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The TRON Light Cycle

By: on August 23, 2011
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Yeah, it costs more than twice the country's 2011 median income, but two little words make it worth every penny: Street. Legal. If you can convince the bank, or your mom, to spot you the cash, a living, breathing replica of the computer-animated cycle from the 2010 film TRON: Legacy will earn you the awe and admiration of every pulse-possessing male aged 8 to 44. Plus probably after-hours access to every drive-thru espresso stand barista you'll ever meet. Good thing the Light Cycle requires riders to lie almost horizontal astride its black leather seat because horizontal is a position any owner of this ticket to eternal ass is going to have to get used to.

The Light Cycle's aesthetic splendor begins with a steel frame, which is covered by a fiberglass cowling to replicate the sleek look of its computer-generated counterpart. Electroluminescent strips embedded in the wheels and body puppeteer laser-esque displays of awesomeness during casual cruises and gamer's convention tailgates. A fuel-injected Suzuki 996cc, 4-stroke engine, and 6-speed constant mesh manual transmission will make the bike go, but only your dedication and stalker-training skills will get it to Olivia Wilde's front door.

No conceivable way of acquiring the requisite 55 grand? Don't worry, there's a LEGO version that still might score you some points with the 8-year-old children of single moms....

UPDATE: Parker Brothers Custom Choppers is now working on a new version of their street legal TRON bike, powered by lithium batteries and a 96-volt electric motor that's (supposedly) capable of a top speed of 100 mph. It can also go 100 miles on a single 15-35 minute charge with enough juice left over for that signature TRON lighting.

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Sick in the Head: The 10 Coolest Motorcycle Helmets

Some people say you're sick in the head for riding a motorcycle. I say you're sick in the head if you're wearing one of these motorcycle helmets. And I mean it in the very, very best sense of the word. Here are my picks...

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Bandit9 Odyssey Motorcycle

On the down side, Bandit9's new Odyssey motorcycle shares its name with a Honda minivan. But on the up, this bike's futuristic black steel unibody and see-through Avionics Display are slick and covetable enough to help...

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Sexy TRON Outfit

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Wise shoppers know that when buying a gift, you should choose something for the recipient that you would never choose to buy for yourself. In that vein, this smokin' hot, 12-gauge clear plastic TRON corset lined with...

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Wolverine Style Hand Claw Dagger

Sold Out from Amazon »

What the WTF Amazon? You're in the weapons trade now? These costume-y looking hand claws have real blades of razor-sharp, 8.75-inch, 440C stainless steel, which make them exponentially and disturbingly more portentous...

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Motoped Survival Bike

$2,499 - $3,149 from Motoped »

Universal mounting rack. Three gallons of fuel. In critical times, Motoped's Survival Bike puts escape in the hands of your feet. The military-inspired superhauler has a back rack assembly primed for multiple bolt-on...

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Velomacchi Waterproof Motorcycle Backpack

$269 from Amazon »

Velomacchi's Roll-Top Waterproof Backpack has motorcycles in mind, but isn't just for motorcycles. The bag will cover you, or rather, cover your goods and gear, on any type of bike you ride, and over any type of terrain...

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RYNO One Wheel Motorcycle

$5,295 from RYNO Motors »

Ever wanted to pop a perpetual wheelie? Well get ready, 'cause RYNO Motors is in production and set for the 2012 US release of two tiers of its self-balancing, single-wheeled, shit-stirring beast of a motorcycle. OK...

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Yamaha NIKEN 3-Wheel Motorcycle

By: Yamaha »

Is Yamaha's NIKEN a threesome you could go for? The company will formally unveil its 3-wheeled motorcycle on November 6, 2017 at the Yamaha "Pioneers of Emotions" EICMA Press Premiere (you can watch it live at 9pm CET...

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Gunbus 410 - World's Biggest Motorcycle

A Texas-sized hog made in southwest Germany. Leonhardt Manufacturing's Gunbus 410 owns the current title of World's Biggest (Running) Motorcycle. That means you can really own and operate the steel-and-aluminum behemoth...

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TRON: Legacy Siren Gem Bodysuit

$2k from Dame Fatale »

Sadly, this bodysuit covers more skin than the TRON corset, but since it's made out of stretch fabric instead of 12-gauge plastic, it does allow for increased mobility during re-enactments of the movie's action sequences...

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NUVIZ HUD for Motorcycle Helmets

$499 from NUVIZ »

If you're not lucky enough to be selected by Skully to beta test their HUD motorcycle helmet, you might consider joining the line to own the NUVIZ take on motorcycle Head-Up Display. The NUVIZ Ride:HUD, a joint venture...

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DC & Marvel Comics Suits

$169.99 - $349.99 from Fun.com Suits »

Holy Marvel of Washington DC, Batman! They made a suit out of you! As teased in a preview a couple weeks ago, Fun.com is releasing a line of men's (funny / monkey?) business suits in tribute to your favorite superheroes...