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Smooshy Face Stress Balls

By: on February 13, 2012
  • Smooshy Face Stress Balls
  • Cao Maru White Faces
  • Cao Maru White Smiling Face
  • Smooshy Face Stress Ball Black Smile
  • Smooshy Face Stress Ball White Pucker
  • Cao Maru Collection
$40.70
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Feeling stressed? Anxious? Aggressive? Don't take it out on the nonnative English speaker administering over-the-phone tech support, take it out on Ge!, Ni!, Ho!, and Poo! Cao Marus are smooshy Japanese stress relievers with alluringly messed up names, faces, and textures. The family of four was forged from polyurethane, and molded with expressions lifted directly from hidden camera footage acquired in men's room toilet stalls. Squish and contort their fugly mugs into fuglier mugs, and feel the drudgery of a Monday, or the tension of a lost vie for the last pre-wrapped egg salad sandwich dissipate.

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Fidget Cube Desk Toy

$25 from Antsy Labs »

Whether it's the caffeine jitters, public speaking anxiety, or ants in your pants, those of us who aren't trained professionals in smoothness like James Bond and Ryan Gosling in Crazy, Stupid, Love will probably feel...

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Scented Croissant Stress Toy

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I don't know if a memory foamy croissant that emits the scent of mankind's greatest pastry when you squeeze it is so much a stress reliever as it is a stress creator. Holidays got you frazzled with the shopping frenzy...

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True Mirror - How Others See You

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The True Mirror idea is simple (and old; it was first patented in 1887): place two mirrors at right angles and have a look-see. Its effect, though, elicits the complexities of realization spanning everything from Whoa!...

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Other People's Face Masks

$9.99 - $11.94 from Amazon »

Get all 4 of Faux Real's Face (of Someone Else) Masks to swap out throughout the night at this year's Halloween party and kill it as Arya Stark or Jaqen H'gar, or maybe just a generic Faceless Man....

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Water Walker Underwater Treadmill

You know those dreams you have where you're trying to run towards or away from something, but you just...can't...make...your feet...move? It's like running through quicksand, or setting concrete, or...on an underwater...

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Zerobody Anti-Gravity Bed

The Zerobody is a sensory deprivation float tank that removes the one major P in the A side effect of floating: getting wet. (True, drowning is kind of a pain too, but most of these tanks have only about a foot of water...

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Golden Snitch Fidget Spinner

$12.95 from Amazon »

A Golden Snitch fidget spinner for all the antsy, anxious, stressed, and spectral Harry Potter fans out there. Add a pair of wings to a copper hub, and you've got your very own Quidditch game for one. Well, more like...

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Muzo - Personal Zone Creator & Noise Blocker

$159 from indiegogo »

Muzo uses anti-vibration technology to turn the world off. (Makes sense, given the number of other devices that use pro-vibration technology to turn the world on--VibeRider, anyone?) At approximately the size and shape...

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The Bird's Nest Bed

The Bird's Nest Bed can accommodate up to 16 people at once. Take note swingers, Mormons, women undergoing IVF treatments, and the Duggar family! The giant basin of comfort was brainstormed and brought to life by O*GE...

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Private Gym Penis Trainer (NSFW)

$59.99 - $99.99 from Amazon »

It's the one body part P90X neglects. But before you reach for a Viagra to long-and-strongify your johnson, the Private Gym would like its shot at ripping your penis to shr-...uh.... Maybe I'll go with a different idiomatic...

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Bas Rutten O2 Trainer

$49.95 from Amazon »

Who wants to wheeze like a fat asthmatic chasing down the ice cream man? I do! I do! Temporarily anyway. MMA master and onetime UFC Heavyweight Champion Bas Rutten developed his O2 Trainer to build strength in a part...

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Electric Head Massager

$165 from Amazon »

I want to know, you want to know, so we may as well just ask: does the electric head massager give good head? And if so, how good? What kind of good? Does it just find its grip and squeeze, or is there some steady, calculated...