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Well Endowed Zentai Suit

By: on October 25, 2015
  • Well Endowed Zentai Suit
  • Well Endowed Zentai Suit
  • Well Endowed Zentai Suit
  • Well Endowed Zentai Suit
  • Well Endowed Zentai Suit
$44.99
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I see your Little Green Man, and raise it one Huge Green Man. If you prefer Orange, Red, Yellow, Blue,, Purple, or Never-Go-Back Black, I have Zentai suits in all of those extra-tight, extra-long-schlong colors too. So what exactly does one who buys an 11% Spandex, 89% nylon bodysuit blessed by the God of Fertility dress up as for Halloween? That is for you and your imagination to decide. If it were me I'd either keep it simple, get the Gray Zentai, and go as an elephant, or keep it simple, get the Red Zentai, slap a potato on the shaft, and go as a dictator.

Well endowed Zentai suits have an open-face style rather than the traditional full body sock construction so everyone will know who the genius who decided to show up both in and with his long johns is. The suits' floor-length appendage is filled with vacuum cotton.

Want to channel your skin suit testosterone to other party of your body? Check out Flex Design Costumes' Muscle Suits. Or opt to carry a more PG long, strong lightsaber and go for a Star Wars Zentai.

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Nature's D*ck Pics 2018 Wall Calendar

$19.99 from Amazon »

Leave it to nature to penetrate our...hearts. The Nature's Dick Pics 2018 Wall Calendar takes us on a 12-month tour of some of the most striking rock formations Mother Nature ever created. When she was horny....

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Sexy TRON Outfit

Discontinued

Wise shoppers know that when buying a gift, you should choose something for the recipient that you would never choose to buy for yourself. In that vein, this smokin' hot, 12-gauge clear plastic TRON corset lined with...

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Wobbling Willy - Your Face on a Dildo (NSFW)

Dudes, check out the Wobbling Willy's practical application for all those selfies you've been taking. Your face on a dildo. A way, way sexier (and more functional!) gift for your girlfriend than that framed dick pic you...

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Fear Mongering: The 10 Scariest Halloween Masks

The fear factor of these scary Halloween masks lies somewhere between disturbing and spine-chilling. Between nightmares for the night and nightmares for the month. Between Ugh, what is that? and CAN. NOT. UN. SEE. I'm...

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Flowering Penis Coffee Mug

$15.99 from Amazon »

For all the ladies (and fellas!) who count floral patterns and penises amongst their favorite things, have I got a mug of a gift for you. Clothing and accessory brand HUMAN goes for a very anatomical part of being one...

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Arkham Harley Quinn Costume

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Cartoons and reality have met, merged, and are now calling out to your carn(iv)al sensibilities. Sinister, hard-edged, Brooklyn-tongued Harley Quinn makes the likes of animated wet dreams Jessica Rabbit and Holli Wood...

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Embarrassing Box Prank Mailer (NSFW)

$14.99 from Amazon »

D*ck in a Box is back! Just in time to dil-dole out some good times at the office and an April Fool's Day gift or two. Like many popular send-it-anonymously pranks, maker Witty Yeti will take a sworn oath to mail your...

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Muscle Suits

$735 - $3,499 from Flex Design Costumes »

The body builders at Flex Design Costumes might be the only body builders on earth who can guarantee they'll jack up, carve out, and rip your muscles to shreds with absolutely no effort on your part beyond telling them...

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Other People's Face Masks

$9.99 - $11.94 from Amazon »

Get all 4 of Faux Real's Face (of Someone Else) Masks to swap out throughout the night at this year's Halloween party and kill it as Arya Stark or Jaqen H'gar, or maybe just a generic Faceless Man....

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How to Pee with Morning Wood

$13.95 - $60.90 from Zazzle »

A self-help guide to dealing with the enormous issue I face first thing in the morning every single day of my life and it's packaged as whimsical wall art that will add immeasurable character to my bathroom? How to Pee...

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TRON: Legacy Siren Gem Bodysuit

$2k from Dame Fatale »

Sadly, this bodysuit covers more skin than the TRON corset, but since it's made out of stretch fabric instead of 12-gauge plastic, it does allow for increased mobility during re-enactments of the movie's action sequences...

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DC & Marvel Comics Suits

$169.99 - $349.99 from Fun.com Suits »

Holy Marvel of Washington DC, Batman! They made a suit out of you! As teased in a preview a couple weeks ago, Fun.com is releasing a line of men's (funny / monkey?) business suits in tribute to your favorite superheroes...