Ghost Pepper Jelly
Suzanne says her Ghost Jelly is perfect for your favorite hotty. I think it's perfect for my friend Cornelius' toast, which I will butter and jelly up for him out of kindness, and inform him is smeared with orange marmalade out of evilness. Why is trickery that inflicts pain and humiliation upon others so delightful?
Ghost Jelly contains a toothsome base of habanero and jalapeno peppers, with taste-bud-incinerating accents of bhut jolokia, commonly referred to as the ghost pepper. For those who have yet to try this Indian darling, it packs triple the heat of a habanero, and is 400 times hotter than Tabasco sauce. Get ready to suck it, Wheaties. I think Suzanne has unearthed the new breakfast of champions.
In addition to lathering up a slice of Wonder Bread, Ghost Jelly performs its intended function when paired with cheese and crackers, and folded into glazes, marinades, and sauces. Despite its turbocharged heat, the jelly's primary ingredient is still pure cane sugar.