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You Need More Than Balls: Top 10 Water Toys

By: on June 30, 2015
  • Easybreath Snorkeling Mask
  • Darkfin
  • Quadrofoil
  • Waterslide
  • Water Wheel
  • Balloon Launch
  • Smarties
  • Flamingo
  • Beer Pong
  • You Need More Than Balls: Top 10 Water Toys
  • Climb Wall
  • You Need More Than Balls: Top 10 Water Toys

Beach balls are classic and rectangular rafts still keep you afloat, but the creativity, tech, and fat wallets of today demand a little more of water-based entertainment. Here are my picks for the Top 10 Water Toys of Summer 2015. (Note: All items' prices are listed as they were at printing. Prices are subject to change.)

Golden Dragon Pool Float $50. 103" head-to-tail usurps the 80" you get from the Giant Pink Flamingo float. Plus, mythical beast smokes tacky lawn ornament any day.

AquaClimb Water Walls - Contact AquaClimb for price quote. My best guess: not cheap. These poolside water walls manufacture in editions Classic and Sport. The former--shorter, nubbier, and designed more according to theme park aesthetics--is intended for all ages and a wider range of installation locations, while the latter's increased height and curvature make its added challenge better suited for teens and adults. It also requires installation adjacent to deeper waters.

Darkfin Gloves $26. Ever wondered what it might be like to have webbed fingers? Wonder no longer. These durable latex rubber gloves will have you flying by the other frogs in the water. Perfect for SCUBA diving, swimming, and surfing.

Quadrofoil Electric Watercraft $18,500 to $28,000. Here's your chance to jet across the water on an architectural insect. With the Quadrofoil you can do it quietly and without injecting carbon-based fuels into the subsurface ecosystem too. This personal watercraft operates with a silent motor and zero emissions electrical tech, making it not only a cleaner option for aquatic joyrides, but also one that can shoot along lakes, rivers, seas, and eco-zones where most motor boats and PWCs are prohibited.

World's Biggest Backyard Water Slide $149. Not only is Wahii's slippery snake 75' long, but it's 12' wide as well. Set it up on a hill or downslope in about 15 minutes with Zulu-Stick fasteners to hold it to the grass, and a sprinkler positioned at the top (no hose hook-up required).

Aqua Treadmill $220. This World of Watersports creation gives us humans the long-awaited opportunity to take part in an activity previously reserved for rodents. With enough room for 3 people, partakers need only climb inside and begin walking forward while pushing against the wheel's front wall. Flipping and rolling along all carefree and catawampus appear to be options as well.

200-Yard Water Balloon Launcher $16. This one's gonna take you, your friend Cornelius, and your friend Victor to load & explode. Made with real surgical tubing and fitted with rip-proof vinyl grips, the wicked blaster means it when it says hot summer fun, parties on the beach, and all-out war.

Smarties Noodle Pool Float $10. Mmm, sweet, tart & inflatable. The only place this childhood candy might look better than in my mouth is in the pool.

Floating Beer Pong Table & Cooler $45. So much for the bounce shot. If you've got the skills, the balls, and the body of water, here's your ultimate floating barge o' beer pong. The center cooler for brew storage is even more good lookin' out from the drinking game gods.

Easybreath Snorkeling Mask $50 to $110. Full-face coverage means no tube to chomp down on and no mask clearing required. The Easybreath design removes some of the difficulty, nuisance, and drowning that comes with breathing underwater.

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Sick in the Head: The 10 Coolest Motorcycle Helmets

Some people say you're sick in the head for riding a motorcycle. I say you're sick in the head if you're wearing one of these motorcycle helmets. And I mean it in the very, very best sense of the word. Here are my picks...

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Budget Your Time: The 10 Best Men's Watches Under $100

Wearing a watch gives you one less reason to check your phone. Wearing a watch that costs less than $100 gives you one less reason to ask your girlfriend if she could maybe pick up dinner. For the next 6 months. Here...

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TRITON - Human Gills

Discontinued

TRITON, the human gills design concept I showed you dudes here 2 years ago (and which many of you had mucho to say about in our comments section) is running a crowdfunding campaign to actually produce the equpiment. TRITONs....

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Water Walker Underwater Treadmill

You know those dreams you have where you're trying to run towards or away from something, but you just...can't...make...your feet...move? It's like running through quicksand, or setting concrete, or...on an underwater...

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Scorkl Handheld SCUBA Tank

$200 - $600 from Kickstarter »

Bite down on a Scorkl and you'll score 10 minutes of untethered underwater breathing. No snorkel confining you to a foot below the water's surface, and no loading up with a 35-pound SCUBA tank and BC like an aquatic pack...

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FireWater Water Bottle & Lantern

$16.55 - $21.02 from Amazon »

The FireWater Multi-Bottle from Seattle Sports combines a water bottle, a lantern, and a waterproof storage container into one collapsible and rechargeable piece of gear. Handy....

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The Bond Next Door: Top 11 Tools for the Everyday Spy

RC surveillance mosquitos and robotic hummingbirds as security cameras may not be perfect tech yet, but they're on the rise and constantly improving, with some available to commercial markets for testing. And even looking...

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Leidenfrost Effect Ring

$31.80 from Grand Illusions »

I love the dude who makes Grand Illusions' videos. I think his name is either George or Hendrik. Both because George Auckland and Hendrik Ball are the two Brits who founded and run Grand Illusions out of an 18th century...

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8-Person Island Raft

$120 - $319 from Amazon »

What is there to say about Tropical Tahiti's floating island raft fit for you and 7 of your favorite water-lovin', sun-soakin', float-happy, swimsuit-clad cats besides P-A-R-T-Y and O-R-G-Y?...

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Modpools - Shipping Container Swimming Pools

$26,900 from Modpools »

Rather the seal him inside a shipping container bound for Abu Dhabi, why not fill that shipping container with water and let Odie dog paddle around inside it with you this summer? Dig up a big hole in your backyard, and...

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Hidden Water Pools

One time a couple of minutes ago I saw a patio that turned into a swimming pool! That's crazy! Almost Fletcher Capstan expandable table proportions of crazy, and definitely more in compliance with my agenda of spending...

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Swim Desk

$1,999.99 from ThinkGeek »

While great for your joints I'm not so sure how good the Swim Desk is going to be for your computer and mobile phone. Definitely recommend keeping a vat of rice on hand while work-stroking at it. And also maybe an EMT...