A Geek's Gift Guide of Gadgets, Gear and Novelties    * Updated daily

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Monday, June 25, 2012
Discontinued

And suddenly, the intense inaction and sporadic finger movements of chess captivate the masses and enamor even those who have no idea what the hell is going on. Erotic chess pieces abound in Etsy vendor Nicola Ford's online...

Tuesday, December 3, 2013
$89 from Puzzlebox »

The power of the human mind. It inspires nothing less than awe and reverence. Even the minds of idiots, which often serve either as entertainment or pleasurable, self-elevating disbelief that someone could be dumb enough to...

Tuesday, April 22, 2014
$41.11 from Amazon »

Pop-up books are ageless. Genderless, raceless, and religious and political persuasionless too. In fact, I think the only people on earth who might possibly not like pop-up books are the blind. And maybe the sighted who have no depth perception. Everyone else though, here's a Game of Thrones pop-up book for your viewing peasure. Yes that's right. Game of Thrones: A Pop-Up Guide to Westeros. Yahtzee....

Sunday, April 20, 2014
$2,500 from Stewart Golf »

Sweet, a caddy you don't have to tip or worry about getting caught violating child labor laws while carrying your clubs for 9 hours straight in 95-degree weather. British company Stewart Golf has released the X9 Follow, their...

Tuesday, July 23, 2013
$1,995 from Amazon »

Can you pull off Alice wielding a Mossberg 590 and lighting up super zombie scum in a post-apocalyptic Vegas wasteland? I definitely can...do no such thing. In terms of badass combative chicks, I could maybe pass as Jean Claude...

Saturday, May 25, 2013
$19.99 - $39.99 from Tek Recon »

It seems to me that the favorite pastime of kids today is sitting on the couch watching TV shows with adult content and playing video games. And when you make them get off the couch and go outside, they partake in their second favorite pastime, which is shooting things or blowing them up. The beauty of Tek Recon, a fusion of real-life shooter games and first-person shooter video games, is that...

Sunday, February 2, 2014
$8.46 from Amazon »

Everybody poops 410 pounds a year. Heh. Given what I've been downing today, at least 5 of those pounds are going to show themselves to me sometime between 5:00 and 10:00 tomorrow morning. Author Deuce Flanagan reminds us that...

Sunday, March 4, 2012
$9.99 from Etsy »

A comprehensive collection of people you want to punch in the face. This is the little black book anyone can fill. In fact, it would probably be a good idea to order a few Rude Books, 'cause you know you're gonna want to go...

Monday, March 17, 2014
Sold Out from Amazon »

Though Boston Dynamics sets a very high bar with their spastically brilliant WildCat, Robotis still maintains its Bioloid Comprehensive is "not an average robot kit." And given the pretty penny they're asking for it, it damn...

Monday, May 27, 2013
$604 - $768 from B Go Beyond »

I can't fit inside it. That's the primary downside to B, a patent-pending, remote-controlled car-helicopter hybrid capable of plowing along unfriendly terrain and then, when said terrain turns too rugged, lifting off and flying...

If bat shit looked like 1000mW of ice-blue lightning, the S3 Spyder III Arctic Laser would be the physical manifestation of bat shit crazy. As it stands, the world's most powerful laser is just fuckin' nuts. Wicked Lasers' (absolutely, 100% legal) handheld bolt of pure spectral power counts amongst its marketable skills the ability to: Sear through ornery plastic, pop bitch-ass balloons, burn continuously, 24/7, without sustaining damage to its laser diode, function in 9 different operating modes, including Strobe, Constant Wave, SOS, Beacon, and Tactical Hibernation, emit 0.25 Lux of light at a distance of 6,856 meters, turn anyone it hits in the eye at a distance of 149 meters or less into Ray Charles, minus the musical talent and soul.

And if that weren't enough to get it laid every day for the duration of its 5,000+-hour serviceable life, Guinness is currently testing the S3 Arctic for the official title of World's Most Powerful Laser.

