Rear Window LED Messenger
- 9ft Blue Neon Strobe Wire - $7.00
- 4" High x 24" Wide Programmable Scrolling LED Sign - $119.95
- Passive Aggressive Sticky Notes - $8.53
- WTF Stamp - $8.99
- Trippy LED Chameleon Lamp - $64.95
The Drivemocion Rear Window LED Messenger is probably legal in only, like, 10 states (I'd guess the spectrally left and right ones, such as Massachusetts and Texas), but for those of you living amidst bureaucratic leniency, yippie ki-yay! No more trying to give your horn a "tone of voice", with little toot-toots meaning one thing, and long, drawn-out shatterers of the peace communicating another. This Lite-Brite-looking sphere, which suction cups easily to a car's rear window interior, allows for some real vehicular tete-a-tetes in the form of:
- A smiley face
- A winky face
- The word "Thanks"
- The word "Sorry" (Puh, kind of waste. Like you ever do anything you'd need to apologize for while driving....)
- The words "Back Off"
Ok, so being kind to fellow sharers of the road is covered. And that's great. Really. We should be nice to each other when one of us isn't doing something incredibly stupid with a 2-ton piece of machinery. Flirting with hot chicks and dudes is also covered. Excellent. Somewhat of a distraction from not veering off the road, or into another car, but still very useful. My one complaint? "Back Off". Come on, "Back Off"? "Back Off" is the most antagonistic LED-lit communication this device is capable of? Where's the frowny face? Where's the flaming-red middle finger? Where's my personal favorite question to ask people while I'm driving: "Are you fucking retarded?!" (I mean, just the other day I had to query a 16-year-old punk idling in his mommy's Lexus such that he was blocking the entire entrance to the gas station on this topic.)
But, for those less persnickety that I am, or for those who prefer to keep their ire on the down low--say, in a People I Want to Punch in the Face Journal--the battery-powered, remote-controlled Drivemocion could be your glowing ticket to more meaningful experiences behind the wheel.