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Get Sh*t Done Poster

By: on January 20, 2013
$26 - $36
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Aaron Levie, co-founder and CEO of cloud company Box, has discovered the key to success, and endeavors to share it with us. On a poster! Want to achieve? Then Get. Shit. Done. I wonder how much money seller Startup Vitamins is making from the sale of this simplistically inspirational print that I could have just as easily made and profited from had I come up with the idea first. And Get Shit Done is just one in their series of 18" x 24" and 24" x 36" bits of wall-mounted motivation geared specifically towards small business owners and employees. But it's my favorite because nothing on earth cheeses me off more than people who say they're going to do something, and then don't do it. People who talk shit instead of getting it done.

Levie's poster nutshells in 21st century vernacular the concept that success is primarily a product of action. Even failed action contributes to ultimate attainment, because at least then you can cross one more thing off your list that doesn't work. Like the time I tried to get a girl way out of my league to go out with me by telling her I drive a DeLorean and she said yes, but then ditched me when I picked her up in the Kia Rio I actually drove at the time. It was sort of crushing, but I learned two things from the experience: 1) Don't say you drive a DeLorean if you don't. 2) But if you do drive a DeLorean, you can get girls way out of your league to go out with you. So I bought a DeLorean. And now I'm livin' large with the ladies. Talk became action, resulted in failed action, turned into a lesson, prompted further action, spawned success. I got shit done.

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Pencil Time Pencils

$2.75 from Sharing Machine »

Do you know what time it is? ... It's Mother Fucking Pencil Time! Going back to school? It's Mother Fucking Pencil Time! Leaving the kids a list of chores? It's Mother Fucking Pencil Time! Filling out your order at Umami...

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Conor McGregor F*ck You Pinstripe Suit

$6,500 from David August »

I don't know how long the rest of the world will remember the Conor McGregor vs. Floyd Mayweather fight after it's over, but anyone who drops $6,500 on a David August Fuck You pinstripe suit like the one McGregor wore...

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The Big Coloring Book of Vaginas (NSFW)

$12.95 from Amazon »

Is further product description really needed? First there was Georgia O'Keefe, now there is author and illustrator Morgan Hastings. Black-and-white outlines of anatomical wonders beg for your acrylic and Crayola technicolor...

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A is for Anus: The Alphabet (For Adults)

$9.99 from Amazon »

This alphabet isn't adult just because A is for Anus, but also because of the accompanying anatomical representation author Max Willy has selected to make sure everyone knows what an anus is. Stick out your pointer finger...

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Lewd and Obscene Party Game

$24.99 from Lewd and Obscene »

Lewd and Obscene, according to creator Anthony Annese, is what would happen "if Urban Dictionary and Balderdash had a one night stand and the condom broke." Testament #1 to the validity of that statement: mentally rotate...

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Spinning F Pin

$7.99 from Ball & Chain Co. »

When indecision strikes or words fail you, let fate decide the most appropriate way to F the situation. This enamel pin secures to your lapel where it will always be within finger's reach and ready to spin-a-fuck the...

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F**k. The Game

$19.95 from Amazon »

Who would claim you can "get smarter while swearing at your friends?" F**kin' Australia, mates. F**k. The Game is an Aussie issue, and a mind trip of cards and colors and good ol' cussin' for us all. It's a spirited party...

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The Big Coloring Book of Sex Positions

Sold Out from Amazon »

According to The Big Coloring Book of Sex Positions, "Sex curls our toes, sparks our imagination, delightfully stimulates a multitude of sensations, makes us have funny faces, makes us docile and makes us crazy." Apparently...

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Disturbed Friends - The Worst Game Ever Made

Sold Out from Amazon »

Consumer drones? Wearables? Self-driving cars (and -walking shoes)? Nah. I think politically incorrect card-based games that at some point make every person playing them feel extremely uncomfortable or self-conscious...

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Kama Sutra Chess Pieces (NSFW)

Discontinued

And suddenly, the intense inaction and sporadic finger movements of chess captivate the masses and enamor even those who have no idea what the hell is going on. Erotic chess pieces abound in Etsy vendor Nicola Ford's...

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X-Rated Fortune Cookies

$16.01 from Amazon »

Every time you masturbate, God chokes a kitten. I don't know if that bit of wisdom can be found in this Chinese to-go container of of X-Rated Fortune Cookies, but it should be a staple. Get your hands out of your pants...

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Joking Hazard - Build Funny (and Terrible) Comics

$25 from Amazon »

What game could be better than combining leading and inappropriate partial thoughts to make profane and hysterical complete ones? Joking Hazard. A game that combines leading and inappropriate partial thoughts to make...