The S3 Arctic Series Laser resides in an aircraft grade aluminum chassis that's smaller than a standard flashlight.

Thursday, February 20, 2014
$200 from Blaze »

Look cyclists, it's a little green you. A constant companion on the road who will never fall behind or drop you, and who will do everything he can to save you from getting rammed, flipped, T-boned, or sideswiped by a car....

Wednesday, October 23, 2013
$199 from Amazon »

Professor Plum in the dining room with the...3D glasses, suckah! Iconic board game Clue has followed Hollywood feature films into the 3rd dimension with its own 3D addition to your family fun nights. No glasses required here...

Saturday, September 8, 2012
$449 from Platinum Stages »

Life is a highway. I wanna grind it. All. Night. Long. Get outta my dreams, and onto my pole. Little red corvette, baby you're much too fast. I need a pickup truck...with a stripper pole hitched out back. I wonder how many...

Saturday, May 19, 2012
$3,999.99 from Etsy »

The practicality of slaying a dragon in 100% leather armor is questionable at best, but one thing's for sure: all the fair maidens who haven't seen this much cowhide since Kiss performed at the dairy farm are gonna dig it....

Thursday, January 16, 2014
By: PrioVR

As predicted, probably by Nostradamus and Back to the Future II (but not the Mayans because they thought we'd be dead by now), 2014 is shaping up to be the year of virtual reality. As the buzz around the Oculus Rift VR gaming...

Thursday, March 21, 2013
$13.06 from Amazon »

Here we have a book about one of my favorite topics. Yeah, that's right. Origami. Apologies that the only samples I could find during my Google image search of the sexy paper creation instructions contained in Pornogami: A...

Saturday, November 10, 2012
$26.95 from Amazon »

What better way to enjoy giving a gift as much as receiving one than to present it to its recipient in a Puzzle Pod? For this DaVinci Code-style cryptex, which must be solved before the goods inside are accessible, will likely...

Sunday, March 30, 2014
$7.73 from Amazon »

Well, Star Wars: Jedi Academy doesn't come in a sweet mechanical vault or reveal ancient secrets of the Jedi discipline like The Jedi Path, but I bet it will be an easier purchase to share with your kids. I mean that in the...

Wednesday, January 18, 2012
$6.48 from Amazon »

The lowest frequency noise a human ear can detect: a mouse. The highest: Mariah Carey. At least according to one points-for-creativity-deserving test taker included in F in Exams: The Very Best Totally Wrong Test Answers....

Friday, October 11, 2013
$46.41 from Amazon »

Hot Wheels aren't exactly cost-prohibitive so I'll still probably just buy a few when I get a hankering to dick around with toy cars at work, but for the kiddos and handy Daddy-Os out there who dig doing things themselves...

Friday, September 20, 2013
$11.11 from Amazon »

How do you declare a thumb war in Wookieespeak? Yeah, that's right, 1, 2, 3, Raaawwwrrr! Time to suit up, buckle down, and probably tie one on, Cornelius, because I challenge you to a lightsaber duel. From the knuckles down....

Tuesday, September 3, 2013
$25 from Plotagon »

You know the millions and millions of words of fanfic piled up across the Internet? Thanks to Plotagon, they're about to be joined by millions and millions of seconds of fanflick. Not that I'm complaining. I like a good alternate...

Thursday, May 30, 2013
$99 from Inteliscope »

It's a tactical time of year. Crossbows, BBQ aprons, and now a forthcoming rifle scope and rail mount system that shakes up the shooting game by using an iPhone/iPod and mobile app to give readouts of critical ballistics...

Monday, March 31, 2014
$35.99 from Amazon »

One of the most popular specialty games of all time, the #2 bestselling board game on Amazon, an average 5 out of 5 stars in over 1,300 reviews, and I've never even heard of Ticket to Ride. Where have I been living, in the...

