Crime Scene Beach Towel
Perfect for a long lazy nap on the beach after a 12 pack of duff beer the night before. It measures a full 30" x 60" and is made of a super absorbent velour. Velour! I've always wanted to drape myself in velour.
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TRITON - Human Gills
TRITON, the human gills design concept I showed you dudes here 2 years ago (and which many of you had mucho to say about in our comments section) is running a crowdfunding campaign to actually produce the equipment. TRITONs...
Human Burrito Blanket
A couple of giant Human Burrito Blankets will make sure your Tortilla Baby knows who Mommy and Daddy are. At 5' in diameter, I'd be able to roll up one fine bean, cheese, rice, and man meat burrito in this flour tortilla...
Sand-Free Beach Mat
I would like it very much if CGear's Sand-Free Multimat stayed sand-free by emitting an invisible dome barrier that repelled...no, forcefully rejected all granular compounds...and children...that got within a foot of...
Dude Wipes
Dude Wipes: A Brief Overview of Audience and Application. Dude Wipes are for dudes. And every once in while--say, every 18 to 24 hours--dudes tend to have an especially...explosive...encounter with the bathroom. The kind...
The SunDen Smart Rig & Cooler
Your wingman for summer has arrived. Well...its crowdfunding campaign has anyway. Like the Coolest Cooler before it, the SunDen hit Kickstarter this week seeking to consolidate and elevate, optimize and smartify all facets...
Inflatable Water Ball
Jesus will have nothing on you if you just buy this ball. You'll be walking on water in no time. It looks like it would be a huge pain in the ass to blow it up though. I know my pack a day habit would make it very difficult...
Shibumi Shade Wind Powered Beach Tent
Windy days at the beach usually spell bad news for your beach tents and sunshades, but the Shibumi Shade doesn't just thrive in windy conditions, it's powered by them. An ocean breeze of as little as 3 MPH is all it takes...
Party Bird Island Rafts
What's better than a magic carpet ride? A big magical unicorn pool float. A giant pink flamingo party raft. A huge and handsome floating peacock island. All big enough to bob you and 5 of your best buds around the lake...
Strange, Silly & Standout Swimwear
My collection of strange, silly, and standout swimwear is for dudes and ladies who march to the beach of their own drum. Sun bums who aren't just ready for, but who crave the double-takes and ogles they'll get from everyone...
Sandscreen Sand Removal Bag
If glitter is the herpes of the craft world, then sand is the herpes of the beach. No wait, make that the chlamydia of the beach, because according to Sandscreen, their Sand Removal Bag can actually help you get rid of...
Fuzzy Ball Instant-Dry Hand Towels
These Fuzzy Ball Towels look more like what I'd use to suds up and wash my body than to dry it almost instantly. But I guess they have magical microfiber properties that suck up water with a quickness, and also their...
The Best Men's Slides
The best men's slides are boxed and ready to walk you right into summer. Right 'round the beach and pool. Right down the street on a beer run free of wool socks and a down jacket. And, oh yeah, right into the fetid shower...