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Star Wars Thigh-Hi Style Tights

By: on November 11, 2015
  • Star Wars Thigh-Hi Style Tights
  • Star Wars Thigh-Hi Style Tights
  • Star Wars Thigh-Hi Style Tights
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Rotund. Top heavy. Proportional even. But never before would I have considered describing R2-D2 as leggy.

I like it.

And you're not looking so bad yourself, Lord Vader.

These Legs, legs, legs...Artoo! and Legs, legs, legs...Vader! tights are a sexy alternative to thigh-his--all the eye-catching, peek-a-boo appeal, without the constant fidgeting and readjusting of tops that keep shifting and falling down. Above the Star Wars surprises the tights continue on a sheer, Tatooine-hued path to standard, full-length tights with a crotchal region and waistband.

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Flayed Flesh Garters

Sold Out from Etsy »

Take peek-a-boo garters to the next level: peek-a-boo blood vessels and layers of muscle tissue, courtesy of open-wound prostheses and stocking accoutrements from Etsy's Meaghan O'Keefe. A pair of unpainted latex prostheses...

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Luke Skywalker's Landspeeder

$499.99 from Radio Flyer »

My Episode IV A New Hope is that Luke Skywalker's Landspeeder hears the collective wail of all adult Star Wars fans and comes out with pre-order information for a second model of the replica X-34. One that supports weights...

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Stormtrooper Whiskey Decanter & Shot Glass

$14.61 - $26.79 from The Fowndry »

A stormtrooper who's packing nothing but Jameson and a Buttery Nipple is my kind of stormtrooper. I bet in whiskey decanter and suspended glass forms they're even a decent shot. At least until round 7 or 8 when your own...

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Star Wars Adult Onesies

$64.45 from Amazon »

Star Wars onesies for adults are what's called being comfortably chic on Halloween, and F'ing awesome the other 364 days of the year. Boba Fett, R2-D2, a stormtrooper, and the grandaddy of being the worst daddy of all...

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Millennium Falcon Asteroid Coffee Table

$6,499 from Regal Robot »

The only thing this Millennium Falcon Asteroid Coffee Table is missing is my feet. As Han Solo and Chewie expertly maneuver their ship through an asteroid field to evade Vader and his fleet, I relax with a Bud Light Lime...

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Python Skin Death Trooper Helmet

$3k from ELEMNT »

I think this python skin Death Trooper Helmet solidifies maker ELEMNT's position on Team Dark Side. Their first snaked-out Star Wars replica payed homage to Darth Vader, and was shaped around one of the 1,200 collector's...

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The Darth Knight

$1,500 from Ebay »

You love Batman, but you're a loyal Star Wars fanboy. Halloween is coming up and you have a difficult decision to make. Can you betray Darth Vader for your new crush on the Dark Knight? Good news. You won't have to. Mash...

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Star Wars Pipes

$55 - $69 from Etsy »

One good way to bring the Dark Side and the Light Side together is to get them all stoned. What, we're fighting? I'm trying to eradicate you from the galaxy? OK, well...why don't we order some deep dish pizzas...and a...

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Boba Fett Motorcycle Helmet

Unlike a few selections in this slideshow of sick motorcycle helmets, you can probably wear HJC's new RPHA 11 Boba Fett helmet without getting laughed off the road (it's an obvious, but not over-the-top Star Wars circus...

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The Force Awakens First Order Stormtrooper Helmet

$200 from Anovos »

The good news is this is the first ever Standard Line version of a Star Wars: The Force Awakens First Order Stormtrooper Helmet, and you can have one for $200 ($249.95 if you wait until October 1 to order). That bad news...

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Rebel Bass Guitar

$945 - $1,325 from Doni Guitars »

No longer must you search the galaxy to find this Rebel Bass, but you will have to wait at least 3 months to get it. Last Fall, after photos of his custom Star Wars guitars had gone viral online, Englishman Doni opened...

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Boba Fett Edition Nerf Rival Apollo XV-700

$89.99 from GameStop »

Hold on to your fantasies of Nerf-blasting your friend Cornelius in the junk like a Mandalorian warrior at the beach this summer. This Boba Fett edition Rival Apollo XV-700 won't ship until November 2017 (just in time...