Thursday, December 26, 2013

I don't know too much about Lexington, Kentucky. Well, really I don't know anything about Lexington, Kentucky except that beginning Spring 2014 it will be #1 on my list of vacation destinations. In Spring 2014 Ninjas, an indoor...

Friday, May 17, 2013
$129.95 from SpyTec »

One thing I've always wanted to do while fending off UV rays is record myself fending off UV rays. Granted, this usually entails lying on my ass in the company of a sand-free beach mat, a 6-pack...fine, a case...of Bud Light...

Thursday, March 7, 2013
$275 - $400 from Etsy »

I'm not the biggest Borderlands fan. The name alone carries enough of an allusion to Canada for me. Then once I see a Psycho with those penetrating indigo eyes and a mutilating buzz axe...shiver...it just conjures too many...

Wednesday, March 6, 2013
$27.20 - $85 from Shapeways »

Pain, blood, Thorn Dice: you gotta pay to play. Meandering threads of contemporary CAD technology intertwine to form polyhedral dice bodies dotted with protruding thorns and varying numerical sequences that accommodate all...

Friday, August 16, 2013
$4,497 from Iron Man Statue »

Outstanding. Not just that it's a life-size Mark 42 statue from Iron Man 3, but that whomever forged it deemed "life-size" to mean "Robert Downey Jr.-size", which is actually more like garden gnome-size. Good thing Iron Man...

Friday, January 11, 2013

Of course the Batman Chess Set costs nearly $800. The Dark Knight is a fancy superhero. The fanciest superhero of all, I would say. And check out how dashing he looks in fine pewter and diecast metal. Villains the Joker, Catwoman...

Friday, December 28, 2012
$59.99 from Amazon »

According to high-ranking officers of the Galactic Republic, through wars and rebellion, only a single copy of The Jedi Path: A Manual for Students of the Force has survived. They add, "It is now passed on to you." Holy truffled...

Saturday, June 1, 2013

The Longboard Stroller: the future of kids and mobility. The Longboard Stroller: because every kid deserves to eat pavement at the hands of a parent who didn't see the raised edge in the sidewalk. The Longboard Stroller: Naw...

Sunday, September 30, 2012
Discontinued

Anyone need a standard-issue S.T.A.R.S. line of defense? San Diego's Kendo Gun Shop has replicated Albert Wesker's customized Samurai Edge as a superbly realistic Airsoft Handgun for the awe and admiration of all Resident...

Tuesday, May 28, 2013
$895 - $3,401 from Monkeylectric »

MonkeyLectric upgrades its previous version of Monkey Light LED madness for bicycle tires with Monkey Light Pro, an installation of customized, downloaded graphics and animations that turn two wheels into two tickets to vehicular...

Friday, March 2, 2012
$345 from RcSuperhero »

A life-size, remote control foam superhero probably isn't going to be much help if you're looking for someone to swoop in and save your kid from the schoolyard bullies next time they try to weave his body through the bars...

Monday, August 5, 2013
$899.99 from Amazon »

8 and under? How about 18 and over? The High Roller Big Wheel, like bars, skydiving, Leisure Suit Larry, and all the best things in life, with the exception of nipples, was made for adults only. Big boys (and girls) who still...

Saturday, November 30, 2013
$11.10 from Amazon »

Grow Glow Snow! It's not a request, it's an order, son! Get a bowl! Get some water! Watch it expand to 100 times its starting size, just like a diaper that's been pissed in*! And, if you're a real man, turn off the lights...

Monday, March 19, 2012
$8.72 from Amazon »

Kiddie classic Pat the Bunny has been zombified. Pat the Zombie is a morbid adult spoof on the revered literary tome that famously commands children to touch it, scratch it, sniff it, and put it in your mouth. Only this time...

Friday, May 4, 2012
Sold Out from Amazon »

What I want to know is, if my friend Gary uses brute muscular force to bounce one helium-and-compressed-air-filled Skyball to its peak height of 75 feet, and my other friend Mitch drops a second Skyball from a balcony 75 feet...

