Baby Mop Onesie
Finally! A use for babies! Come on little Timmy, you need to work up an appetite and I need to see my reflection in those hardwoods. That's right, time to earn your breast milk, son. And try not to get too sweaty or haggard in the eyes as you mop. I still want you to look cute when feeding time comes so your mama will be all wrapped up in your preciousness and maybe not notice that her nipple has slipped out for my discreet viewing pleasure.
Made from 100% cotton and powered by 100% elbow grease, this onesie-dust-mop combo will cozily outfit and prepare your mini me for the manual labor he can expect to encounter all throughout life. Unless of course you're rich and don't plan ever to make your kid do an honest day's work, in which case the romper can just serve as an adorable and ironic source of fodder during your next Roaring 20s dinner party.
The baby mop onesie is lined with ultra-absorbent mop microfibers and is available in 3 sizes: 3 to 6 months; 6 to 9 months; and 9 to 12 months. Vendor Firebox.com notes that they in no way encourage or support child labor, so I guess I'll have to encourage and support it enough for the both of us.