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110dB Lung-Powered Signal Horn

By: on December 11, 2016
$10.77
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Strictly speaking, Attwood Marine's Bellow Signal Horn is meant for boaters and sailers, a tool to be kept on board for use in alerting others of your presence, or draw attention in emergency situations. You can also use it on land for the same purposes--a call for help, an attempt to keep wild animals at bay.

Or.

You could take the 100-decibel horn powered purely by your filled-up lungs and puffed-out cheeks to the Monday Night Football game. At your friend Cornelius' house. Pick 6, mother F'ers, brace for impact!

Continuing down the path of mischief, I bet the Signal Bellow Horn would make a terrific Christmas gift for your older brother's 9-year-old. You know, the same brother who used to put a ghetto blaster next to your face in bed and turn on "You Give Live a Bad Name" at max volume to wake you up on Saturday mornings.

The Signal Below Horn requires no CO2, Freon, or batteries to operate. Just a healthy respiratory system (sorry, stoners). It standas 8" tall and measures 3-1/2" wide.

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Helmfon Noise-Cancelling Helmet

Looks like Helmfon Jr. is playing with Daddy's noise-cancelling helmet again. Don't worry, kiddo, you'll grow into Darth Helmfon's sound absorber and privacy sphere soon enough. And then all the power of the Audibly Dark...

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Mattel Classic Football Game Keychain

$11.99 from Perpetual Kid »

Mattel's handheld Classic Football gets sized for even smaller hands in this mini version of the iconic 70s game. Calling it a "keychain" is a bit of a stretch - unless you like stuffing keychains the size of Little Debbie...

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NERF Nuke

$99.99 from ThinkGeek »

Though we've long since entered the nuclear age, NERF has always inexplicably resisted foamifying the most powerful bomb in the world into a play toy for children. That is, until now. Dribble your drool upon the NERF...

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Sonnet - Off-Grid Mobile Communication

$89 from Sonnet Labs »

I was going to write you a sonnet about the forthcoming Sonnet, a hexagon of wireless communication that let's you send smartphone messages, images, and GPS locations to other Sonnet owners even when there's no cellular...

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Geizeer Ice Cube Air Conditioner

$119 - $129 from Geizeer »

Make that "Geizeer Super Cheap and Eco-Friendly Ice Cube Air Conditioner." (And it's actually pronounced "Guy-zer," not "Gee-zer," even though in my head it will always be the latter.) At an operational cost of less than...

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Muzo - Personal Zone Creator & Noise Blocker

$159 from indiegogo »

Muzo uses anti-vibration technology to turn the world off. (Makes sense, given the number of other devices that use pro-vibration technology to turn the world on--VibeRider, anyone?) At approximately the size and shape...

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Hushme Voice Mask & Muffler for Mobile Phones

$149 - $189 from Hushme »

The Hushme is like the Baby Muzzle for adults! Of course, they spin it that the (Bane-approved!) voice mask and muffler serves wearers and their privacy while taking phone calls in public, not that it protects all the...

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Noria Window Air Conditioner

$299 from Noria »

Granted, when it's hotter than a dragon's undercarriage out and I'm tasked with sleeping through the night, I don't really care if the air-circulating device that makes that possible looks like Jabba the Hutt's butt crack....

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G2 Turbo - Wearable Fan for Back(pack) Sweat

$19 - $23 from Kickstarter »

Part of me hopes the Presti G2 Turbo becomes the Little Crowdfunding Project That Could. Because I just saw The Goonies on cable for the 400th time, and this aerator of back sweat - what inventor Edwin Wang calls the...

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Dyson Pure Hot+Cool Link Air Purifier

$502.54 - $584 from Amazon »

Sure, the Dyson Pure Hot+Cool Link Air Purifier has the Dyson name going for it. The air de-polluter and fan also has both Warm Me and Blow Me settings, so you can use it all year 'round to help achieve an optimal level...

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5" Battery Operated Clip Fan

$34.99 from Amazon »

I saw this little battery operated clip fan for beach chairs, backpacks, treadmills, and strollers when I was looking at Seville's UltraSlimline Oscillating Tower Fan. That one got some good press in a Best Fan roundup...

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Here One Wireless Smart Earbuds

$273 from Amazon »

Listen up! Or, put on a pair of Here One earbuds and drown out my babbling with their smart noise cancellation and wireless audio streaming systems. Here One says their the first earbuds of their kind able to incorporate:...