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Where I've Been Scratch-Off Map

By: on January 20, 2012
$45
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What a fun way to track your world travels, or clever gift for your favorite ostentatious globetrotter with a mild gambling compulsion! One side of the 16.5" x 12" map is covered in a metallic patina that scratches off like a dried-out scab as you vacation in Bora Bora, rock climb in Patagonia, or attend a quality control conference in Poland. Every 1 in 1,275,000 maps also awards a pot of gold to the lucky Paddy who scratches off Ireland. Even better, every 1 in 5,000,000 maps reveals an untapped oil reservoir to visitors who scratch off Saudi Arabia, though doing so is risky, as the maps of 1 in 5 travelers to any country in the mideast will blow up as soon as their quarters penetrate the coating. The map comes in a travel tube, and the back of it is white with black outlining, so you can fill in your flight paths, and have something to doodle on at the Athens airport while you wait for the pilots to finish their strike.

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The World According To Americans

$8.25 - $47.95 from Zazzle »

With the possible exception of the "AIDS" label that's covering half of Africa, some of these American stereotypes of the rest of world are surprisingly lacking in wickedness. I would have expected less superficial ignorance...

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Zippelin Inflatable Truck Tarp Travel Bag

$505 from Freitag »

A recycled truck tarp, a couple bike tire tubes, and Zippelin-doo-dah - you've got an inflatable travel bag. A big and sturdy travel bag whose "frame" blows up light as a Bud when you need it, and then empties out so...

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Mainland USA, According to Common Sense

$8.25 - $47.95 from Zazzle »

The sad thing is, I'm pretty sure all of these "jokes" are based on actual statistics from the US Census. The other sad thing is, I bet the 95% of us who couldn't name half of the color blocks when looking at a blank...

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Anti-Kidnapping Watch Band

$20 from Gearward »

Mark Greenman has seen the TIHK and raised it a ceramic razor blade, a 4' Kevlar friction saw, and one trip to the lower hemisphere. In his own words: I designed the A-K Band because I plan on traveling to South America...

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The Secret Lives of Superheroes Prints

$20 - $50 from Society 6 »

Greg-guillemin reigns supreme: Best Paparazzo Ever. I knew Wonder Woman's rack wasn't real. But I have to say, I definitely took it for silicone over Kleenex. Her tissue-molding skills are impressive. Superheros may pick...

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Evolution of the Bat-Signal Poster

Discontinued

Geez, 30 permutations of Batman's Bat-Signal from 1940 to 2012. I wish the stale logos of Ford and Chevrolet would take a page out of the progressive DC Comics' book. Maybe then I'd consider buying an American car as...

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Portable Armrest Extender & Divider

$25 from Amazon »

To put this armrest extender and divider on my airplane seat the next time I fly somewhere do I need the person next to me's permission? I mean, it's not like the Knee Defender, aiding in my comfort at the expense of...

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Black Swan Superyacht

In a way it sucks that the Black Swan Superyacht is just a concept right now because that means its technologically-advanced, supremely-luxurious, ninja-shark-looking self doesn't really exist. But in way it's good too...

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Map of the Internet

$36.95 from Zazzle »

Jay Simons: student; amateur graphic designer; Slovakian; Internet cartographer. If the Web were divided into land masses, grouped along lines of latitude and meridians and flattened into a map on your desk, what would...

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US State 3D Wood Topographic Maps

$75 - $125 from Etsy »

And if you go with Florida, you can use your 3D Wood Topographic Map as a perfectly level cutting board! Haha, Florida's flatter than piss on a plate. I've always wanted to ride a Schwinn 10 Speed top-to-bottom through...

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Pilot Real-Time In-Ear Translator

$299 from Waverly Labs »

Even though Pilot's crowdfunding campaign hasn't even launched yet (expect it on IndieGoGo very soon) this translator has already got the internet abuzz. In English, Spanish, French, Portuguese, German.... Not only does...

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Star Wars on Earth Prints

Stirring scenes from American history, meet stirring scenes from American sci-fi. This set of 4 Star Wars prints from Thirteenth Floor pits some of the Empire's worst villains against some of our own greatest war heroes....