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Epic Frog Escape

By: on September 12, 2011

This 2 minute video clip is the equal of any movie I've seen this year. Suspense, intrigue, a classic soundtrack. I won't ruin the ending for you... but the good guy wins. This is the gutsiest damn frog I've ever known (apologies to Kermit).

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The Extractor Bite & Sting Kit

$15.72 from Amazon »

Stung by a bee? Bitten by a snake? Suck it up, son. Or rather, suction it up. With [cue appropriate vacuum pump music]...The Extractor!...

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Python Skin Death Trooper Helmet

$3k from ELEMNT »

I think this python skin Death Trooper Helmet solidifies maker ELEMNT's position on Team Dark Side. Their first snaked-out Star Wars replica payed homage to Darth Vader, and was shaped around one of the 1,200 collector's...

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Shomer-Tec Titanium Escape Ring

$65.23 from Amazon »

Shomer-Tec's Titanium Escape Ring won't just serve as a symbol of your love for and commitment to your wife, it will also get you out of the handcuffs that chick from the hotel bar leaves you in after she Roofies you...

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SOS Parachute - High-Rise Building Escape System

Panamanian inventor Morris Shahbazi once bragged to disbelieving ears that his SOS Parachute, an emergency evacuation system for people in high-rise office buildings, hotels, and residences, could open in 100 feet, or...

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Covert Escape Nickel Compass

$24.48 from Amazon »

If I had a nickel for every nickel that's ever gotten me out of a pickle, I'd have...one Shomer-Tec Nickel. Because, holy Thomas Jefferson, dudes, the Shomer-Tec nickel isn't just your average five cent piece. It's also...

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The Frog Log

$27.99 from Amazon »

It's not easy being green, but install the Frog Log in your swimming pool and you'll at least make it easier for the hued dudes to climb back out when their poor decision-making skills, or gravity, entice them in. And...

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Stinger USB Emergency Escape Tool

$21.95 from Amazon »

Ztylus says the Stinger is a USB car charger that can save your life. And not just figuratively when you're on your last 8% and get a very promising hit on Tinder. In addition to the dual USB ports fed by your car's cigarette...

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26-Pound Gummy Python

$149.99 from Vat 19 »

Oh look, a snake that can kill you without biting, constricting, or even being alive. At 84" long, 26.9 pounds, and a staggering 36,720 calories, the Gummy Python will inflict anything from hyperglycemia to ruptured intestines...

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Silicone Swimming Fingers

Sold Out from Amazon »

While they don't boast the superhero aesthetic of Darkfin Gloves--more like the hand-got-tangled-up-in-a-jellyfish aesthetic--these Silicone Swimming Fingers consume a lot less room both in your bag and on your body than...

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Readyman Hostage Escape Credit Card

$12.95 from Amazon »

This is all of course presuming you get to keep your wallet after you've been taken hostage. And that you can maneuver your cuffed, roped, or zip-tied hands inside it to grab Readyman's credit card of escape tools. Oh...

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Python Skin Darth Vader Helmet

$3k from ELEMNT »

If ladies can spend $3,000 on a snakeskin purse, there's no reason I can't spend $3,000 on a snakeskin Darth Vader helmet. Well, there's one reason: ELEMNT is making only one of them. So if my friend Cornelius gets it...

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Knitted Dissections

$25 - $105 from Etsy »

Emily Stoneking of aKNITomy would like to welcome you to her "icky and cuddly world of knitted anatomy, where biology no longer smells like formaldehyde, but like your favorite sweater." The artist creates her series...