

Name's Jack, Jack Offerman. ... No relation to Nick. Well, then again, wind-up toy status notwithstanding, maybe this plastic masturbating master does have a few things in common with Nick. You'll have to ask his wife...

Rainbow Customizable Hi-Fi Headphones with 3D Sound

$120 Monixibi »

You might choose your headphones for the sound of them, but there's nothing wrong with the sight of them getting you pumped to pump some audio too. Minoxidil's Rainbows are modular over-ear headphones that will boost...

Fingers Mk III - Tapping Fingers Mechanical Sculpture

$830 Laikingland »

There's something different about this sculpture...I just...can't quite put my finger on - oh! It moved! The hand, its fingers, they drum, they tap, they rat-a-tat-tat. Just like yours and mine do. And just like Nik Ramage's...

The Pocket Engineer Wallet Ruler & Unit Conversion Card

$12.99 Amazon »

If you can't flash your AmEx Black Card to show 'em how rich you are, flash your Pocket Engineer ruler and unit conversion Black Card to show 'em how smart you are...

Deluxe Dutch Oven Kit

$39.99 Etsy »

Nothing says, I love you to the fiercest farters in your life like a Deluxe Dutch Oven Kit. Hahaha, you might think, this is such a clever gag gift! Everyone's gonna have a good laugh at The Dude when he opens it, and...

McIntosh MHA200 Vacuum Tube Headphone Amplifier

$2,499 McIntosh »

McIntosh has a swell idea for drowning out the sound of too much time at home with the fam: a vacuum. Actually, 4 vacuums - the pairs of 12AT7 and 12BH7A dual triode vacuum tubes that power their MHA200 Headphone Amplifier...

Penis Light Switch Cover

$5 Etsy »

Tee-hee-hee! Or should I say, Pee-hee-hee! Here are some penis light switch covers for all the lovers and lovers-less out there who just want a romantic night with some of that D. This penis is down for some lights-off...

Masta Box Fidget Cube & Wireless Controller

Sold Out OLOOKUP »

The Masta Box, a combination fidget cube and wireless controller for technophiles, brings functional fidgeting to the world of mind-body health. Not that the introduction of fidget toys and fidget spinners to mainstream...

PC5 People Counting Camera

Sold Out Amazon »

The PC5 People Counting Camera: for those of us who never fare so well when we run out of fingers. Designed with a 95% recognition and tallying accuracy rate when placed outdoors in direct sunlight, and a 98% accuracy...

Miniature Pocket Knives

$9.99 - $12.99 Amazon »

Got a little bone to pick? These miniature pocket knives are perfect for cutting wee bits of meat off wee tiny steaks. Or maybe, like, fork and knifin' it with a pile of buffalo wings...

Titanium Carabiner Keychain with Folding Utility Knife

$35.95 Amazon »

A clip and a snip, a link and a slice. That's what RovyVon's U4 Titanium Carabiner Keychain with Folding Utility Knife brings to the EDC table. Or rather, your pocket, belt loop, or bag strap...

Raspberry Pi Pico - RP2040 Microcontroller Chip

$4 CanaKit »

Care for another slice of Raspberry Pi? The UK computer and programming hardware foundation has just released the Raspberry Pi Pico, an RP2040 microcontroller chip. Like their other Pi-namite computers and products, the...

LAVO Hybrid Hydrogen Battery for Home & Office Power

$22,700 - $26,800 LAVO »

I'd like to say LAVO deserves a resounding "Bravo!" - or at least a fist bump - for becoming what its Australian creators call "The world's first integrated hybrid hydrogen battery that combines with rooftop solar to...

Cliffset - Portable Cutlery Set with Dishwasher

$29 Cliffset »

Always be prepared, Boy Scouts! And with the Cliffset portable cutlery set, being prepared goes beyond being prepared to chow down on some delicious food at any given moment. It includes the aftermath of on-the-go gorging:...

KALEA Automatic Kitchen Composter

$783 - $1,447 KALEA »

"Kalea" is Hawaiian for "filled with joy," and German brand KALEA hopes after inviting its automatic kitchen composter into your home that's what you, and especially your plants and lawn, will be too...

Small Business Shoutout: Ice Cream Keeper with Padlock

Thief! Karamal Sutra thief! It's a refrain heard in kitchens the world over, and it's one the Ice Cream Keeper from One Man One Garage is here to stop for good...

Blowjob Token

$11.99 Amazon »

Roll your eyes, ladies, but a Blowjob Token, obvious as it may be, is the ultimate Valentine's Day gift for a man. Actually, a Blowjob Token is the ultimate gift for a man on any day, for any reason...