Now when the office bully threatens to ram a writing implement up my left nostril, I might not recoil in fear. I mean, a coffee bean scented pen? Bring it on, Biff! These metal ink bleeders, available in black and brown, have a translucent center cage housing a coupla coffee beans that are bursting, according to vendor CoolSutffExpress, with the rich, nutty aromas of everyone's favorite wakeup juice. Auracell, a scent-extending technology infusing the beans, purportedly makes the extra caffeinated shoutouts last an extra long time--months and months. Maybe even years if pen users are disciplined with their nasal inhalations.
They say scent stirs memory like no other stimulus. Please allow coffee bean scented pens to remind you that:
- Coffee is the best thing to douse the sunrise with.
- Sleep is a symptom of caffeine deprivation.
- The powers of a man's mind are directly proportioned to the quantity of coffee he drinks.
- Decaffeinated coffee is kind of like kissing your sister.
- Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat.
- The best part of waking up is Folgers in your cup.