Fitness

Bello Digital Belly Fat Scanner

$189 from Bello »

It's called Bello. Because the portable device is a belly fat scanner and "decoder." And also because that's probably what you're going to do when you see its results, and read what it has to say about all that damning...

Gronk Fitness Inertia Wave Workout Ropes

$119.95 from Amazon »

I actually like Rob Gronkowski, and since the whole Gronkowski family has already been running the Gronk Fitness business for years, I don't mind that he's focusing his post-NFL-retirement time on trying to sell me shit...

Birt Plate Strength System

$30 - $200 from Birt Strength Systems »

When Ryan Birt created the Birt Plate Strength System, injury was the mother of his invention. A college wrestling champion and football player, Birt injured his elbow in a football game, and found he couldn't lift a...

AFIXT Magnetic Water Bottle Holder

$16.11 from Amazon »

While the world is full of cup holders and flat surfaces, there are still times, especially at the gym, when you've got nowhere decent to store your water bottle. Or else you've found a great spot, but it's way over there...

Gaiam Balance Disc - Wobble Cushion for Your Desk Chair

$21.98 from Amazon »

Time to start sweatin' your New Year's resolutions. The Gaiam Balance Disc is mostly a wobble cushion for your desk chair, but also partly an accessory for core strength and balance exercises out of your chair. It's a...

Beurer Infrared Heat Lamp for Pain Management & Relief

$79.99 from Amazon »

For once, seeing red can take you to a happy place. The Beurer Infrared Heat Lamp provides Red Light Therapy you can direct towards various angry body parts to ease colds, muscle tension and soreness, and aches and pains...

CubeFit Pulse Vibrating Foam Roller

$79.99 from Amazon »

Bzzzzt! No, it's not your phone vibrating. Nope, it's not the other kind of vibrating gadget in your household either. This is the CubeFit Pulse Vibrating Foam Roller. It has no messages for you, no push notifications...

Acumobility Ultimate Back Roller

$59.95 from Amazon »

The Acumobility Ultimate Back Roller is a somewhat intimidating bumpy wheel designed to release tension in the back, and reverse the unhealthy flexed, restricted state the spine tends to fall into from poor posture and...

The Friendly Swede Zipper Sweatband

$12.99 from Amazon »

Zippered sweatbands, just another friendly gesture from your Friendly Swede. These sweat-catching wrist and ankle elastics come in sets of two, each with a lined pouch for storing keys, bills, credit cards, or even your...

Coros PACE GPS Multi-Sport Smartwatch

$199.99 from Amazon »

The PACE GPS Multi-Sport Smartwatch from Coros is for all you go-getter athletes and triathletes, heptathletes and decathletes, and Netflix binge watchers who want to know what kind of altitude and heart rate change you...

Phone Storage Water Bottle

$19.07 from Amazon »

If your workout allows for carrying or keeping a water bottle nearby, I'm sure it also allows for a separate place to stash your phone and other personal items. But if you can combine the two, and keep everything together...

ClimbStation Climbing Wall Treadmill

Uh, is the ClimbStation climbing wall treadmill a sporting good or a nightmare? A fun way to stay fit and simulate rock climbing indoors, or the conveyor belt of vertical horror in the REM sleep I can't wake up from?...

EMS Butt Toner & Hip Trainer

$25.90 from Amazon »

I smell a ssssssnake. In oil form. Please don't buy an EMS butt toner and hip trainer with the expectation that it's going to give you an ass like the lade in the above image. Actually, don't buy an EMS (that's electrical...

Tracer360 Illuminated & Reflective Vest

$59.95 from Amazon »

Ride safely, and rave brightly, my friends. The Tracer360 is an athletic vest designed to provide 360-degree illumination, reflectivity, and fluorescence. It has 6 user-controlled solid LED colors - red, blue, purple...

Chair Gym - The Total Body Workout

$144.95 from Amazon »

Oh boy, Dad, this one's for you. The Chair Gym appears to express no irony in calling itself an all-in-on total body workout system that's "great for all fitness levels." I would add, particularly the fitness levels who...

WalkingPad Slim, Folding Treadmill

$499 from Amazon »

Flat white, flat iron steak, flat earth, flat treadmill. Hooray for flat! And the WalkingPad treadmill's slim design isn't even the coolest thing about it. This piece of home (or office) gym equipment is also foldable...

My Pen is Huge Golf Towel

$24.95 from Amazon »

You may have shot a 70 on the golf course last weekend, but, but my pen is huge! Look at your tiny little pencil d-...oodler next to my big fat co-...lor scribbler...

EdgeCross X Home & Portable Gym

$194.99 from Amazon »

The EdgeCross X, a home and portable gym consisting of a handled barbell, balance wheel, and resistance bands, says it can provide a total body workout that will rip you like an Olympic athlete in just 10 minutes per...

Gaiam Restore Finger Massager

$9.98 from Amazon »

I don't know, that dude sticking his thumb inside the Gaiam Restore Finger Massager looks a little questionable. Maybe not quite as ill-advised as me sticking my hand down the garbage disposal to retrieve food I didn't...

Sauna Rocket Home Steam Sauna Kit

Discontinued

Well, the Sauna Rocket certainly isn't going to class up your living room lookin' all HAZMAT ready, but, for a home steam sauna kit, I guess the price is right. Setup and space requirements don't look too bad wither...

PocketBands - Key Pocket Runner's Wristband

Discontinued

Pocketbands come in handy - or rather, wristy - for runners, hikers, and others on the move who want to travel light and leave their world behind, but also need to travel with they keys and means to get back into that...

Assault Fitness AirRunner

$4,999 from Amazon »

Go from 11MPH to 0MPH to the couch in 2 seconds flat with the AirRunner treadmill trainer. From Assault Fitness, who also make the CrossFit-loved AirBike, the AirRunner runs on human power. Your movement gets the belt...

Plexus Wheel Sport for Muscle & Back Pain Relief

Sold Out from Amazon »

The Plexus Wheel Sport digs deep. And that's probably what you're going to have to do too to sustain the initial discomfort you'll feel pressing on and rolling along these easers of the back pain, and relaxers of the...

KettleBaby - Turn Your Kid into a Fitness Tool

$60 from KettleBaby »

KettleBaby has determined you don't need to spend a wad on web-connected bikes and treadmills, on-demand workout subscriptions, or VR trainers built into your mirror to get a stellar home workout. You just need to have...