Wednesday, November 13, 2013
$435 from Hovding »

The Swedish Hovding has a lofty goal: un-dorkify bicycle helmets without compromising their ability to keep bicycle riders un-dead. With claims of being one of the market's safest helmets, Hovding trades in the foam-filled...

Saturday, February 16, 2013
$35.89 - $40 from Amazon »

Bring out the gimp. The gimp's sleeping. Well, I guess you'll just have to go wake him up now, won't you? Wait...wrong S&M fetish scene. The Rubber Man suit is an American Horror Story derivation. Just as well, I guess. I...

Saturday, December 14, 2013
$59.99 from Amazon »

In Star Wars: The Blueprints, "the meticulously researched text gives voice to the groundbreaking and brilliant engineers, designers, and artists that have, in film after film, created the most imaginative and iconic locales."...

Wednesday, October 2, 2013
$9.99 from Amazon »

Even if I weren't a gambling man I would like the 50/50 Savings Bank because every day it would remind me of Plinko, my favorite Price Is Right game, and also Bob Barker, my favorite game show host and general hero of life....

Tuesday, August 20, 2013
$9.99 from Amazon »

One reviewer notes that Introductory Calculus for Infants reads exactly as advertised, except that it won't teach your baby--or you--how to do calculus. She goes on to opine that all who actually expect a children's book to...

Monday, January 20, 2014
$19 from Amazon »

These are just the facts, dudes. Clinical reporting with complete objectivity. Nothing about how Smirnoff Whipped Cream vodka in a Shot Gun is a terrific way to break the ice with the ladies at a party. Nothing about the magnitude...

Monday, December 3, 2012
$10.94 from Amazon »

Geez, even connect the dots sex looks complicated. There must be 200 numbers in each of these puzzles, and good luck trying to figure out what's lurking behind the connective ink lines before putting in the elbow grease. Unless...

Thursday, February 7, 2013
$24.95 - $64.95 from Dan & Dave »

Each of the 54 cards in Dan & Dave's Ultimate Deck brandishes a unique piece of artwork courtesy of design agency Stranger & Stranger. And yes, most of them are macabre and vaguely disturbing like the Unicorn Head Mask and...

Thursday, September 26, 2013
$114.97 from Amazon »

While RockBoard's Descender doesn't appear to be a wheeled vehicle suitable for the protruding roots and rocky drops of mountain bike trails, if its video is to be believed, it will serve as a smooth operator for anyone who...

Thursday, April 3, 2014
$12.74 from Amazon »

All I have to say is Wookiee Cookies better just be a treat Wookiees love and not a treat Wookiees are...you know...baked into. I don't need Chewie ginger snaps describing anything but the texture of my favorite after-work...

Thursday, August 30, 2012
$30 from Amazon »

It's Dungeons & Dragons for the boozin' 21+ crowd. DrunkQuest combines fast-paced card game mechanics with shades of the D&D fantasy world with a few 6-packs and a liter or two of Captain Morgan for a party game of competitive...

Thursday, January 30, 2014
$12.09 from Amazon »

I kept searching for more at the end of the Guys Can Be Cat Ladies Too book title. Some ellipses leading into a second line of ...if They Want to Die Alone on the Couch with the A-holes, Who Will Then Eat Their Owners' Raw...

Monday, February 17, 2014
$10.36 from Amazon »

Stereotypically, they're awkward. Unathletic. Unpopular. Nasally. Know-it-alls who got no game. In reality, they run the world. And maybe a lot of the 21st century's geeks still do possess some of the qualities of those from...

Thursday, September 1, 2011
Discontinued

An ultra-realistic and functional prawn assault rifle from the movie District 9. Really cool collectors item for enthusiasts and a perfect Halloween costume for someone who likes being encumbered by their Halloween costume...

