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Bees Knees Spicy Honey

By: on September 27, 2014

I'm not sure I can wrap my head around the implications--the glorious, glorious implications--of what essentially amounts to the honey bear being left alone with the Sriracha rooster in a kitchen cabinet for too long. Bees Knees Honey is a chili-infused spicy honey that can sub in for anything from hot sauce to Hershey's Syrup.

Handmade in Brooklyn from raw Hudson Valley honey and a secret combo of chili peppers, Bees Knees hits the tongue first with its delicate apian sugar and then intensifies into an immaculate explosion of cosmic heat. Yeah, I don't know. It goes from sweet to hot. Bees Knees makers say their spicy honey is the last hot sauce you'll ever need. I say bring on the massive spike in blood sugar and searing heartburn.

Suggested Bees Knees Spicy Honey pairings include: pizza; cheese; BBQ meat; eggs; and vanilla ice cream.

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Paqui Carolina Reaper Madness Chip

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Betcha can't eat just one. Maybe not even one bite. Paqui says its Carolina Reaper Madness Chip is made with the hottest chile pepper on earth, and possibly in all the circles of hell. It's so hot they package them in...

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Zach's Sprayable Wing Sauce

I had the best grilled chicken wings I ever ate on Super Bowl Sunday in Charleston, SC this year. Then the next day I got grilled chicken wings at a different spot and they became the best chicken wings I ever ate. Charleston...

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Fuego Box Craft Hot Sauce Club

Light up Father's Day with a Fuego Box craft hot sauce club subscription for Dad. Dad can't take the heat? No problem. Fuego has a Mellow Box 3-pack ($29.95) in their collection of hot sauce gifts too. You can save the...

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Satan's Blood Hot Sauce

$15.39 from Amazon »

Satan's Blood Hot Sauce comes in a "blood vial shaped bottle with 800,000 Scoville units of pepper extract." Yeah, I can see that. I can also see a cock & balls ready to spew a scorching, blinding, fiery-hot death onto...

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Sriracha Seasoning Stix

Mmmmm, impalement coming soon to steak near you. Sriracha Seasoning Stix are solidified pokers of the iconic rooster sauce--the hot cock's hot cock, if you will--made to spice up your meat prior to cooking. Press a few...

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Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat

$22.05 from Amazon »

Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat. Yep, I love me some of all of those things. But mastering them as elements of good cooking...that sounds like a job for my mama! Good thing I'll be needing a gift for her come Mother's Day on May...uh...May...something. I'll have to look that up later....

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Darth Vader Grinder

$8.74 from Amazon »

Who'd-a thought Darth Vader could grind? It looks like the Dark Lord has added pulverizing your favorite herbs and spices with an Exorcist-caliber 360-degree spin of his head to existing his repertoire of menacing, saber...

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Ghost Pepper Honey

$14.99 from Geddes Farms »

And she looked at you and said, "You want your honey? Oh, this bitch is about to give you your honey." I think that's the inspiration behind Geddes Farms' Ghost Pepper Honey. The retaliation might not go quite as planned...

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Chemist's Spice Rack

$49.99 from ThinkGeek »

I'm trying to think of a way to spin the Chemist's Spice Rack into something besides the perfect gift for a complete culinary geek, but...donut hole. Then again, as evidenced by the comments on ThinkGeek's listing of...

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One F**kin' Drop at a Time Hot Sauce

$11.95 from Amazon »

In this case, I think that inserting an eyedropper as a serving utensil for One F**kin' Drop at a Time Hot Sauce isn't more than just a kitschy packaging ploy. Reviews of the habanero- and scotch bonnet-infused mouth...