Crossbow Snowball Launcher
Concussion, anyone? The Crossbow Snow Launcher blasts a sizable wad of hard-packed snow up to 60 feet to strike the included target (yeah, like that's ever making it out of the box) or wallop your deserving victim. Schoolyard bully, good luck trying to bear children in the future. Cyberbully, you think the three perfect orbs formed in the contraption's snowball press can't shatter your window AND pummel you in the jugular after a couple hours of prep time in the freezer? Three-legged yellow lab...uh, sorry about that. Kids who get bullied typically don't have the best aim.