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Zombie Gnomes: Bye Bye Birdie/cole-bar-multi-functional-7798.jpg "Cole-Bar Multi-Functional Hammer")
Although I enjoy calling people tools, I don't really understand how the term came to be an insult. Aren't tools generally helpful and beneficial to the cause of man, as opposed to the burdens of dead-weight idiocy implied by the word's more...
/square-beam-hd-flashlight-6456.jpg "Square Beam HD Flashlight")
Hey kids, not only will Bushnell's Torch flashlight illuminate the bogeyman and monsters under your bed, its blast of a 165-lumen, perfectly square HD beam of light will probably blind them long enough for you to grab your Sap Cap and more...
/man-knives-6407.jpg "Man Knives")
I was going to call Logan Pearce's handmade knives, which seem to grow seamlessly out of manly implements such as wrenches, bolts, rebars, and tire irons, "Tool Man Knives". But "tool" has such a negative connotation anymore, especially when used to describe a man. I know because I hear it...I mean say it...often. The point is, Pearce's exceptional creations deserve nothing even flirting with negativity more...
/jabiru-bottle-top-stemware-7691.jpg "Jabiru Bottle Top Stemware")
GIVEAWAY ALERT! We are giving away Kinkajou Bottle Cutters to 5 lucky Dude readers! And unlike going to the airport, entry is quick and hassle-free. Sign up by May 7, 2013 using the form below. more...
/kinkajou-bottle-cutter-4047.jpg?mode=crop "Kinkajou Bottle Cutter")
GIVEAWAY ALERT! We are giving away Kinkajou Bottle Cutters to 5 lucky Dude readers! And unlike going to the airport, entry is quick and hassle-free. Sign up by May 7, 2013 using the form below. more...
/strong-like-bull-magnets-7294.jpg "Strong Like Bull Magnets")
My friend DeAndre ran with the bulls in Pamplona once, and he assures me that the expression "strong like bull" is no, well, no bullshit. People get impaled and tossed and stampeded and DeAndre saw one guy take a horn to the achilles and then the bull jerked its head and tore his leg open all the way to the hamstring. I mean, I guess if you're going to get the entire back of your leg carved up more...
/key-knife-6055.jpg "Key Knife")
Hey, it's a lock back Key Knife for all of my knifely pursuits, such as opening my fan mail, defending myself against my neighbor's deceptively aggressive Havanese, and slicing through vacuum packs of PB2 Powdered Peanut Butter, otherwise more...
/the-jawsaw-electric-4924.jpg "The JawSaw")
WORX's JawSaw endeavors to make limbing and trimming efforts--which help the arrival of fall suck even more--slightly less of a pain in the ass. Part pruner, part chainsaw, the JawSaw's extendable handle and electrical powering eliminate more...
/piranha-multipurpose-pocket-tool-2578.jpg "PIRANHA Multi-Purpose Pocket Tool")
Grab a PIRANHA pocket tool, and become a hero of life. With just this palm-sized, multi-purpose nugget of brilliance you'll be able to swoop through town popping bottles of Bud, tightening the bolts of leaky plumbing fixtures, securing more...
/Lightsaber-Handle-Flashlights-535.jpg?mode=crop "Lightsaber Handle Flashlights")
Let's face it, even though we're adults now (sort of), we're still very damn scared a little bit scared of the dark. Rather than walk this path alone, why not carry a known Jedi weapon at your side? It provides a sense of security. more...
If bat shit looked like 1000mW of ice-blue lightning, the S3 Spyder III Arctic Laser would be the physical manifestation of bat shit crazy. As it stands, the world's most powerful laser is just fuckin' nuts. Wicked Lasers' (absolutely, 100% legal) handheld bolt of pure spectral power counts amongst its marketable skills the ability to: Sear through ornery plastic, pop bitch-ass balloons, burn continuously, 24/7, without sustaining damage to its laser diode, function in 9 different operating modes, including Strobe, Constant Wave, SOS, Beacon, and Tactical Hibernation, emit 0.25 Lux of light at a distance of 6,856 meters, turn anyone it hits in the eye at a distance of 149 meters or less into Ray Charles, minus the musical talent and soul.
And if that weren't enough to get it laid every day for the duration of its 5,000+-hour serviceable life, Guinness is currently testing the S3 Arctic for the official title of World's Most Powerful Laser.
The S3 Arctic Series Laser resides in an aircraft grade aluminum chassis that's smaller than a standard flashlight.
/The-Worlds-Most-Powerful-Laser-100.jpg?mode=crop "The World's Most Powerful Laser")