Saturday, March 22, 2014

Here's a fun accident waiting to happen. Sorry about Grandma's porcelain ash urn, Mama! It's so hard to find Skee Ball machines outside of Chuck E Cheese's anymore. I guess they don't have the same bar-game allure as pool...

Monday, September 24, 2012
$639.99 from Etsy »

Dragon slaying dudes saw their wicked set of leather armor featured a few months ago, so now, ladies, it's your turn. John McGovern is peddling this handcrafted Dragon Scale Leather Armor to badasses of the female persuasion....

Wednesday, November 20, 2013
Sold Out from Amazon »

I don't know what you get when you pass Go--maybe another axe or Gator machete to add to your zombie defense arsenal--but I do know that when I play Monopoly: Walking Dead Survival Edition I'll have permanent dibs on the bucket...

Tuesday, March 27, 2012
$100k from Martin Jetpack »

The 2012 Martin Jetpack represents 30 years of research and development, a dozen or so prototypes tweaked and tested to sustain 30+ minutes of flight time at 63 mph, and over 4 long years of agonizing anticipation for the...

Friday, March 8, 2013
$10 - $25 from Machine of Death »

Just when I think games have been completely overshadowed by Breaking Bad viewing parties and orgies as the most popular indoor group activities, Kickstarter projects like Machine of Death: The Game of Creative Assassination...

Sunday, October 21, 2012
By: Flickr

Wayne Hussey and Carlyle Livingston, ye builders of the LEGO Bat Cave, I think you might win Batman Creations Fabricated by People Obsessed with the Dark Knight for 2012. Motorcycle suits be damned, I'd much rather have this...

Thursday, August 1, 2013
$224.46 from Amazon »

I have to say, it's a little disappointing to see LEGO, a pastime that has supported content diversity for decades, join the ranks of Keds, toilet paper, and P. Diddy's annual summer party, and go all white. However, I understand...

Monday, October 7, 2013
$9.99 from Hopson Kinetic »

OSM = Object for Spatial Manipulation = a kaleidoscopic sculpture made of disks = pronounced "awesome". No joke. "OSM" sounds out as "awesome" because its designers have astutely noticed that that's exactly what this endlessly...

Monday, November 18, 2013
$31 - $66 from Sphyke »

Even if you're not an indignant, self-important cyclist with a $3,500 carbon fiber bike and a fat chip on your emaciated shoulder it really sucks when you lock up your manpowered transporter like a responsible citizen, only...

Wednesday, March 12, 2014
$249 from Amazon »

NewSpin Golf hopes their SwingSmart Duo will continue to be a standout amongst the bevy of golf swing analyzers and digital coaches that have emerged with mobile tech and apps. The self-training system pairs a swing sensor...

Tuesday, June 25, 2013
Discontinued

The 3D Converter system extracts pertinent data from any video game and translates it into 3D format viewable on any 2D or 3D TV. Yep, Frogger in 3D on my 18" Sony from 2005. Now I know what all those elderly people at the...

Thursday, August 29, 2013
$100 from Wish.co.uk »

Simulate ZDay. Fight zombies. Know how Marty McFly felt when he walked down the streets of 1955. But you'll be even further back in time. You'll be in 1940, in the midst of WWII. Instead of fighting off your teenage mom's...

Saturday, August 27, 2011
Sold Out from Amazon »

The nocturnal trouble maker's dream. Powered with UV light, you can now tarnish bridges, overpasses and subway stations without fear of your genius being hidden once the sun goes down. It's very complicated vandalism and you...

Wednesday, May 2, 2012
$13.25 from Amazon »

Since most of us would rather be wet than dead, this water balloon variation on Russian Roulette is likely to generate a bit more participation and enthusiasm as a try-your-luck party game than its bullet-based counterpart....

Wednesday, January 15, 2014
$14.08 from Amazon »

Ideas? I have lots of them. At least 7 million. Like, how about a southern soul food sushi roll? Fill a steamed collard green leaf with mashed yams, tempura chicken, and some cranberry sauce. Then roll it, slice it, and serve...