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Zombie Wedding Cake Topper

By: on January 13, 2012
$75
from
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Every groom-to-be gets cold feet at some point, and this zombie wedding cake topper brilliantly summarizes both the worst and best case scenarios that could play out when that happens. Worst Case Scenario: Your feet are so cold that you actually take off running, and your fiancee must resort to physical force, and possible violence, to drag you back to the altar. Best Case Scenario: That fiancee is also a zombie, so you don't have to feel too bad about killing her to get away.

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Zombie Apocalypse Survival Kit

$346.96 from Amazon »

Are you prepared to fight for the survival and integrity of family, friends, and the human race in apocalyptic combat with the ambulatory dead? In other words, do you want to buy a 7-piece set of gut-ripping knives and...

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McWhinney Active Wedding Rings

$825 - $3,750 from McWhinney Designs »

Jeff McWhinney designs wedding rings for men who move. Like a little more than from their desk to the john, the car to the house, and the couch to the fridge. Hikers, golfers, climbers, weight lifters, even really intense...

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Zombie Apocalypse Bedding

$130 - $160 from It's Alive! Designs »

Think about those nights you bolt upright in bed, heart racing, salty with cold sweat, awakened from a nightmare just before you meet your final doom. Now think about the rush of relief you feel as you take in the solitude...

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Zombie Hammer Survival Tools

$79.95 - $139.95 from Zombie Hammer »

"Zombie Hammer survival tools are designed to last longer than cockroaches." Longer than cockroaches! Now that's a sell. This knuckle dustered cache of apocalyptic weapons must have a collective immune system of steel!...

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Flayed Flesh Garters

Sold Out from Etsy »

Take peek-a-boo garters to the next level: peek-a-boo blood vessels and layers of muscle tissue, courtesy of open-wound prostheses and stocking accoutrements from Etsy's Meaghan O'Keefe. A pair of unpainted latex prostheses...

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Zombie Head Bowling Balls

Zombies really have taken over the world, huh? Or at least the free market economy. The clever German capitalists who designed this introduction of the omnipresent living dead to the bowling alley made a good move though....

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TheTouch Real-Time Heartbeat Rings

$599 - $2,990 from The Touch »

Want to feel close to a loved one far away? Or in the next room when it's too much work to get up off the couch? As part of their mission to "make the most personal connecting tools," TheTouch is finishing up development...

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Zombie Gnomes: Bye Bye Birdie

$37 from Etsy »

This is what we call an imperfect synergy. In the battle of the two tackiest, yet most often seen yard decorations (no offense fake plastic deer), it looks as if the gnomes have won. And it was bloody. Zombie gnomes 1...

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In Case Of Cabinets

$188 from In Case Of »

In case of a zombie, vampire, werewolf, or demon emergency take this tiny sledgehammer, break the glass, and prepare to fight for your life. Or run like a girl while tossing Holy Water over your shoulder. In Case Of cabinets...

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Zombie Tools

$189.95 - $574.95 from Zombie Tools »

Am I tired of zombies? Mmm...not really. Am I tired of ominous-looking, exceptionally hand-smithed swords and knives and machetes with blades sharp enough to slice through 24 cans of PBR in one blow (and a few tries)?...

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Darth Vader Engagement Ring

$390 - $2,995 from Sapphire Studios »

Marry me and come to the Dark Side! Come on, ladies, even in you're not into Darth Vader or Star Wars, you gotta indulge any man who presents you with a Vader helmet engagement ring. If for no other reason than the license...

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The Whisk Wiper

Sold Out from Amazon »

What is this whiskcraft I see before me? You mean worming my tongue between the wire loops and getting chocolate cake batter all over my face isn't the best way to clean off the whisk when my girlfriend is baking? Nah....